Tales From Two Archbishop Desmonds

Two games were on my mind on this day. My local team Frome Town were playing Hanwell Town at home, while Chelsea were also at home to Hull City. If I am honest, I wanted to see both. Frome were riding the crest of a fine recent wave – three wins, fifth in the league – but I knew that I would be attending the Chelsea match. This wasn’t to be something as serious or as life changing as me having to decide between the two.

“The first temptation of Chris?”

Not quite.

But I knew that I wished I could have been in two places at once. One day I will have to decide between Chelsea and Frome Town. It will be the toughest of decisions, the toughest of days.

At 6.50am, I set off for London.

The Half-Moon Cafe

We have been visiting “The Half-Moon Café” on the Fulham Palace Road for a few years now. I had dropped PD and LP at “The Eight Bells” at 9.45am, where they breakfasted at “The River Café”, but I had to park up near Queens Club, so tied in a visit to this excellent café first. Everything lined up in a traditional 4-4-2.

Bubble

Bacon – Bread – Butter – Fried Egg

Baked Beans – Liver – Black Pudding – Mug Of Tea

English Mustard – Brown Sauce

I wolfed it all down. Not only tasty but cheap; all this for just £11.50.

The Eight Bells

From my spot on Kinnoul Road, I decided to walk the mile-and-a-half from the bottom end of Hammersmith to the bottom end of Fulham. The District Line was closed, so many supporters going to the match would be faced with alternative methods of reaching Stamford Bridge and their usual watering holes. I got my steps in and was happy that I walked into the pub at 11.19am, not 11.20am, one minute ahead of schedule. We’re always happy to beat the GPS predictions, aren’t we? Deano had just joined Salisbury Steve, Lord Parky and P-Diddy.

The People Who Grinned Themselves To Death

I soon took a photo of the lads and shared it on “Facebook”. Deano had just mentioned that he had played some Beautiful South in the morning, but chastised himself for the links to The Housemartins, and thus Hull. So, I jumped in and gave the photo a reference that stemmed from The Housemartins’ second album. Rather that, on this day of days, than the title of their first one; London 0 Hull 4.

PD And Deano

The Perry Boys. Steve was wearing a Fred Perry polo-shirt too, and to complete the roll-call, Parky was wearing a “Pretty Green” polo shirt, and I was wearing a “K-Way” polo. After all, Hurlingham was just a stone’s throw away.

Selfie

My friends Nat from Kansas and Sujin from California arrived at 12.30pm and settled down for a chat alongside us. I last Saw Nat at Cardiff City last year, but I had not seen Sujin since a match at Manchester City a few years ago. Nat is a keen University of Kansas college football fan and when she mentioned their rivalry with Missouri, I reluctantly mentioned that the latter’s band, “The Marching Mizzou” once appeared at Stamford Bridge before and, infamously, during a game that I attended against Derby County in March 1975. Her face dropped. Nat was aghast that Kansas’ big rivals had a link with her beloved Chelsea. There was also a predictably sad moment when I asked where their two seats were located. Whenever friends say “West Lower” I always feel like giving them a pacifying hug and say something sympathetic, knowing that it’s a quiet section of the stadium, full of folk that never feel the need to join in with our hundred and one songs of support. We spoke about a lot of football and I absolutely loved it that both Americans saw the logic of me and my boycott of the 2026 World Cup.

Chelsea Smiles

We caught a bus on Putney Bridge to Fulham Broadway, then made our way towards Stamford Bridge. Time was moving on but there was time for photos.

London Five

Wiltshire, Somerset, Kansas, California. Ironically, we had not mentioned the match in the pub. But Hull City were riding high and yet to concede a single goal.

Fly The Flag

I was in, rather too rushed for my liking, at 2.45pm. I took my place alongside Alan, Clive and PD, fresh from the nine-goal jamboree on Wednesday. I spotted a new addition among the flags and banners in The Shed Upper; an old-school Union Jack that carried the same Chelsea font as an infamous flag featured in “The Football Factory” in 2004.

Teams

I was looking forward to seeing the fine lines of the classic Hull City kit. In my mind, it’s the best of the bunch of this season’s Premier League teams. I love the broad stripes and far from intrusive sponsor. It’s class. Ours isn’t too far behind.

Xabi Alonso lined up his troops in a 4-2-3-1

Emi Martinez

Malo Gusto –  Wesley Fofana – Levi Colwill – Jorrel Hato

Reece James – Romeo Lavia

Pedro Neto – Cole Palmer – Morgan Rogers

Joao Pedro.

Hands Up

Oh those lovely kits.

Flap

In the early-exchanges, I caught a shot of Emi Martinez attempting to catch a high ball. His form over the course of the game would be variable, to say the least.

Goal

After just seven minutes, a lovely break up field. Palmer carried the ball up the right, guided the ball inside to Joao Pedro, who passed the ball on to Rogers. A burst of speed, a low shot at goal. It wasn’t apparent to me, straight away, that the ball was in. The roar of the crowd, and the lack of a linesman’s flag, was enough.

Joy

I love the smiles on the face of the scorer and the supporters in the East Lower.

Leap

And I love this leap against the backdrop of supporters too.

Remembering

Just after another lovely passing move that ended with a shot from Gusto, many of the crowd – literally thousands – clapped on the twelfth minute in memory of the much-loved Agi who passed away during the week. I stood, too, as did a few around me. Although I never see it on a match day, there is a large Cyprus Blues flag that hangs on the wall of the Matthew Harding to my immediate right, overlooking the West enclosure. Agi was proud of this permanent fixture at his beloved Stamford Bridge. I took a photo of a flag that usually hangs at the other end of the West Lower. It’s the flag that father and son Tony and Kyle Broadbent took to Munich in 2012. Sadly, not long after Munich, Kyle died in a terrible accident at work, and then the grief-stricken Tony died of cancer a few years later. It seemed appropriate to commemorate all three on this day.

Loft

Here, Neto tries to hit a blue shirt from a free kick. On twenty-one minutes, Palmer was in a very similar position to his goal on Wednesday, and I was hoping for the same cool shot to the left, but he passed outside to Neto and the chance was lost. Until then, we had carried the bigger threat but looked slower than most occasions this season in moving the ball forward. Not long after, the Hull City ‘keeper Konstantinos Tzolakis went down injured, and there was a break in play.

Punt

After the extended stoppage, the visiting goalie took a goal-kick that was punted long. The ball bounced high inside our half, but the next time that a player touched it was when it was a couple of yards from the goal-line below me, and Gusto was trying to shadow his marker and hope that the ball would go off for a goal-kick at our end. Alas, a stronger challenge would have been better. Ryan Giles was able to hook the ball in, high, but Hato made a complete mess of the flight of the ball, decided not to meet the bounce. Mohamed Belloumi was on hand to smash the ball past the dive of Martinez. Bollocks.

You’re So Vane

I wonder how many in our global support base – millions upon millions of the buggers – can name the former player who is depicted on the old weathervane that sits high upon the East Stand roof. Down below on the pitch, Hull created a very similar chance that resulted in Leeds’ second goal on Wednesday. A cross, a lay-off, but thankfully Martinez saved the effort this time.

Catch

Martinez caught this one, and so did I.

Tigers

The visiting Hull supporters packed out their allocation of three thousand. I have enjoyed visiting Hull over the years – five games, five wins – and it is a city that now shuffles its love for both rugby league and football. We once memorably stayed in a hotel / pub in Hull for the mighty sum of £7.50 per person for the game in 2020.

Chasing The Game

Six minutes after the equaliser, a corner down below me, and a free header from Semi Ajayi with Martinez unable to reach the cross. His effort crashed against the bar. It came back and Belloumi was able to slam the ball in via a deflection. Buggering bollocks. Soon after, the away supporters sang “we’re gonna win the league” but nobody believed them. Not even them.

Wide

This shot from Gusto was deflected wide.

Spot The Ball

There had been a terrible lack of movement from the lads in the forward positions as the first half fizzled out.  Two lame corners ended a frustrating half. Sadly, down in Frome, Dodge were losing too; 0-1. Hanwell Town’s home ground is just eight miles from Stamford Bridge. I was hoping for a “Frome / Chelsea doubler” this season but it won’t happen; shame. At the break, we were all disappointed with our wilting in the second part of the first period. Alan handed out some treats to cheer us. He did the same midweek. Would his lucky halftime Cadbury’s chocolates do the trick like they did against Leeds, or were these ideas of mine just a careless Wispa? At the break, Alonso replaced Hato with Chavarria.

Twist

This was a classic Cole Palmer move. I love capturing these moments.

Threatening

We hoped a new vitality would dominate as we attacked – here via Rogers – the Matthew Harding. Down in Somerset, joy as Jon Davies made it 1-1.

Line

I often try to capture the jostling for position at throws and corners. It’s almost like a sub sport these days; a sport within a sport. Or rather, a non-sport.

Face-Off

Joao Pedro, up to his antics.

Sir!

“He’s being naughty, sir!”

Who? Me?

“What have I done?”

Waiting

Reece James takes aim.

Shot

Sadly this flew wide.

Waiting For The Ball To Drop

All eyes on the prize.

Claimed

The Hull City ‘keeper just about reached this. At the other end, Martinez blocked well from Regan Slater, then reacted to stop the ball from reaching Oli McBurnie.

Wing Play

Neto put in another good shift out wide, but I am afraid that his final ball was occasionally lacking. Nevertheless, this felt like we were turning the screw.

Pace

On sixty-six minutes, I captured the pace of Cole Palmer on film, as he raced past his marker down below me. He nutmegged a second defender, and the ball was played perfectly to the waiting Joao Pedro.

Wallop

I only caught the follow-through of the strike; the ball was well on its way into the top of the goal net. It was absolutely slammed home.

Thumbs Up

Phew.

Let’s Go

There were no celebrations; just a desire to keep going.

Close

More wing play from Neto. Down in Somerset, Frome were 2-1 via a first-ever goal from left-back Zack Ali. On seventy minutes, much applause for Valentin Barco who replaced Romeo Lavia. The Chelsea world has been purring about Barco of late. Alan said that he was reminded of N’golo Kante somewhat, what with his nimble-feet and effortless passing. Chavarria down below me was enjoying a fine game; something about his running style and his gait reminds me so much of Cesar Azpilicueta.

At The Other End

On seventy-five minutes, a low shot from James was saved. On seventy-eight minutes, Danny Welbeck replaced Gusto. He hadn’t had a great game, but I didn’t like the roar as his name was announced. At the other end, Brooke Norton-Cuffey broke well but this shot did not worry Martinez. An effort from Welbeck – his first touch I think – was saved.

A Late Chance

A strong run from Rogers suggested we had it in us to nab a late winner, but his low shot was saved by Tzolakis. However, with five minutes to go I admitted to Clive “I’ll take a draw now.”

A Low Cole

This lad’s close control was amazing, even when off balance.

Outnumbered

Five against one, he still maintained possession. At the other end, a super low cross was met at the back stick by Mohamed-Ali Cho, but Martinez scrambled across to smother brilliantly. Down in Frome, Hanwell Town scored a very late equaliser, and it ended 2-2.

Fresh Legs

On eighty-six minutes, Alonso replaced Neto with Estevao and Fofana with Lacroix. The Brazilian soon tested the Hull ‘keeper at his near post.

Closing In

Here, the zesty Brazilian tries to race away but our marked man sees his space closed down.

Pink Boots

What would Chopper have made of all of this? Estevao was upended soon after this photo, and we sensed one final chance.

Summit Talks

Five Chelsea players figure out the best way to steal a winner.

Decision Time

Cole or Reece? I wasn’t sure, but it was more suited to an inswinger from Cole.

Over

The ball ballooned over, the final moment.

So, two 2-2 draws for my two teams, and that was that. It took me a further thirty minutes to walk the one-and-a-half miles back to the car; at least I had given myself a nice cardio-vascular workout between the breakfasts and the football. I back-tracked down to “The Mitre” to collect my fellow passengers and we headed west.

It had been a disappointing game of course; there is no doubt. But I had to keep reminding myself that Xabi Alonso has only had six games – and only four Premier League games – to test his ideas and to get some sort of plan together.

He knows where there are shortcomings.

He knows the score.

We’ll be OK.

See you at Brentford.

Tales From A Nine-Goal Thriller

Chelsea vs. Leeds United : 9 September 2026.

Here was yet another trip to London, the fifth in a run of eight Chelsea matches, all in the capital. On this Wednesday night, neatly sandwiched between two league games, we were playing a League Cup tie at home to our old adversaries Leeds United. Additionally, here was a condensed stretch of three trips to London in just seven days.

PD came up with me for this match. After parking up on Rylston Road, I spotted friends Liz and Long Tall Pete in “Vanston Cafe” at the bottom end of the North End Road and joined them for a bite to eat. This was a first visit for me; I wolfed down a chicken schnitzel burger, and two of Pete’s spicey chicken goujons for good measure too. Tasty food – recommended!

I spent some time with PD and Salisbury Steve at “The Eight Bells” where it was lovely and quiet, and we had a good natter. News of the starting eleven came through as we made our way up the steep steps at Putney Bridge tube station.

Xabi Alonso had certainly rung the changes.

Mike Penders

Josh Acheampong – Maxence Lacroix – Levi Colwill

Malo Gusto – Reggie Watson – Valentin Barco – Pep Chavarria

Estevao Willian – Danny Welbeck – Jamie Gittens

A debut, then, for young Reggie, at just sixteen and-a-half years old. A lad young enough to be my grandson if I had originated from Liverpool.

Gulp.

That’s a gulp for me coming from Liverpool, not him being my grandson.

Alas, there were delays on the District Line, with trains being held in both directions, and this resulted in us waiting on the northbound platform for over half-an-hour. More than a few Leeds fans disappeared off to find buses, cabs and Ubers. We decided to wait it out. At last, we just about squeezed on a train at just after 7.30pm. On the way to Fulham Broadway, we heard that the kick-off had been delayed for fifteen minutes. Outside the West Stand, I had never seen so many folks lining up to enter. Delaying until 8.15pm was a sensible move.

I made it to my seat at 7.55pm.

There were rumours of an incident at South Ken, but Alan had also heard of trouble at High Street Ken. I wondered if some Everton supporters had finally appeared after being chased down the tunnels at that station in 1978.

Stamford Bridge never looked like being full on this Wednesday night.

However, the Sleepy Hollow was in full force for this match; me, Alan, Clive, PD sitting cheek-by-jowl. Long Tall Pete was in the row in front. Perhaps he was looking for his two chicken goujons. Pete, like many, had been displaced from The Shed by the four thousand visitors from Yorkshire.

I smirked when I saw three thousand of them in the Shed Upper massed behind signage that proclaimed “World Champions.”

“No, not you.”

The teams took to the pitch.

Chelsea in blue / blue / white.

Leeds in yellow / black / yellow.

This was an odd choice from them; if it had been blue shorts, they would have not looked so alien. Their club colours from time immemorial are white, yellow and blue.

The game began with us attacking their supporters in The Shed. Soon into the game, they began their choruses of a few favourites.

“All Leeds aren’t we?”

“We are Leeds, we are Leeds, we are Leeds.”

We edged the first part of the match. There was a decent run by Gittens on the left, and into the penalty box, but his shot was parried by ‘keeper Michael Zetterer, whoever he might be. This was followed up by some nice play between some blue shirts, but a shot was blocked. The visitors were sloppy with their passing and gave the ball away cheaply in the first quarter of an hour.

Despite the noise emanating from The Shed, he Matthew Harding – which had been virtually silent – decided to mock the away support for their support.

This was pure irony.

Pure pantomime.

I suspect that Leeds had sold virtually all their allotted tickets, and these were probably priced more than the standard £30 for league games. I would have liked to have heard more from our loyalists but there were only sporadic outbursts from the home areas.

Sigh.

On twenty minutes the game came to life. A long throw from the far side was not dealt with, and Brenden Aaronson latched on to a loose ball. Penders blocked well from close range but was then able to spring to his feet to push over a header from Tarik Muharemovic.

From my angle, the saves looked spectacular.

I gasped “that’s almost the best I’ve seen up here” to Alan.

Penders pushed the ball behind from the resultant corner, but from the next one, we witnessed a different story. The ball was pumped long, and despite the close attention of three Chelsea defenders, Muharemovic climbed at the back stick and looped a header back over Penders who had wandered into no man’s land.

I saw the ball cross the line, but there was an eery silence for half-a-second until a) the Leeds fans saw the reactions of their players and b) the noise travelled the one-hundred and twenty yards to my lugholes.

Bollocks.

CFC 0 LUFC 1

Leeds, with their tails up, then dominated the game. On twenty-six minutes, a fine run and cross into the box, and we were lucky to escape. Three minutes later, a one-two and a strong run and cross by Danny James on their right, and the ball fell to Sean Longstaff, but he rushed his shot and the ball flew over.

Leeds were impressing me with their all-round play. We were second best all over the pitch.

On thirty-six minutes, the much-maligned Gusto did not spot the run from deep from Estevao and chose not to pass into space to allow the Brazilian the chance to advance. What followed was a pitiful display of “woe-is-me” histrionics from the youngster, and when he threw his arms up in a show of indignation, it looked like he was treating the people of Wakefield, Bramley, Pudsey and Beeston to his very own Christ the Redeemer.

Bloody hell.

We carved out so few chances.

On forty-two minutes, the ridiculously quiet Welbeck went just wide from an Estevao pass. Efforts from Gittens and Barco did not trouble the Leeds ‘keeper.

The debutant Watson was booked for a tackle that was pure Vinnie Jones in the final minute of the half.

At the break, the mood was very negative. Collectively we had been poor, and individually too. Watson the debutant had shown a degree of effort and enthusiasm, but of course it is so difficult to knit everyone together when they have not played as an eleven ever before.

During the day, my friend Jimmy had shared some sad news about a well-known Chelsea supporter who had passed away that afternoon. His dear friend Akis Kyriakou (aka “Aki” / “Agi”) had retired back to Cyprus recently, and Jimmy only visited him at a care home on Monday while he was on holiday. Agi had been suffering with dementia for some time. I can’t claim to know Agi well, but I recognised his face and he recognised mine. I would bump into him on European trips, and he was always smiling. Agi was deeply loved in the Chelsea community. His “Cyprus Blues” flag proudly flew on the West Stand wall for many years. At half-time I went to say a few words to my friend Zak, a dear friend of Agi and Jimmy, and we remembered him fondly.

RIP AKIS KYRIAKOU

As I returned to my seat, I saw Reece James and Pedro Neto warming up on the pitch. However, Alonso was not stopping with just two changes.

He made a phenomenal four substitutions at half-time.

Neto for Gusto.

James for Watson.

Palmer for Estevao.

Rogers for Gittens.

Our personnel suddenly seemed to increase in value by 100%.

But the pesky Northerners were not keeping to the script. Just two minutes into the half, a strong run by Ethan Ampadu, wrestling his way easily past Rogers, enabled him to reach the by-line and cross low. The ball was craftily touched back by Lukas Nmecha – “oh here we go” – and Aaronson smashed the ball in.

Fackinell.

South 0 North 2.

The away support roared.

“UNITED ARE BACK. UNITED ARE BACK.”

Momentarily, all seemed lost.

But Chelsea started to piece things together. On fifty-three minutes, Chavarria was upended by James in the box, and we were handed a lifeline. Palmer claimed the ball and confidently smashed the penalty to the ‘keeper’s left. It nestled snugly in the corner of the goal nets.

Perfect.

Vinnie Jones 1 Tony Dorigo 2

With that, Stamford Bridge, so docile until then, seemed to be injected with a lorryload of Class A stimulants, and the noise boomed around the stands. Leeds must have wondered what had hit it.

“CAREFREE – WHEREVER YOU MAY BE.”

Lo and behold, just two minutes later, a throw from Acheampong, a chested lay-off from Rogers into the path of Palmer, and from the edge of the “D”, the coolest finish anyone is likely to witness this season. A nonchalant sweep of his left peg, and the ball slowly tumbled into the goal, with Zetterer either unwilling or unable to move. He would probably claim he was unsighted, since Palmer deftly aimed around a lone defender.

Ron Harris 2 Billy Bremner 2

Now the noise went up a notch further.

“AND IT’S SUPER CHELSEA.”

Three minutes later, Palmer to James, but just wide.

On the hour, delicate skill from Barco – growing into the game now – allowed the ball to be moved on. Leeds inadvertently passed the ball to Palmer who advanced the ball towards Rogers, making a strong central run. His slide moved the ball on, and from a very similar position to Palmer, Neto aimed at the far post.

Zetterer was again beaten.

The place erupted again.

Pensioners 3 Peacocks 2

The noise increased even more.

We were all breathless.

Just five minutes later, and just after Palmer had gone close, we witnessed lovely skill from Danny Welbeck inside the box from a pinpoint Rogers cross. He dummied one way before swivelling to stab home the other. His euphoric run over to the far corner was accompanied by tumultuous cheering.

Bloody hell.

Blue / Blue / Yellow 4 White / White / Red 2

Palmer hit the side netting.

Would there be more goals? Sadly yes, at The Shed End. Substitute Dominic Calvert-Lewin finished off a crisp one-touch move with fifteen minutes to go, and – ridiculously – it became nervy again.

Millwall Badge 4 Smiley Badge 3

Wesley Fofana replaced Colwill. The game began again, with a new vigour and a new sense of jeopardy.

On eighty minutes, Rogers broke strongly down the right and aimed a low cross into the six-yard box. The luckless ‘keeper touched it towards the waiting Barco, who smashed the ball purposefully home.

Headhunters 5 Service Crew 3.

The Bridge noise levels went through the roof and other cliches.

I caught the Argentinian’s slide down below me and caught his wild emotion. This was another fine game from the young lad; on the evidence provided, he might well turn out to be the buy of the season.

Still Leeds kept going; here was a mazy run into our box on their left, but a shot was blocked.

Palmer fancied varying it with an impudent chip, but the ball was well over.

Six minutes of extra-time were signalled.

In the fourth of those, a nice move built up after Leeds head tennis, and Palmer flicked towards finding Neto wide right. His ball inside was helped on by Rogers, then Palmer again. It ran to Barco who slashed wildly. The ball was heading off for a goal-kick but hit Welbeck and caromed into the net.

Wallop!

Jimmy-Floyd Hasselbaink 6 David Hopkin 3.

What a bloody ridiculous night. At half-time, nobody could have possibly expected us to score six in the second half. At times, it was breathtaking. It was glorious. And it was loud.

In fact, the noise produced from 1-2 onwards was the highlight for me. It showed that we can still produce our old-style Chelsea noise when needed.

Top marks.

Happy to snap five of the nine goals too.

I walked back to the car and collected PD from outside “The Mitre” within twenty minutes. After a delayed kick-off, I was hoping for a quick getaway. Alas, soon into my return trip home, the Fulham Palace Road was closed so I had to painfully retrace my path back to the North End Road. On top of that, the M4 and then the A303 was closed. This meant that I had to trudge slowly over Salisbury Plain through Ludgershall to Devizes.

On the way home, we wondered if we had ever been losing at half-time, with no goals, only to score six in the second period.

I doubt it.

We thought about nine goals in a game.

Neither of us had seen more. We both remembered the 1986 Full Members Cup Final, when nine goals were bizarrely shared and this was my personal high for many a year. How odd that my first trip to Wembley with Chelsea would result in nine goals. I had recollections of a 7-2 home win a few years back, but the 6-3 win at Goodison Park in 2014 didn’t come readily to mind.

But these games remain the highest for me.

1986 : Chelsea 5 Manchester City 4.

2010 : Chelsea 7 Sunderland 2.

2014 : Everton 3 Chelsea 6.

2026 : Chelsea 6 Leeds United 3.

Nearing Melksham, where PD’s car was waiting, I was hanging.

“I just want to brush my teeth and get to bed.”

I eventually reached home at 1.40am.

I still made time to share the joyful leap from Danny Welbeck on “Facebook” though. I couldn’t deprive you from seeing that one.

On Saturday, yet another trip to London as we play host to Hull City.

See you there.

AKIS KYRIAKOU RIP

Thanks Jimmy for the lovely photo.

Tales From The Big Weekend

Chelsea vs. Brighton And Hove Albion : 30 August 2026.

After our win against Luton Town in the League Cup on the Thursday, Chelsea’s next match was another home game – against Brighton – on the Sunday. But that fixture was only the middle fixture of games on three consecutive days for me.

Either side of the game with those pesky blighters from Brightonia, Frome Town were at Chertsey Town on the Saturday and at home to Bath City on the Bank Holiday Monday. Each one of these games were important, but as they came one after the other, I am breaking Tales protocol and writing about the last game here, rather than splice it together with a later Chelsea match report.

It seems the natural thing to do.

Three games in three days.

The big weekend.

But don’t worry; the Chelsea game is the sizeable filling in the middle.

Here goes, then.

An away game at Chertsey Town was the first on the agenda. They were top of the Southern League Premier South and represented a very difficult assignment for manager Danny Greaves and his troops. I drove up to London with my friends Louise and Steve, and we constantly spoke about Frome’s recent glories, and other points of interest, which invariably featured footballing minutiae from our personal histories. I am amazed Louise stayed awake.

I admitted to them that I was sorely worried about the possibility of Dodge getting zero points from the two games on this momentous weekend. Unbelievably, Steve was uncharacteristically gung-ho about our chances and predicted a win. I was so shocked, I almost crashed my car. Steve is, at times, rather negative – “glass half empty” – about football matters, so this was a real surprise.

We hit some dreadful weather en route, but at around 1.30pm we were huddled around a cosy table in “The Coach & Horses” just a few minutes’ walk from Chertsey’s neat Alwyns Lane ground. A gaggle of Frome’s loyal supporters were at the next table. I had visited it on the corresponding Bank Holiday weekend in 2024; a deserved 1-1 draw that time.

We took our seats in the fine main stand, and I spotted a few Chertsey supporters with Chelsea attire. The ground is just inside the M25, and the rollercoasters of Thorpe Park are visible at the northern end.

With one eye on Monday’s game, the manager made several changes to his starting eleven. It was a tight and combative match from start to finish. On thirty-seven minutes, Frome’s Archie Ferris poked home a cross from close range. It was a deserved lead. The home team enjoyed a dominant spell, but David Duru made it 2-0 just as the home team started to fade. A late consolation goal from Chertsey made the last few minutes incredibly tense, but Frome held on for a very fine victory. The gate was a disappointing 496 which included around forty travelling Frome supporters.

On the drive back to Somerset, I think I had caught Steve’s bug; I had a feeling that we could defeat Bath City on the Monday too.

Saturday evening was spent basking in the glory of Frome’s victory, but my attention soon turned to the Sunday. This would be our new manager’s first league match at Stamford Bridge, and of course there was a frisson of excitement about this.

However – and you might want to look away now, dear reader – I had to solemnly admit to myself that the Frome vs. Bath game on the following day was the biggest of the three. Bath City have experienced a massive fall from grace of late. In 1979/80, in the inaugural season of the Alliance Premier – the first-ever national “fifth division” – they finished second. In that season, Bath City were only three levels below Chelsea.

They have always found themselves in Step 1 or Step 2 of the non-league pyramid, and they have always been a big non-league outfit. However, they now find themselves in Step 3 after relegation last season. While Bath have dropped, Frome have risen and the game would be the first league match between the two clubs since 1906.

Yes, 1906.

One hundred and twenty years.

But first Brighton.

I collected PD at 7am, and Parky at 7.30am. There was the usual early morning McBreakfast at Melksham on the way. These morning matchday football routines are lovely, and they hark back to my childhood when there seemed to be a very clear set of events that I used to follow. I mentioned those joyful Saturday mornings of my youth in the Luton Town match review; “Sesame Steet”, “The Partridge Family”, Sam Leitch on “Grandstand” with his football preview. But before I settled in for a few hours of football, I would be sent down to the village post office to pick up a loaf of bread, and with a small amount of change I would purchase one or maybe two packs of football cards – four per pack – that contained the absolutely inedible bubble gum.

Players from those days lie deep in my memory to this day.

David Wagstaffe – Wolverhampton Wanderers.

Alan Bloor – Stoke City.

Dick Krzywicki – Huddersfield Town.

Allan Hunter – Ipswich Town.

Sunday traffic was light; I dropped the passengers off near “The Eight Bells” at just before 10am. Joe from Virginia would soon join them, along with my good friends Even, Jon, Roy and Hans from Norway. I spun around and parked up on Rylston Road and walked down to Fulham Broadway. For fifteen minutes, I was in agony; my hips were killing me. Those carefree days of me in 1971/72, scampering down to the shop, were a long way away. I’d like to think that the pain I was experiencing was due to those mesmerizing twists and feints that used to confuse opposing full-backs – and myself – during my footballing days, to give it all some sort of footballing credibility, but I suspect that the shooting pain was just due to the passage of time and old age.

I stopped by at the “Walham Green” pub and sat for twenty minutes, nursing a drink. Miraculously, when I stood up, the pain had gone. Behold the therapeutic powers of Fulham Broadway.

On the train down to Putney Bridge, I spotted my Brighton mate Mac in another compartment. We met up on the platform and while he shot off for a quick bite to eat, I joined up with the lads in “The Eight Bells”; the time was about 11.30am.

Unlike the Fulham game, the pub was a lot less crowded, a lot more homely, and a lot quieter. There were familiar faces everywhere. I sat on a table with Mac’s fine mates Barry, Rob and Guy. Brighton have given us a torrid time of late; those recent three away games were absolutely horrific. There was a 1-3 defeat at Stamford Bridge last September too.

I asked Mac how the Brighton faithful will react to Danny Welbeck in Chelsea colours.

“We’ll be fine.”

“Ah lovely.”

Barry shared a photo of some old – literally – Chelsea faces that he had seen on a recent “Facebook” post. He wondered if I recognised any. All of them were in their ‘sixties and ‘seventies.

“Well, I can spot Eccles, but that’s about it. He was the leader of The Shed back in the day, or to be exact, the North Stand.”

I was inside Stamford Bridge at 1.30pm after having safely smuggled the SLR camera in.

On the pitch, Gary Chivers and Jason Cundy were being asked to share their memories of the recently departed Bobby Tambling and Ken Bates.

I always remember the first time I met Bobby Tambling; it was with Parky and Glenn at a local Wiltshire pub, when Ron Harris and Peter Bonetti were in attendance too. It was in April 2011. Outside in the pub garden, I remember Parky and Bobby chatting away like they were old friends. They were sharing anecdotes about their hip replacements, and Parky could not believe how pleasant Bobby was. That was a Friday evening, and we soon bumped into Bobby walking along Fulham Broadway the following morning before a game and he was all smiles and laughter; a truly wonderful man.

Kick-off time approached.

We checked the team.

New signing Emilio Martinez had made it just in time.

Martinez

Fofana – Lacroix – Colwill

Pedro Neto – Gusto – Lavia – Hato

Palmer – Joao Pedro – Rogers

This looked an odd selection with square pegs in round holes; the pushed-on wing backs and the midfield duo especially.

A Xabi Alonso tifo involving a puny pun was unveiled in The Shed and the teams arrived.

Then, floral tributes with members of the families of Bobby Tambling and Ken Bates – I spotted Bobby’s widow Val – and some heartwarming applause for the two Chelsea legends.

Chelsea attacked The Shed. It looked like many of the visiting support had opted for the white away shirts. Mac wasn’t too happy with the blue with thin white pinstripes of their home kit. In the pub I had asked him about it, narrowly avoiding a mention of the 1983 FA Cup final.

“Not a fan. Prefer stripes. Saw Rangers on TV recently, and their kit looks like ours.”

Chelsea began well. My SLR was at hand on just four minutes to record a brilliant start for the chaps.

The corner from Pedro Neto near Parkyville.

The perfect flick-on from Joao Pedro. He must have been watching highlight reels of Archie Ferris. The ball was blocked on the line by the defender Mats Weiffer and ‘keeper Bart Verbruggen made a hash of grasping the loose ball. The ball dropped nicely.

Alas, the camera missed the nimble flick-in from Romeo Lavia, his first goal for us, but my first reaction was to quickly check the linesman to my right, but his flag was kept down. No infringements.

GET IN.

I captured the celebrations, naughtily taking place in front of the away fans.

Alan : “THTCAUN.”

Chris : “COMLD.”

What a start. We continued to play some lovely stuff in the Brighton half.

On fourteen minutes, a throw-in from Jorrel Hato, a headed pass from Joao Pedro to Morgan Rogers, who shuffled past Mario Vuskovic. His square ball was pushed in by Neto on the six-yard line.

Beautiful stuff.

We were purring.

“We’ve got our Chelsea back” sang the crowd.

On twenty-four minutes, Neto chased down Feri Kadioglu and played the ball inside to Joao Pedro, but his shot – on film – was guided just past the left-hand stick.

On twenty-eight minutes, a rare Brighton attack but a hint of things to come. There were three attackers roaming at large down our left, with only one Chelsea shirt in sight.

“Fallen asleep there Chels.”

The resultant cross was thankfully claimed by Martinez.

Brighton then enjoyed a little spell.

However, on thirty-two minutes, there was a lovely interchange of play between Hato and Rogers – quick feet to release the ball – and this allowed Hato to race up the left. He won the footrace with Wieffer and crossed low. As the ball flew off Joao Pedro’s boot, I clicked.

GOAL!

This made up for the earlier miss.

I always remember Mac’s reaction to us signing Joao Pedro.

“Good luck with the sulky twat.”

I wondered, briefly, what his thoughts were as the scorer celebrated right in front of the Mac Lads.

This goal, oddly, brought back memories of Gary Chivers’ goal versus Newcastle United in October 1980. That one came from a rapid move down the left too. And, also oddly, Clive – a few seats along – thought the same. The ball travelled in different parts of the pitch in 2026, but it had the same feel as the goal from forty-six years ago.

Three-up and hinting at more, my mind wandered, far too quickly for my liking.

“Two wins in two games. Will this team surprise us all, gel ridiculously quickly and mount a serious challenge for the title?”

Yeah, I know.

Throughout all this attacking wizardry, Cole Palmer had been a little quiet. He gave away possession on a couple of occasions early on and didn’t dominate in the way he can.

On thirty-five minutes, Neto missed his challenge, allowing Diego Gomez in on goal. His shot was parried by Martinez – on film – but Malick Yalcouye slammed a shot in off the far post.

Bollocks.

On forty-one minutes, Rogers rifled a shot from distance just past the post. Gomez, at the Matthew Harding, headed wide.

At the break, I had no complaints, apart from the noise and the atmosphere.

It was darned quiet.

At half-time, a message from Mac.

“Exactly as I saw this going.”

The game recommenced, and Brighton managed to have a bigger share of the game. However, three minutes in, Martinez pumped a long first-time ball forward, enabling Joao Pedro to slalom his way forward – pictured – but he seemed to take one touch too many and his run was blocked.

On fifty-five minutes, a Brighton free-kick and a header at the back stick from Gomez that glided past the other post.

I was waiting for the net to bulge.

Phew.

A minute later, we went wide of the far post, then a minute after that Rogers walloped a ball into the six-yard box but Palmer uncharacteristically volleyed over the bar.

Then a couple of Brighton efforts, and a fine Martinez save. Sadly, from the resulting corner, Yalcouye played a ball in to Pascal Gross whose attempted pass to a teammate flew in off Joao Pedro’s leg.

There was still half-an-hour to go, and it was getting nervy. It felt that we were sitting back way too much. At 3-2, this was a different game completely.

On sixty-four minutes, Maxim De Cuyper headed wide of the far post.

Martinez saved well down low from Olivier Boscagli.

This was getting even more edgy.

On sixty-eight minutes, Xabi Alonso made some changes.

Josh Acheampong for Fofana.

Moises Caicedo for Neto.

Reece James for Lavia.

It meant that Gusto was pushed out wide.

The crowd responded with a loud, and much needed chant.

“CAREFREE.”

On seventy-two minutes, Pep Chavarria took over from Colwill.

Two minutes later, a throw-in from Gusto, a neat lay-off from Joao Pedro and Palmer raced forward. He ate up the yards and with calm efficiency he swept the ball in at the far post.

What a lovely strike.

Chelsea 4 Brighton 2.

That’s better.

More noise.

“PALMER AGAIN, PALMER AGAIN, PALMER AGAIN OLE, OLE.”

I said to Alan : “to be honest he has been 5/10 until now.”

Brighton continued to attack and carve out chances. One effort was slashed wide from a corner.

Sadly, Caicedo had to be replaced by Valentin Barco on eighty-two minutes.

Towards the end of the game, my fellow occupants in The Sleepy Hollow – Alan, Clive, PD – departed and so it was only me that witnessed the last goal of the game on ninety-five minutes. Another long throw, the ball was headed on, and a free header for Gross.

Thankfully, that was it.

The whistle blew soon after the re-start.

Phew.

There was some sort of gallows humour on the way out.

“3-2, now 4-3…I guess we will win 5-4 at Arsenal.”

No, don’t put any money on it.

It had been a game that started so well with lots off attacking verve, but one that soon became a roller-coaster ride like those experienced by thousands at Thorpe Park.

But Alonso will learn fast and make the right changes.

Won’t he?

Let’s hope so,

I made my way back to collect PD and Parky and who should I see talking to three friends on the Fulham Road?

Eccles.

I messaged Barry to tell him.

I reached home at around 6.45pm with another game heavily on my mind.

The plan was to meet up with a few close friends in the FTFC clubhouse at around 1pm on Bank Holiday Monday. I have a digital season ticket at Frome, and until this day, the scanning process had not worked. My old Oakfield Road School teammate Steve – manning the gate with his father Maurice – was surprised as I was when there was a lovely big green “tick” on his scanner. I took that as a positive sign.

There were Bath fans in early at Badgers Hill, and it soon became apparent that we would be witnessing the largest ever away following seen at Frome Town in decades and decades. I had spoken to a director a fortnight earlier and they had budgeted for an attendance of 1,000, expected 1,200, but I – and others – was hoping for 1,500 at least.

I soon met up with Louise, Steve, Francis, Tom and Glenn. We could not believe how many away fans were in. They began to cluster as one black mass in The Cowshed to our right. The weather had been favourable; there were grey skies in the morning – perhaps deterring many from travelling too far on this day’s holiday and enticing them to the match instead – but as from midday there were blue skies overhead.

As game time approached, Badgers Hill looked an absolute picture.

All stands were full; there were still spectators queuing at the turnstiles and a buzz of huge anticipation hung in the air.

The visitors had featured heavily in the local news of late; a consortium that included Tears For Fears’ Curt Smith were about to swell the coffers of the club to the quite amazing tune of £6M.

And here they were visiting little old Frome for the first time in a league game since 1906.

The teams strode onto the pitch to the tune of “A Town Called Malice” and we girded our loins.

The first half was a relatively mundane affair, and Frome Town had to rely on the heroics of ‘keeper Kyle Phillips to keep the score tied. With five minutes to the break, the last of the spectators eventually made their way in. We all played “guess the gate” and the consensus was around 1,700.

The second half began with the red shirts attacking us in the club end.

Eventually, the home support found our voices.

I bellowed out –

“COME ON YOU” – but stopped at saying the word “reds.”

I just can’t do it.

There were a few chances for both teams. Bath wasted a golden one-on-one; the chance of the match.

Frome manager Danny Greaves made some changes.

Three substitutions on sixty-four minutes.

Our play improved.

“AWAY THE DODGE, AWAY THE DODGE, AWAY THE DODGE, AWAY.”

Two more substitutions followed on eighty minutes.

Just after, a Warren Maidment throw-in (pictured), a scramble, and substitute George Dowling, with his first touch of the game, rifled the ball in via a deflection.

GET IN.

He had only been on the pitch for less than twenty seconds.

The home team held on, and the away fans sloped back to Twerton, Weston, Lansdown, Odd Down, Bathampton and Whiteway.

The gate was announced as 2,051.

We had smiles as large as Cley Hill, a local landmark that can be spotted on the horizon if you know where to look.

We basked in the glory some more.

I was worried about winning a solitary point in this toughest of weekends, but Frome Town had won six.

And good old Chelsea had picked up three too.

Fackinell.

Three wins out of three.

What a blinkin’ glorious weekend.

And here’s to many more.

See you at Arsenal

Game One : Chertsey Town vs. Frome Town

Game Two : Chelsea vs. Brighton And Hove Albion

Game Three : Frome Town vs. Bath City

Tales From The Fast Show

Chelsea vs. Luton Town : 27 August 2026.

Xabi Alonso’s first competitive game was behind him, and his first competitive game at Stamford Bridge was a League Cup encounter with Luton Town.

When the draw was made a few weeks ago, I wasn’t completely convinced that I would attend. This first week of the football season was going to be busy enough, with three Frome Town games and two Chelsea games from Saturday 22 August through to Monday 31 August; that’s five games in ten days. Did I really want to squeeze in another?

One of my main aims this season is to see if I can complete my fifth consecutive season of complete league fixtures; a run of 190 games. It would be quite some achievement and something that I would never ever have contemplated doing way back in my formative Chelsea years. Was I that fussed about missing an early League Cup game? Apparently not. After all, I have chosen to miss the occasional home game – invariably midweek – in past seasons, so one more game would not matter too much in the grand scheme of things.

Our new manager’s first home game was the friendly against Real Sociedad a couple of weeks ago, and on that day, Frome Town were at Havant & Waterlooville, aiming for a third consecutive league win. There was absolutely no way that I was missing that one.

However, as I thought about it, and as the decent price of £29 was announced, I threw caution to the wind and bought my ticket for the Luton tie. PD and Parky were keen to go too.

In the end, it would be rude not to.

Count me in.

It would now be a run of six games in ten days.

Back with a bang, eh?

Of course, there was a pre-season that centered on Australia and South-East Asia in July to kick things off for Alonso. I was certainly not tempted with that, despite gorgeous memories of Thailand and Malaysia in 2011, China in 2017 and Australia in 2018, but I saw the highlights of a few of those matches. Our first game of Alonso’s reign was against Western Sydney Warriors on 28 July; a match that ended 6-4 to Chelsea. I remember glancing at some of the unfamiliar names in our squad that night and some looked like particularly difficult selections of letters in a game of Scrabble.

Since those early days of 2026/27, Alonso has added to his squad. We have opted for a couple of old hands to add experience to the legion of “youngsters with potential” after the realisation that teams don’t “win with kids” too often became all too apparent last season. The acquisition of our perennial nemesis Danny Welbeck – I’ve lost count of the goals he nabbed for Brighton against us – was well received by me. However, our club’s desire to add Jordan Henderson to the mix was hard for me to swallow. I was aghast when he was named in the England squad in the US, and I could hardly believe that he was to join us at Chelsea. At the time it boiled down to Henderson, ex-Liverpool, or Xhaka, ex-Arsenal; neither to my taste. But then people spoke of Henderson’s role in helping to instil good practices in the squad environment and his leadership qualities.

Maybe he will turn out to be a Captain Mainwaring rather than a Corporal Sponge in the new army of players at Stamford Bridge this season.

We wondered if he might be involved against Luton.

At work the day after the Fulham game, several colleagues mentioned to me that they had enjoyed the match. This surprised me in a way. When I met up with the lads after the match on Monday night I had quickly judged the game as being 6/10, since it contained a mixture of performances. I think it was too close a result for me to enjoy it more and score it higher. Yet the neutrals had enjoyed the end-to-end passages of play, and why not? Perhaps I was being too harsh.

I worked another 6am to 2pm shift, but the commute up to my secondary place of work was hit by delays on the M4. On the raised section of this road at around Brentford’s stadium, I glanced at the shining arch of Wembley (a grim destination for us these days) six miles to the north and I also managed to spot the thin metallic needle of the Crystal Palace TV transmitter on the rise of high land around twelve miles to the south-east; the first-time that I had ever spotted it. This stunned me. I have seen over nine-hundred games at Stamford Bridge (and this means I surely must have visited London at least a thousand times in my life) yet I had not spied that spire ever before from the M4. It just goes to show that London never stops surprising me.

What with the delays, I didn’t drop the boys off outside “The Wolfpack” until 5pm. I revisited “Koka” again, then amazed myself by bumping into many Chelsea friends on the short walk down the North End Road. I then met up with PD, Parky, Jimmy the Greek and Salisbury Steve at “Tommy Tucker.”

We saw the team; Mike Penders, Valentin Barco and Danny Welbeck were debuting.

“Where do you think you are going, Sponge?”

Jordan Henderson wasn’t even on the bench. Perhaps he would be preparing the half-time energy drinks, checking the towels, or other light duties.

Rain was threatening with dark clouds overhead, and I only stayed a short while. There were a couple of photos on the walk to The Bridge (thanks for the photo, Jimmy; a rare snap taken by someone other than little old me and shared herein) and I was inside Stamford Bridge at just after 7pm. My phone would have to suffice for photos again and I apologise now.

Despite the cheap price of tickets, there were gaps everywhere. With around 4,500 Luton supporters in The Shed – to the west side – Parky was now repositioned alongside PD, and I was next to Alan.

With ten minutes to kick-off, “Our House” was played and I smiled. I was glad that I chose to attend this one.

Many of the away supporters were bedecked in the orange home shirt and I liked this flash of colour. Their kit has changed quite often over the years, and when we played them at Wembley in 1994, their first-choice kit was white shirts and light blue socks for some reason. I always like the orange and black combo.

At kick-off, many seats around us were unused.

We attacked The Shed.

First thoughts; four at the back this time?

Yes, it seemed so.

Mike Penders

Malo Gusto – Josh Acheampong – Maxence Lacroix – Pep Chavarria

Reece James – Valentin Barco

Estevao Willian – Cole Palmer – Morgan Rogers

Danny Welbeck

Former Chelsea youth Kasey Palmer was in the Luton team.

It was all Chelsea for the first five, ten, fifteen, twenty minutes. There were a couple of rare forays into our half for Luton early on – enthusiastically cheered by the Hatters’ support – but they did not threaten at all. They sat deep, unsurprisingly.

Nerdspeak : “Luton had a low block.”

Immediately, we were passing quicker, moving quicker, finding gaps quicker. I immediately felt happier watching this style of football.

It was still Chelsea, but faster.

The bright ginger hair of Barco seemed to make him stand out and I could not help concentrating on our young Argentinian starlet. He immediately looked neat and purposeful.

After around ten minutes, the setting sun behind the West Stand caused the steel of the East Stand and the sand brickwork of the hotel above the stand to obtain a surreal terracotta blush. The photo I took of the Chelsea lion has not been altered; it really was that orange. It gave the Stamford Bridge stadium an ethereal glow.

The orange Luton jerseys, on the pitch and in The Shed, the orange tint to the surroundings, and the deep ginger mop on Barco’s head. It was all in synch.

On eleven minutes, a sublime shimmy and run from Cole Palmer, following a pass from Estevao, squeezed in among combatants in the Luton box, thrilled us all but his shot was blocked by the ‘keeper Josh Keeley, and his follow-up effort was saved too.

From the corner, Palmer’s shot went wide. Malo Gusto shot wildly over, and then Welbeck headed at Keeley from close range.

On eighteen minutes, a well-struck free kick from Reece James was saved very well by the Luton ‘keeper, at full stretch to his left.

This was nice stuff from Chelsea. We were playing with ease, and it all looked very smooth. Gone was the reticence of previous eras in the recent past. There were purrs of delight among the SW6 loyalists.

Thankfully, Stamford Bridge had filled considerably but there were still tons of empty seats. I had seen that 49,000 had attended the Tottenham vs. Charlton game the previous night in the same competition; an impressive number. I wondered if we might get up to 35,000; I suspected not.

Barco continued to impress. He kept the ball moving but not in the ponderous way of Jorginho. His touch was light, and he played passes with an unerring calmness, and with pin-point accuracy. I bizarrely spotted the likeness to Danny Bonadeuce of “The Partridge Family” from those joyful Saturday mornings of my youth; “Sesame Steet”, “The Partridge Family”, Sam Leitch on “Grandstand” with his football preview.

I had just mentioned to Alan, who lives close to the Crystal Palace mast, that the visitors had not enjoyed a single effort on Penders’ goal, when a minute or so later, a shot came in from an angle down below us but was blocked.

On thirty-eight minutes, Barco slid a fine ball to meet a beautifully timed run into the box from Estevao, just beating the offside line, and this resulted in a shot that was whipped low across the goal, but which went wide of the far post.

It was hard to believe that we had not scored in this half of football. But there were no catcalls, nor boos. We could all see that this was an improvement in a playing style; the quality of opposition notwithstanding.

Dear reader : it was such a bloody relief.

In the first portion of the half, Estevao and Palmer had looked sensational, combining well, and full of tricks. Again, lovely to witness.

I had mentioned to Alan earlier : “It’s the Estevao show tonight, mate” and, at that very moment, he double-touched the ball as he stumbled and it went out for a goal-kick. I need to learn when to keep my gob shut.

In the last few five minutes of the half, however, I whispered to Alan “we have plateaued a bit.” We had lost a little zip of energy. Passes were taking a little longer to be made.

With that, a Luton free-kick, and a header from Hakeem Odoffin was on target but Penders easily claimed it.

On forty-four minutes, Estevao was the creator again as he set up Morgan Rogers, otherwise relatively quiet, but his volley smacked against the bar.

Nice interplay between Chavarria and Rogers set up Palmer, but another blocked shot.

It had been a night, thus far, of almost total domination, but it was 0-0 as the half came to an end. Lacroix had impressed me; physically strong, pacey, and happy to make decisions quickly. Alongside him, Josh continued to look a fine prospect.

At the break, I messaged some pals in the US :

“The players look like they know what they need to do. Bit of a radical approach to be honest.”

Five minutes into the second period, Estevao played a decisive pass that allowed the overlapping Gusto – our least-effective player thus far – to punch a super cross over and onto the head of a leaping Welbeck.

GOAL.

A trademark Welbeck goal.

Fantastic.

How he loved celebrating that one.

Alan looked at me.

I looked at him.

We both fidgeted with our glasses, Eric Morecambe-style.

“They’ll have to come at us now.”

“Come on my little diamonds.”

Lovely stuff.

We could relax, or could we?

Possibly not. A Luton equaliser, however unlikely, might mean that we would go into penalties right after the final whistle.

Barco continued his fine debut; receiving, a touch, a pass, on target, always. He reminded me of the light-footed Billy Gilmour with his economy of movement.

On the hour, Welbeck’s shot rolled just wide of the far post. Four minutes later, great shape from Palmer, but his beautifully struck shot skimmed the very top of the crossbar.

Three minutes later, a rare effort on Penders’ goal, a low drive from the other Palmer, but just wide.

Throughout this game, the atmosphere had not been too special. The away fans were hardly a wall of noise, but they kept producing a prime piece of glottal-stop English.

“Come on Lu’on, Come on Lu’on.”

They also quaintly sang of their rivals not as bastards or worse, but as just “Hornets.”

Bless.

Chelsea were quiet.

Shocker.

On sixty-seven minutes, some substitutions.

Jorrel Hato for Gusto.

Romeo Lavia for James.

Pedro Neto for Rogers.

On seventy-three minutes another.

Joao Pedro for Welbeck.

Or rather on seventy-four minutes; our punishment as Welbeck did not sprint off the pitch.

With ten minutes to go, Barco surprisingly lost the ball but soon wrestled the ball back and guided the ball to Palmer, who passed to Estevao outside. A shimmy, a shot at goal, but the unlucky Odoffin was in the way and could not divert the ball from going in.

Chelsea 2 Luton Town 0.

Phew.

Just after, Jamie Gittens replaced Steve-O.

Late on, Barco played the ball over to Acheampong but his header dropped just wide of the far post.

On ninety-minutes, a fine phase of possession football in and around their box, and an eventual shot from Joao Pedro that was blocked.

Then a moment later, a strong run from Gittens down below me but he smacked the post with a firm drive.

We should have won 5-0 really.

But I enjoyed this game. I saw glimpses of a fine future.

So, we play Leeds United at home in the next round, and a game that will be our eighth consecutive match in London. Just like Luton, we seem to avoid Leeds for years and years, but then play them again and again.

I think the atmosphere will be better for that one.

I met up with Parky and PD outside “The Mitre” at 9.45pm, and – an earlier one on this occasion – I was home at 12.30am exactly. It had been a smashing night of football.

Next up, another home match; Brighton on Sunday at 2pm.

I will see you there.

DAVE McCROSSEN.

Before the photos, a plug for my friend Dave McCrossen and his newly published tome, which covers last season’s slog, and is available on Amazon via book or Kindle. I have just bought my copy, and it promises to be a good read.

Us Chelsea matchday-going bloggers have to look after each other; there are only two of us.

Tales From A Home Away From Home

Fulham vs. Chelsea : 24 August 2026

The 2026/27 season was upon us. All the other Premier League games had taken place from Friday to Sunday, leaving just us and our near neighbours Fulham to go. An away game alongside the River Thames at Craven Cottage on a Monday night seemed appropriate considering all the other matches that were to take place in London over the next few weeks. Chelsea are set to play no less than seven consecutive matches in the capital, in league and cup; our first game outside the M25 at Everton will not be until Saturday 17 October. It seems miles away.

So, on this Monday night, everything close, everything to hand, everything in the Borough of Hammersmith and Fulham, everything in Fulham, everything in SW6. Everything nice and cosy. There was no need to even change the pre-match meet up; “The Eight Bells” was showing its other side on this occasion, an away pub and not a home one.

Everything was familiar. It was like being home away from home.

At the end of last season, after that depressing defeat at Sunderland, the summer stretched out in front of me, but although the World Cup was followed by many, it wasn’t for me. For the second time in a row, after Qatar in 2022, I boycotted the goings-on in North America. My main area of concern was the pricing structure of the games. How could anyone at FIFA claim that it was just and right to charge such extortionate prices? I was out for that main reason, but there were others too. In a nutshell viewed the tournament, ridiculously expanded to forty-eight countries, as out of reach of the common fan. God knows how those from around the world afforded it; my guess is that they would face huge bills to pay off on their return.

The FIFA World Cup 2026 and me would be like ships that passed in the night; one a mega cruise ship, ugly and brutal, churning up the waves as it gouged its way forwards and little old me on a one-man raft fighting the tides.

But then, to my shame, I buckled and decided to cave in, and I watched England vs. Argentina in the semi-final. England lost and I was morally bankrupt. I was not happy with myself for a few days after.

However, with no competition, Frome Town stole a march on my affections during the summer. First, we celebrated the wonderful news that the football club had agreed a two-year deal with the Frome Town Council, meaning that the club was locked-in and able to build for the future. All this just a year after it looked like the club, in its current form, might fold. The first of nine Frome Town games – five pre-season matches and four Southern Premier League games – took place just five miles away at Radstock Town on a beautiful sunny evening, my birthday, on Monday 6 July. I have utterly enjoyed watching my local team play in all these games, and my travels have already taken me to Devon, Worcestershire and Hampshire.

It was so noticeable that the release of Frome’s fixtures took place the day before the England vs. Argentina semi-final, and I was looking forward to the new fixtures one-hundred times more than the game in Atlanta.

As the summer continued, and as Frome began the league season with two wins but then two losses, I found myself well-and-truly entrenched in the Frome Town story, and Chelsea seemed somewhat distant. I was – I am not afraid to admit – a little concerned about my ambivalence. And then, just as I was nearing my place of work at Bowerhill near Melksham at around 5.45am on the day of the Fulham game my mind drifted to me being in the packed Putney End at Craven Cottage, cheering on the team, living every kick of the game, maybe witnessing some lovely skill by Cole Palmer or Joao Pedro, and I was back. I was back in the game.

I shouldn’t have worried about a thing.

Because every little thing was going to be alright.

I worked an early shift and, at 2pm, the familiar faces of Glenn Parkins and Paul Daniels were spotted in the front car park. As we set off to London, we updated each other with our stories from the summer.

The previous season will not sit well in our collective memories. It was a tough grind, with few high spots. There was the inevitable double over Tottenham, but other highlights were rare. My favourite away trip was the one to Wrexham; a new ground, a topsy-turvy game, a trip to the past.

Just before it had begun, of course, we had become World Champions. At the time it did not dawn on me how significant it all was from my timeline perspective.

1905 : Chelsea were formed.

1965 : I was born.

2025 : World Champions on my sixtieth birthday year and the club’s one-hundred and twentieth anniversary.

I liked that.

On the drive to London, we briefly spoke about Chelsea’s chances under new manager Xabi Alonso. Are many of the other main protagonists well-formed teams? I would suggest not. This is an odd period in the history of the topflight of English football. It seems that many teams are “works in progress”, including ours. Although a team from North London are firm favourites, I am tempted to use a phrase from their past to describe the race for this year’s title.

“It’s up for grabs now.”

I am looking at a top four finish; this squad does have huge potential. With a strong start, who knows? 2026/27 is the tenth anniversary of 2016/17 after all.

I met up with Joe from Virginia at ”Koka” on the North End Road; a favourite of mine. He has been a Chelsea supporter for around thirty years and is a good friend. We shared our thoughts of the game ahead over a couple of pepperoni pizzas. I then drove us down to deepest Fulham and tried my best to locate a parking spot equidistant from the ground and the pub. I eventually found a space on Wardo Road. It had been a tough consignment though; I hoped that gaps in our defence were equally scarce later on.

“The Eight Bells” was rammed full of Chelsea, and we were unfortunately not allowed to stand outside with our drinks. The pub was crowded, stifling hot, and I wasn’t unduly happy when PD announced that the lads were about to walk up to Craven Cottage. Just before we left, Tommie from California arrived. I last saw him at Bramall Lane towards the end of 2024/25. He was visiting with both his parents and a mate from home.

It was just after 7pm.

The team had been announced while we were stood in the pub, hopping from one foot to the other to get out of the way of passers-by.

Robert Sanchez

Levi Colwill – Maxence Lacroix – Josh Acheampong

Malo Gusto – Reece James – Romeo Lavia – Jorrel Hato

Cole Palmer – Joao Pedro – Morgan Rogers

So, debuts for Lacroix and Rogers, but the team had a few surprises.

I was pleased Josh was in, and a big game for him.

Gusto at right wing-back, Reece tucked-in.

“Where’s Caicedo?”

“Not sure about the defence”

We walked through a glade of trees, with the evening sun cutting through the branches to the west over the river, and I am not so sure I have ever seen Bishop’s Park looking so photogenic. I wished that I had packed my SLR to do justice to everything, but I did not fancy risking it, so I was to make do with just my ‘phone for this game.

I can understand why Fulham is high-up on the list of favourite away games.

It didn’t take us too long to reach the familiar turnstiles on Stevenage Road. I said “adios” to Joe who had purchased a ticket in the top tier of their new Riverside Stand. He was able to do this because he had once bought a ticket a while back to a Fulham game and so was in their system. It was as easy as that. He wasn’t a Fulham member or anything. It seems it’s easier to obtain tickets for one club in SW6 and not the other these days.

It was lovely to be among the faithful once again as I slowly edged my way towards section P5. There were “hello mate” acknowledgements to many. I, indeed, was back.

I was in Row H, near the front, and I soon met up with Gal, John and Alan. I had been on my Jack Jones at Sunderland, so it was fantastic to be next to them again. Jason from Swanage was right behind me, Calvin from Brighton was right in front of me. There were waves and nods to many others.

Fantastic.

I comforted myself with the knowledge that because the rake of the terrace steps at Fulham is, like at Selhurst Park, so shallow, I rarely managed to get any decent shots with my SLR camera in any case. Oh well. I just needed to concentrate on other things and not match action. I was sure I’d cope.

It’s a great stadium at Fulham. There’s lots to admire. It’s neat and has its share of unique features. It is, however, still hard to fathom that London’s oldest club has won bugger all since 1879.

Before we knew it, a pre-match song by AC/DC was aired and it seemed totally incongruous. Something by Tommy Steele would have been more appropriate.

Flames and then fireworks were let off into the night in front of Joe and the Riverside Stand to my left, and the two sets of players strode across the pitch from the Cottage in the corner to the dug outs. Sulphur hung in the air.

I took a few photos. I surely couldn’t miss with those.

How strange that the two former Liverpool teammates Xabi Alonso and Álvaro Arbeloa found their way to be managing clubs a mile and a half apart via short stays in charge of arguably the biggest club in the world Real Madrid.

“There’s nowt so queer as football” as nobody has ever said.

The Fulham fans, it seemed, had been given white and black scarves to hold aloft. In front of their Hammersmith End, banners said this :

“HAVE BEEN. WILL BE. ALWAYS ORIGINAl.”

Um, what?

I always liked the fact that Fulham’s old telegram address was “Fulhamish” (Chelsea’s was “Chelstam”) because it conjured up images of a rough-and-tumble amateurish way of doing things, quite befitting the club in the days of Tommy Trinder.

Well, on this night, those banners were plain gibberish.

We stood and waited.

Before the match, the players stood at the centre-circle. An image of Kevin Keegan appeared on the screen above the Hammersmith End.

There was applause even before the referee blew his whistle.

We have lost some special people over the summer.

Bobby Tambling – one of the most genuine and decent human beings that I have ever met – passed away on 3 June. He was such a lovely man that his scoring prowess could well be overlooked. It was a pleasure to know him. He will always be a true Chelsea legend.

Ken Bates – the irascible former Chelsea chairman – passed away on 11 July. I loved the way that Ken stood up for us on so many occasions. Bates and Chelsea were indivisible during his twenty-one years in charge. He fought for our cause and formed the CPO, his greatest ever decision. I still treasure the letter that he wrote to me in the summer of 1982.

Franco Baresi – along with Franz Beckenbauer and Bobby Moore, one of the greatest three central defenders of all-time – passed away on 31 July. I sadly never saw him play, but what a consummate defender. There are numerous stories of players swapping shirts with him after games, and his shirt always used to smell of Armani aftershave rather than the blood, sweat and tears of others.

And, of course, Kevin Keegan, who sadly left us on 20 July. Outside of Chelsea, he was my favourite player growing up. He remains my favourite England international. Not my favourite English player – Osgood, Wilkins, Lampard, Terry – but my favourite player during England games. Does that make sense? How I salivated at the rumours of him joining Chelsea from Hamburg in 1980. I loved his drive, his enthusiasm, his passion. How I loved seeing him play for Southampton in 1981. And then again in those two seasons with Newcastle United when he was regarded as a messiah. I was lucky enough to meet him twice; the second time in the tunnel before a game at Chelsea in 1995. He was so loved by everyone. His death, aged seventy-five, hit me so very hard.

The Fulham and Chelsea supporters clapped non-stop for him. He was the Fulham manager from 1997 to 1999.

RIP.

Eight o’clock approached.

First thoughts?

That kit looks bloody fantastic. What a beautiful shade of royal blue.

“Be even better with white socks, Gal.”

Cole Palmer kicked off, and I spent a few moments taking it all in, the formation, who was where, looking over at Alonso, talking to Gary. As the ball was headed up field by a Chelsea defender, there was a split-second when I thought to myself “which way are we playing?” It was clear that my mind had been working in several different dimensions for a few seconds.

The ball reached Palmer, and in a fluid moment of consummate skill, he played the ball forward to Joao Pedro. A clipped lob over Bernd Leno and the net rippled.

Fackinell.

The Putney End roared. I punched the air. I screamed.

Yes, I was back.

After the dust had settled – “what was that, thirty-seconds, Gal?” – Alan looked over towards me, smiling.

“They’ll have to come at us now.”

“Come on my little diamonds.”

We were both back.

And so were Chelsea.

This was a dream start down by the river.

“And it’s super Chelsea. Super Chelsea FC. We’re by far the greatest team the world has ever seen.”

Then a super loud “One man went to mow.”

I wondered if this was heard on the TV and if some folk, new to us, wondered why on earth we were singing that.

More songs.

“It’s Salomon!”

We dominated the early play but over the course of the first half, both teams had spells. Fulham were especially potent on the break, and the combination of Oscar Bobb and Josh King on their right continually tested us.

Upfront, we were playing with much more speed than before. The front three immediately looked a handful. There were shots from Rogers and Palmer.

This was, mainly, promising stuff.

But Fulham continued to worry us. Long bombs from Leno caused occasional panic.

Gary : “We almost scored too quick.”

Sanchez blocked a shot that was hit straight at him.

On twenty-four minutes, angled passing set King free and he approached where I was standing, no more than twenty-five yards away. A shot on target followed, but I hoped that Sanchez could cope. I only saw heads of those in front, but I heard the roar from the home fans.

Fackinell.

They had tied it at 1-1.

“Did it beat Sanchez the near post, Gal?”

Gal is shorter than me; he didn’t know.

The replay was shown on the screens; the Chelsea fans groaned.

Yep, beaten at the near post.

Bloody hell, Sanchez.

Fulham came at us again. We had to rely on some last-ditch defending. We had drifted badly, like a rowing boat on the Thames with no cox.

On the half-hour, sublime pace from Palmer set up Joao Pedro but his snatched volley flew wide.

Another break and another shot followed.

“COME ON CHELS.”

Efforts on goal at both ends soon tallied up. Fulham certainly looked dangerous and at times our defence looked shaky. I kept saying to myself “it’ll take time for it to gel.”

Another shot from the home team.

Gary : “They’ve had more chances than us.”

Me : They have.”

And with that insightful dialogue completed, just five seconds later Palmer beautifully set up Lacroix who had steamed ahead and in turn pulled the ball back for Rogers to steady himself and blast home.

GET IN.

The payers celebrated and the Chelsea crowd too.

A version of the “Just Can’t Get Enough / Timo Werner” chant, adapted for the scoring-debutant, was aired and lasted well into the half-time break.

Palmer whistled a shot narrowly past the post.

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH.”

All was good in the Putney End; we were 2-1 up at the break.

However, I did sense that there might well be more goals on show in the second forty-five minutes.

“This could end up 3-3, Gal.”

Soon into the second period, Palmer raced through past various Fulhamish defenders but his effort was wide (I think – I could not see.)

Just after, on forty-nine minutes, a quick move from Sanchez to Rogers to Joao Pedro, who waited for Palmer on the overlap.

He moved the ball on and drew the ‘keeper. The crowd roared. It was 3-1. No, I didn’t see the goal.

Thankfully the celebrations took place in front of me – on the run in, I loved the “cold” Palmer celebrations from Rogers and Reece – and my phone went into bloody tourist overdrive.

Some turned out to be OK.

“OH XABI ALONSO. OH XABI ALONSO.”

Sadly, just five minutes later it was 3-2. Sanchez blocked a first effort Timothy Castagne but the ball looped back for Gonzalo García to head home.

3-2.

Blimey.

On sixty-five minutes, Alonso made some subs.

A debut for Pep Chavarria who replaced Hato and Enzo Fernandez replaced Lavia.

Yes, there were boos for Enzo; mainly from the home end, but a few from within our support.

I quickly nailed my colours to the wall.

“OH ENZO FERNANDEZ. OH ENZO FERNANDEZ.”

There were many more cheers than jeers.

The game continued on, and it became a little nervy.

More substitutions followed.

76 minutes : Pedro Neto for Gusto.

82 minutes : a debut for Geovany Quenda who replaced Morgan Rogers.

83 minutes : Estevao for Palmer.

There were efforts at both ends of the pitch and we had a goal called-back for offside after Quenda strayed too far forward before releasing Joao Pedro who found the net.

There was a massive sigh of relief at the end of the four added minutes.

Phew.

I soon made my way out of the packed stand and I spotted Tommie with his parents; they had loved it.

I walked back to the car, aching all over. I had been on my feet for four hours. This football lark sure takes it out of you.

I picked up PD and Parks at 10.30pm on Finlay Road and I eventually made it home at 1.15am.

It was too tight a game for me to fully enjoy it, and our defence needs tightening up. Sanchez needs a whole book written about him.

Next up, the trips to London continue.

Thursday : Chelsea vs. Luton Town.

Saturday : Chertsey Town vs, Frome Town.

Sunday : Chelsea vs. Brighton & Hove Albion.

I will see some of you somewhere.

Walking Ahead To Season 2026/27

Fulham vs. Chelsea

Kevin Keegan RIP

The First Nine Games Of My Season

Radstock Town vs. Frome Town

Buckland Athletic vs. Frome Town

Frome Town vs. Worthing

Frome Town vs. Salisbury

Frome Town vs. Weymouth

Frome Town vs. Wimborne Town

Frome Town vs. Evesham United

Havant And Waterlooville vs. Frome Town

Frome Town vs. Gosport Borough

Tales From A Weary End To The Season

Sunderland vs. Chelsea : 24 May 2026.

“World champions but.”

I wonder if this colloquial phrase was used by any natives of the North-East as Chelsea’s visit to the Stadium of Light neared. With both teams seeking a win to finish the season on a high, and a potential Europa League place in 2026/27, I wonder if a Sunderland supporter dismissed our chances of a win against the Black Cats, only to be reprimanded by a friend who, looking at the undoubted talent in our team, and the events of last July, piped-up to remind them that Chelsea are, indeed, World Champions.

“Chelsea are rubbish, man.”

“Hadaway, they are World Champions but.”

This momentous weekend had started early. I just about managed to finish off the Tottenham blog on Thursday evening before grabbing a modicum of sleep. I was up at 3.30am and picked up Salisbury Steve at PD’s house in Frome at 5am. This was to be a bank holiday weekend, and I needed to avoid any traffic hold-ups.

I drove out to Beckington to take the A36 to Bath and then the road north and soon saw some bloody magpies, again, at the bottom of Bonnyleigh Hill. This obsession was getting silly.

Two magpies, though.

Obviously, I looked on this as a token of good luck.

We then had a little in-car discussion about black cats and debated whether it was good or bad luck for black cats to cross your path. I always thought that they were bad luck. I had always presumed that this nickname evolved when Sunderland moved out of Roker Park and needed to discard their “Roker Men” moniker and chose “Black Cats” as a new nickname, since the team would bring bad luck on other teams. However, it all seemed too contrived for my liking.

Anyway, we would be venturing into the land of Newcastle magpies and Sunderland black cats, and it would hopefully be a weekend to relax with mates, and to unwind a little. This has been a struggle of a season.

For the first few hours, The Chuckle Bus was awash with laughs and giggles, stories and tales, but everything then settled down. The passengers occasionally drifted off. I drove on.

Rather than the usual and monotonous drive up the M1 and A1, I fancied a change and hoped PD and Steve would too; I stayed on the M5 and then hit the M6 all the way to Carlisle. This enabled me to stop off at Tebay, my favourite services in the UK, where I indulged in a full breakfast that gloriously included haggis, black pudding and bubble. The scenery was indeed spectacular with the mountains of the Lake District visible to the west.

Then, the A69 east and into Newcastle, where the three of us were staying at a house that was close to St. James’ Park. On the drive in, we stopped at “The Denton” and then “The Fox & Hounds” to soak up the time until the digs’ check-in time of 2pm was reached.

After a quick change and freshen up, we embarked on a six-pub tour of Gateshead, mirroring the smaller crawl that we did just over a year ago.

“The Lock & Quay” on the river with amazing views of the bridges, but also a boorish rugby team from Bristol on tour.

“Axis” in the railway quarter at the top of the hill, and we just about coped with some difficult craft lagers.

“Microbar” close by, a return visit, and a lovely chat with Alan, a Gateshead supporter who had flown down to Bristol to see “The Heed’s” game at Yeovil over the winter.

“Station East”, another return visit, and we spent some time here, where we met two young Sunderland supporters, Kai and Rachel, and listened to a seventy-seven-year-old musician belt out some cracking songs. We were joined at this pub by Dave who is a regular at virtually all Chelsea games and has not missed a home game since 1994.

Kai told us a true shaggy dog story about a friend who raced greyhounds. This dog was a flier and showed great promise. Before its first race, though, the nefarious owner wanted to play tricks. So, he fed the dog Mars bars, which the dog lapped up, to dampen its speed so that the odds would drift for a second race.

This trick didn’t work.

It won.

The owner was confused but obviously pleased that the dog performed so well despite being penalized. So, they let the dog eat normal food, put lots of money on it, but it finished last.

So, they were confused what to do.

In the third race, out came the Mars bars, and the dog won again.

By now, the dog had earned the nickname “The Mars Bar Kid” and although Kai’s story continued, by now we were howling so much that we weren’t paying much attention.

“Another Budvar please, barman.”

Both youngsters were in their mid-twenties and so had not seen Sunderland play in Europe. Kai virtually pleaded with me to let Sunderland win on the Sunday. It’s hard to believe that a club with the magnitude of Sunderland had only previously enjoyed one season in Europe as a reward for their 1-0 FA Cup win in 1973 against Leeds United.

I was digging in though; I have never wanted to see Chelsea lose a game, and I wasn’t going to start here. I was looking for a win on Sunday, no doubts. There was talk of us having a year off from Europe to re-set and refresh, but so many of us love the European away trips.

“The Central” was close by, another return visit, and this time we made it to the rooftop terrace. Alas the view was not of the river and Newcastle, but of the rail tracks and Gateshead.

“The Grey Nag’s Head” was our final call, another return visit from last year, and I cannot deny nor confirm that a rendition of “Rotterdam (Or Anywhere)” by a female pub singer was hijacked by the four of us.

It had been a splendid night.

On the Saturday morning, we rested well.

But there were old friends to meet, and hopefully new places to hit.

At about 2pm, the three of us started off at “The Slug & Lettuce” on the quayside, a favourite for many years, and we had a bite to eat, our first food since Tebay. Here we were joined by Jimmy the Greek, Ian and Ian’s son Bobby.  

After a few hours, we made our way to “The Bridge Tavern” which sits right under the span of the Tyne Bridge. We had not visited this one for a few years. It was here that Jimmy spoke about his one game for England schoolboys. We really liked this pub, dark and quiet. However, our peace would not last too long; we were joined at our table by a bevy of local Geordie women on a sixtieth birthday pub crawl.

Then, next door to “Akenside Traders”, a very familiar bar in the epicentre of the quayside, but it was surprisingly quiet for a change. By now our entourage was roaring with laughter virtually every time one of us spoke. Good times.

Next, over the road to “The Crown Posada” at around 7.30pm, the evening racing on. This is a classic Tyneside bar, narrow but with a high ceiling, leather seats and gorgeous stained-glass windows. We were joined here by Karl, originally from London, but now living on Tyneside. His local was the first bar we frequented on the Friday, out in the west of the city.

At around 8pm, we walked a few yards up the hill to “Colonel Porter’s Emporium”, a big favourite and packed with locals and visitors alike. Here, the final two friends joined us. Johnny Twelve and Jenny Dozen flew in from California and soon entered the spirit of the night. This was Jenny’s first visit to the Loony Toon. As I posted on Facebook –

‘Seeing my mates sing along to “Dancing Queen” takes my love for them to another level. Howay.’

We decided to hit one last location before calling it a night and caught an Uber up the steep hill to “Stack” on Pilgrim Street. This cavernous bar was a perfect location for us to continue drinking and singing to one dodgy song after the other.

At about midnight, we called it a night, and we made our way back to our respective residences.

The last matchday of season 2025/26 soon arrived.

The six of us hurriedly met up at “The Beehive” on the Bigg Market in Newcastle at around 11.30am. Thankfully I was nursing only the slightest of hangovers and was able to slowly drink a pint of “Cruzcampo” but I knew that this would not be a day of excess.

There had been two consecutive days and nights “on the ale” in Gateshead and Newcastle on Friday and Saturday, and with a long drive home for me on the Monday, Sunday was all about seeing out the football season without too much alcohol. In fact, that tasty pint in “The Beehive” would be my only drink that day, save for a couple of “Diet Cokes” that don’t really count.

We took a train from Newcastle Central but we didn’t land in Sunderland until around 1.30pm. As we headed up Fawcett Street, I heard a familiar voice.

“We must stop meeting like this.”

It was Stuart, from Kilmersdon, the village so close to my village of Mells in Somerset. I had bumped into him outside Anfield, and at Fulham Broadway, in the past few weeks. And here he was again. We looked up and saw some other friends at a table outside a cheap and cheerful café. If this was Sunderland’s pavement society, then so be it. We said “hello” to Maureen, Gerry, Paul and Scott, took a quick look at the menus, and decided to head inside for a bite to eat.

On our last visit to Sunderland on a cold midweek night in December 2016, we had found a lovely pub near the city centre called “The Dun Cow” where we spent many hours among friends. The intention always was to visit this lovely Victorian establishment on this trip, the last game of the 2025/26 season, before heading over the new Keel Crossing, a pedestrianised bridge that traverses the River Wear. It was to be a little combination of both old and new.

Sadly, we ran out of time to do either.

“The Dun Cow” would have to wait until next season.

“Wendy’s Place” was our new base camp.

This would be my fifth visit to the Stadium of Light. Sadly, I never made it to Roker Park; a fact that saddens me.

The first match was in December 1999 when a Kevin Phillips hat-trick helped defeat us 1-4. Then, another “last game of the season” match in May 2009 when we won 3-2. This was an important match for me since it represented the first time in my life that I had attended all thirty-eight league games. In May 2016, ironically after the “Battle of Stamford Bridge” game with Tottenham the previous midweek, just like on this occasion, but we lost 2-3. Then, in December 2016, under Antonio Conte, a narrow 1-0 win and when a stupendous save from Thibaut Courtois extended our run of wins.

I wolfed down some brunch at “Wendy’s Place” and we then stepped out into the sunshine. The Stadium of Light was only a fifteen-minute walk away. We spotted the dark blue slither of the North Sea just a short distance to the east. The former site of Roker Park was close by.

A kind local took a team photo.

We strode over the green Wearmouth Bridge, and the Keel Bridge looked impressive to our left.

Both Ian and I spotted the very stylised “Welcome to Sunderland” signage on the south stand. As far as I could remember, this is a new feature, and the font reminded me of the typeface used on the cover of ‘sixties football programmes. I liked it a lot.

I took a few photos, then clasped my pub camera in my palm, hiding it from the steward, and was in at 3.15pm. The flights of stairs almost wiped me out, but I made it to the top tier intact. My seat was in the second row, and I slumped in my seat. For some reason, it felt like the toils of a long season had left me low on energy. I usually stand at away games, but on this occasion, I knew I would be watching from a seated position.

I soon spotted that the Chelsea players were oddly doing their pre-match shuttles at the other end of the stadium. Had they had enough of us? Were they hiding from potential scorn?

For this very last match of the season, Calum McFarlane chose this team, and I again spent the opening minutes attempting to ascertain the formation. The word in the top tier was of three at the back.

Sanchez

Fofana – Colwill – Hato

Gusto – Caicedo – Fernandez – Cucurella

Palmer – Pedro Neto

Joao Pedro

Before the entrance of the teams, not many seats in the Chelsea section were unused, and this pleased me. Red and white mosaics were held up, and in the single-tiered stand to my left, a couple of cats’ eyes peeked through a sea of black mosaics. A variety of songs were played through the PA that included “I can’t help falling in love with you” by Elvis Presley and the place erupted.

“Wise man say…”

“Dance of the nights” by Sergei Prokofiev also got an airing. It was stirring stuff. The place was rocking. European football was up for grabs, and the locals were infected by a fever.

The game kicked off with us in blue / blue / white attacking the other end. I moved down a row to sit in the front next to Lance and was happy I could sit.

“Must be getting old.”

Lance was impressed with the tumultuous noise.

“Imagine if Stamford Bridge was like this each game”

I was happy that I had correctly identified the formation, although in the first portion of the game, Gusto appeared to move inside to give solidity to the midfield.

There was noise from our section, but I was feeling adrift and found it hard to get motivated to sing too. This annoyed me.

Cole Palmer was set up by Pedro Neto, but his slow drive was easily saved. The home team came at us, and a feature of the first fifteen minutes was a succession of long throw-ins aimed at our six-yard box from the Sunderland left. By hook or by crook, we survived each ball that was launched, despite knock-ons and bobbles, and limbs stretched at awkward angles. A couple of shots flew at the Chelsea goal. Robert Sanchez saved one after a rapid break up our left flank, Enzo blocked the other. On sixteen minutes, there was a Marc Cucurella error near his touchline, but Levi Colwill reacted quickly, covered and booted the ball away for a corner.

Just after, a low ball fizzed around our box but Sunderland were just unable to get a touch.

Phew.

Nilson Angulo, whoever he is, let fly with a rasper from outside the box. The home team were on top, and Chelsea weren’t in it.

On twenty-five minutes, with the Chelsea support quietening, the ball reached Trai Hume after a long punt and a headed knock-on. The Sunderland player calmly despatched a fine strike low into the corner of Sanchez’ goal using the outside of his boot. This goal came as no real surprise. I stared sternly at the floor for ages, not wanting to look up and see the Sunderland players celebrating nor the home fans going doo lally.

There was a VAR check for offside, but the goal stood.

Sunderland still pushed on, and we looked so tired and anaemic in possession. It honestly looked like we were the first professional team in the world to practice walking football in a normal game.

“Move for each other!”

The teams traded a couple of late chances – a Joao Pedro header drifted limply wide – and at the break I barked out “disappointing Chelsea.”

And it had been deeply disappointing.

To make matters worse, we heard that Tottenham were 1-0 up at home to Everton.

Fackinell.

Sunderland started the second half with a frenzy of attacking intent; they were on fire. Brian Brobbey, who had been their main threat, slammed a shot at goal but the outstretched leg of Sanchez came to our rescue as it often has this season.  However, in the very next attack the ball was played in from Enzo Le Fee to Brobbey, whose mishit shot across the face of the goal found the unfortunate Gusto, whose wild swipe resulted in the ball crashing unceremoniously into the goal.

We were 0-2 down and our hopes of European football were looking so slim.

McFarlane’s response was to replace Hato with Reece James and to move the troops into a more familiar “four at the back” shape.

On fifty-six minutes, bizarrely, we were back in it. Neto shimmied and poked the ball square to Palmer, some twenty-five yards out, and our talisman took aim with a low strike. To my complete surprise, and everyone else’s no doubt, the ball crept in at the near post after the ‘keeper Robin Roefs could only divert the ball in.

My reaction surprised me too. There was no half-hearted cheer here; my guttural roar was full-blooded and – call me silly – I was happy that this was my reaction. I loved that after 1,557 Chelsea games, in a tiring end-of-season match, a simple goal could illicit this response from me.

“CAM ON CHOWLS.”

Was the comeback on? We all hoped so.

Well, Chelsea being Chelsea, sadly the self-destruct button is never too far away. I have to be honest; I did not clearly see the foul by Wesley Fofana on Wilson Isidor on sixty-two minutes. But this was a second yellow on the day, so off he went, to much barracking from the travelling Chelsea support. It is clearly that of all of Chelsea’s current players, Fofana is one of the least liked for footballing and non-footballing reasons.

While McFarlane restructured things by bringing on Trevoh Chalobah for Neto, I immediately thought back to that game at the same venue ten years ago in May 2016 – the last but one away match of that season – and how John Terry was sent off in the second half of that game.

Against a backdrop of negative noise from the Chelsea support – boos, swearing, catcalls, abuse – bizarrely we seemed to play a tad better with just ten men.

But the level of vitriol annoyed me at best and disgusted me at worse. Everyone has been frustrated with our “levels” this season, but I had to wonder if some within our support enjoy abusing players more than they do supporting them.

Within a few yards of where I sat, I heard venomous abuse at individual players from one side of me, while on the other a hyperventilating supporter dished out “you fucking cunt” on many occasions to one player, while standing alongside his daughter who could have been no more than nine.

This stirred up some hideous reactions inside me; sometimes my fellow supporters just make me feel like giving all of this up.

To repeat, for the millionth time :

“Managers manage. Players play. Supporters support.”

Good times and bad.

I am not sure if we picked on individual players in that lacklustre season of 2015/16, but I suspect not. In fairness, we were league champions the previous year and I think reputations of players were respected. But that was a shocking season too. There was certainly a memory of the phrase of players “downing tools” under Jose Mourinho in the depths of that winter, and it seems that phrase is uttered with annoying regularity these days too.

This day at Sunderland came on the back of the altercations I had with fellow fans at Everton and at a recent home game too. It’s been a sobering and sombre period.

Out on the pitch, there was a mesmerizing balletic turn from Palmer, who I thought never stopped trying, and an equally beguiling run deep into the Sunderland box. Alas, a cross was blocked.

On eighty-five minutes, two substitutions were made.

Liam Delap for Moises Caicedo.

Josh Acheampong for Malo Gusto.

Two minutes after, the two substitutes combined as Acheampong set up Delap, but the shot was blocked. Then, deep into extra-time, fine hold-up play from the much-maligned Delap, but after doing the hard part, once he turned to pass back to a teammate, he could only find a Sunderland player.

Ugh.

There was a massive ten minutes of injury time, but despite a few attacks at the goal down below, I was not confident of us obtaining a probably undeserved equaliser.

I had commented to Lance that it felt like the season had finished on Tuesday night against Tottenham.

And perhaps it had.

This was a tired performance from us, and – I hate to say it – a tired performance from me too. There were shouts from me but not with the same regularity as at most away games. Maybe the season had finally taken its toll.

With the final whistle close, I spotted Ian and Bobby heading for the exit. I thought it wise to follow them. I felt guilty about leaving before the end of a game but as I reached the concourse, the final whistle blew.

There would be no UEFA competition for us next season.

We all met up outside, and with the moon visible high in the sky way above the stadium, we caught the train back to Newcastle while the locals – the Wearsiders, the Mackems, the Roker Men, the Black Cats, whatever they call themselves – celebrated the win and a cherished European place.

There was a final pint in “The Mile Castle” near the main train station and it took our total to sixteen pubs in the three days. I have to say that the nights out on Friday and Saturday were too of the funniest, and most joyous, and most relaxing back-to-back nights I can remember.

We met up with a few more faces. On the drive up on Friday, I had mentioned to the lads if a friend of ours – Nick – had the record of seeing Chelsea Football Club more times than anyone else in history. He has been a regular since the early ‘fifties. Luckily, we bumped into him and his son Robbie in this pub, so I was able to ask him his thoughts on this. He wasn’t so sure. He said he missed a fair few in the ‘eighties and mentioned a few others that might well hold the record, the late Ron Hockings being one of them. Our mutual friend Allie was around 90 games shy of Nick’s current total of around 2,500. Of course, Cathy must be in contention too.

On a personal note, I was happy to record my fourth straight season of not missing a single Chelsea league game; 152/152.

My total number of matches attended this season was down on last season, however, when I reached the never to be beaten 100. This season I have seen Chelsea 52 times and Frome Town 23 times; a total of 75.

Numbers, numbers, numbers.

Talking of which, a word of heartfelt thanks to the many friends and acquaintances who continue to dip into this blog and keep the numbers relatively healthy. Although total views are down on 2025, I have already witnessed 13,538 visitors in the first five months of this year compared to 24,129 in the whole of last year.

This of labour love costs me around £300 per year to keep it going, but I see no reason why I can’t keep adding to the current total of over 2.25 million words. It’s only the equivalent of a pint each week.

More numbers.

I often heard that 2025/26 was our worst season in recent memory, but these numbers would suggest not.

CHELSEA 2015/16

Won 12

Drew 14

Lost 12

50 Points.

CHELSEA 2025/26

Won 14

Drew 10

Lost 14

52 Points.

But it has been a mad season, eh? It has tested many of us, but many of us still find it hard to stop going.

I think it could easily be summed up by this simple phrase.

“World champions, but.”

Right, I am off to buy some Mars bars in case Xabi Alonso’s new team needs an added kick.

See you in August.

Tales From Neverland

Liverpool vs. Chelsea : 9 May 2026.

I only finished the blog for the dire Nottingham Forest game at around 10pm on Friday. Sometimes, my brain needs a few days to put everything from a game day into some semblance of order. However, there was an early start required on the Saturday as the foot soldiers of Chelsea Football Club were due to muster just after high noon in Liverpool. The plan was to leave Dodge at 6am and get up to Anfield at 11am for the 12.30pm start.

I set my alarm for 4.45am.

The alarm sounded and I was up. But something seemed strange. Outside, it was surprisingly light. I looked again. It was 5.45am. Bollocks. I had set the incorrect time.

Now it was me doing the Corporal Jones impersonation.

There was a quick text to PD and LP; “running late, see you soon.”

I collected PD at 6.20am and LP at 6.40am and we were soon having breakfast at Strensham Services at the target time of 7.45am.

I was back on track.

The journey up to Liverpool was clouded by the shared knowledge that we were probably in for another tiresome game of football, and the chances of us losing our seventh successive game of league football was likely.

A few people had commented that Liverpool were enduring a rum old season themselves, and that we had a chance to nick a result.

I, dear reader, was far from convinced.

It was a decent run up, despite a period of rain an hour or so out. It wasn’t long before I took the slip road from the M6 to the M62; a well-travelled route.

Nearing Liverpool, the skies brightened, if not our mood in the car. For so long, trips by car to both to see away games at Liverpool and Everton were virtually the same, following virtually the same tracks. Now, with Everton decamped to a riverside site, the final few miles to each team’s stadium will now be different. With the Liverpool stadium capacity now at 61,276, cars are forced to park further out. We spotted cars being parked on kerbs and on verges, for free, a good mile and a half walk away from Anfield. On Utting Avenue, just east of “The Arkles” I spotted a little place that I used to use was now charging a whopping £25.

I dropped the lads off outside “The Arkles” – a famous pub for away fans going to both Anfield and Goodison over the years – and I was pleased with my timing; it was a couple of minutes past 11am. I then skirted Stanley Park and was able to park up in a tried and trusted car park near Goodison, although I was shocked that the fee had shot up to £20.

The familiar walk across the gently sloping rise of Stanley Park towards the steel of Anfield took me fifteen minutes, and I arrived at the stadium at 11.30am.

There was a sound system blaring out some Liverpool songs at the top of the park, and it was odd for me to hear a song about “Fernando Torres, Liverpool’s Number Nine”; I wondered if their ill-feelings towards him have faded over the years.

Approaching Anfield, virtually the first face that I saw was of Stuart, who lives in a village just three and a half miles away from my house in Somerset. I often capture him in my photos as he sits in the front row behind The Shed goal. We had a brief chat about our – slim – chances.

With time to kill, I embarked on a quick tour around the perimeter of Anfield, which now covers a much larger footprint compared to my first visit in May 1985. The expansion of the red brick and silver steel behemoth has caused the demolition of many terraced streets that used to hug the old stadium.

I took a selection of photos to bulk out my day’s harvest, since I was only using my sub-standard “pub camera” and I knew that the game photos wouldn’t be of much worth. I noted a few additions that I had not spotted before. There were concrete benches honouring former Liverpool heroes – I took a photo of one dedicated to Bill Shankly – under the mass of the giant Main Stand, and a statue depicting John Houlding who formed the club in 1892.

It must irk some Liverpool supporters that they were formed some fourteen years after Everton. In comparison, it doesn’t irk me in the slightest that Chelsea were formed twenty-six years after Fulham. It is interesting, though, that without Everton refusing to pay a higher rent at Anfield and without the Fulham board refusing to move to Stamford Bridge, neither Chelsea nor Liverpool clubs would exist.

Close by, a memorial garden for Diogo Jota who died in July 2025.

On the exterior of The Kop, there are images of players and branding splashed on windows of the club shop.

The phrase “Never Done” was used and my guess is that this uses “You’ll Never Walk Alone” as its starting point.

I continued the wordplay and grumbled to myself “might as well call this place Neverland because we never fucking win here.”

This was my twenty-ninth visit to Anfield with Chelsea and I had only witnessed five wins.

1 February 1992 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 2

8 May 2009 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 3

2 May 2010 : Liverpool 0 Chelsea 2

27 April 2014 : Liverpool 0 Chelsea 2

8 November 2014 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 2

We have had our moments – featuring some truly massive wins – but they have been fleeting.

I took a photo of the upper mast of Brunel’s Great Eastern ship which has acted as a flagpole at Anfield for decades and marks the sire where my mate Pete and I, in true Scouser fashion, slipped in for free at half-time to watch on the old Kop to witness the first of those wins in 1992.

The Centenary Stand, where I watched the Paul Elliot leg break in 1992, became the Sir Kenny Dalglish Stand a few years back, and who is to say this two-tiered structure will gain another level before long?

At the rear of this stand is a simple plaque remembering the events of 29 May 1985. I touched the Juventus crest. My Italian mate had a ticket in the infamous Section Z at Heysel but – thank God – was unable to attend the match due to an excess of schoolwork that week.

I skirted the final corner and walked under the repositioned “Shankly Gates” – forged in Frome in Somerset and revealed in December 1982 – that used to be in the north-west corner but now sit in the north-east corner.

I membered how the old “Annie Road” stand used to abut the road of its name, but the footprint of the ultra-new Anfied Road Stand has stamped all over those memories.

Then, the final corner, the away entrance, and the scene was awash with orange-jacketed stewards. A quick frisk down, and I was in. It was bang on midday. As I have rudely commented before, for all of the new space due to the extension of this stand, the away concourse is as big as it was in 1985, with very cramped facilities.

I made my way to my seat in row nine but strangely did not spot a single face that I recognised in the concourse. Then, out of nowhere:

“Chris!”

It was Brian, a Chelsea fan that I had not met before, from Chicago, and I felt embarrassed that I did not recognise him despite being mates on “Facebook”. He thanked me for these never-ending tales, and I appreciated the kind words. It was his first visit to Anfield.

Once inside the away enclosure, I was surprised with how hot it was, with the sun beating down, and I began to rue wearing a black hoody. My friend Kim called by for a quick chat; she picked up a last-minute ticket and had the luxury of being able to walk from her mearby house to a Chelsea game.

Alas, there was no Alan, no Gary and no John alongside me on this occasion. I took a few photos of the starters and then the substitutes going through their routines.

The teams entered the pitch, and the flags were waved in The Kop. I didn’t think “You’ll Never Walk Alone” was song with much gusto on this occasion. Scarves were held aloft. It’s their thing.

Right, our team. I had not seen it announced prior to the start of the game, and as the players lined-up, I first thought that we had gone for a 3/4/3 for some reason, with Cucurella and Gusto the wide men outside Hato, the returning Colwill and Fofana, then Caicedo and Santos in the middle, with Enzo and Palmer supporting Joao Pedro.

As always, we attacked The Kop in the first half, and that entire end was engulfed in a large and hazy grey shadow making it difficult to spot details.

We began brightly, and Cole Palmer wriggled into the box on the left and forced a save from the Liverpool ‘keeper Giorgi Mamardashvili, whoever he is.

Then, a Liverpool break, and a foul in a central position. The free kick was some way out, and Dominic Szoboslai’s thumping effort was blocked but the ball ran to Rio Ngumoha not so many yards away from me. Palmer seemed to be doing a good job in stopping a cross. Alas, the ball was played back to Ryan Gravenberch, and he touched the ball inside, aimed, and struck. I did not see the ball go in.

I just heard it.

The home sections roared.

It was their first shot on goal and we were 0-1 down.

My reaction? I bowed my head and just stood silent and still, looking down at my jeans and my trainers for what seemed like an eternity. I did not want to see the smiles on the faces of the Liverpool players, nor the grins on the faces of the red clad hordes. I was deeply sad, too. I just needed my own moment.

Only six minutes were on the clock; or rather those four minimalist electronic clocks that are angled above all four corner flags at Anfield and have become part of my personal nightmare on virtually every trip to this stadium.

Soon into the game, I formed a little self-help group with a familiar face in front – name unknown – with his young son and two young lads from Bradford behind me. We were soon berating Gusto for not taking the ball past his marker into tons of open space ahead, and also the lack of movement, yet again, from our attackers.

We carved out a half-chance at the far post, but then Liverpool came again. A corner on the far side was taken short, and Szoboslai swung in a high cross from deep. There were two Liverpool players unmarked on the far post, and the ball dropped for the second one in line. Virgil van Dijk bounced a shot against the turf and it flew over the bar.

We tried to obtain a foothold. There was a fine run from Palmer, who passed to Joao Pedro, but the ball was just too close to the Liverpool ‘keeper.

On twenty minutes, applause broke out, and I guessed that this was in memory of Diogo Jota. If I had taken the right amount of attention I would have realiosed that his shirt number was 20. A decent number of us joined in.

I kept trying to check the shape of the team as the half progressed, but it was not easy being so low in the stands. Cucurella, out left, really was playing in a very advanced role on that flank.

And he was having a fine game as the half-developed, and – whisper it – we became the stronger of the two teams. From the twentieth minute to the thirtieth minute, we were much better, playing the ball intelligently to feet, then picking good passes into space.

It was unnerving.

“CAM ON CHELS.”

On the half-hour, a run in behind from the energetic Cucurella and he forced a save from Mamardashvili. A second chance for him came too, but the ‘keeper was on form.

I turned to the lads behind; “we’re playing well, here, you know.”

Despite a volley of abuse when Liverpool took the lead, the home fans were quiet, and even nervously so. Anfield is rarely the cauldron of noise that the media would like us to believe (although in fairness, what ground is these days?) and it was easy to detect their frustrations with the manager and his way of playing.

Whereas Klopp’s modus operandi pleased the Anfield faithful, this was not a well-oiled Slot machine.

As the first half developed, their fans seemed even more frustrated than us.

We were awarded a free-kick out on our right, and I decided to snap a few photos. Enzo stood with Palmer. As Enzo stroked the ball goalwards, I snapped again. Unbelievably, the ball seemed to go unhindered through a packed penalty area and – much to our astonished joy – we screamed our delight as it crept in at the far post.

There were hints of laughter amongst the noise emanating from the Anfield Road.

Thirty-five minutes were on the clocks.

Just after, a fine pass from Moises Caicedo presented Enzo with another chance, but the ‘keeper was able to block.

This was excellent stuff from us.  It was lovely to see a few trademark twists and turns from Palmer, hopefully getting back to his best, and it was a joy to see him create space out of nowhere. Elsewhere, Cucurella was continually raiding the left flank, and I settled with the notion of him being the advanced wide man ahead of Hato at left-back. Levi Colwill was a commanding figure at the back, and Caicedo – whose form has dipped the past few months – was back to his best.

It really was a very promising show.

At half-time, I detected a rumble of discontent from The Kop; yes, boos.

At half-time, I sought refuge out of the heat and disappeared into the concourse. Here, two acquaintances were discussing our encouraging display, and one reckoned that our upturn in form came when both sets of supporters applauded Jota. It was an interesting take.

My throat was parched, and I gulped down some water then returned to my place in row nine. Back at my seat, a blast from the past when these tales were forming on the Chelsea In America website in 2008; a half-time Burger.

“Good to see you mate.”

Soon into the second period, a fine Caicedo pass to Cucurella had us excited, and I snapped a shot as he took the ball on. His pass square was lost to me, but I saw the ball rebound out to Palmer who smashed the ball home.

Fackinell, la.

We were up 2-1.

At Anfield.

The celebrations were but yards away and I snapped away. In one very blurred photo Enzo is seen doing his own “cold Palmer.”

“That’s just the ball I want to see played” I said to anyone who was listening. It was magnificent, dissecting time and space, and cutting out three defenders.

The away end was on fire.

And then, a minute or so after the goal, I looked up to see “VAR Review” and we were stopped in our tracks.

“Always the last to know.”

The decision hurt; offside.

Bollocks.

At the other end, a cross deep into our box and Curtis Jones headed home from close range, but the misery was short-lived as an offside flag was soon raised.

Phew.

Liverpool rallied in the second period, but although they enjoyed the lion share of possession, I noted nervousness and displeasure from many of the home fans. I don’t think I had ever heard Anfield so quiet. The away end was hardly boiling over with noise although we did have moments. There was the standard anti-Clearlake and anti-Eghbali chants, but I found it noticeable that the Chelsea support was not so keen to air the usual anti-Liverpool rhetoric.

I thought to myself “we’ve actually found something we dislike more than this lot.”

Szoboszlai thumped a long range effort against the base of Jorgensen’s left-hand post.

On the hour, a bloody fantastic save from Filip Jorgensen – not really tested apart from the goal – as he sprung to turn a blast from that man Szoboszlai around the post.

I kept looking at the clock.

“Come on. Ticktock.”

On sixty-three minutes, Callum McFarlane replaced Andrey Santos with Reece James. There was much applause from us.

“He’s one of our own.”

There was a different response from the home fans on sixty-eight minutes when crowd favourite Ngumoha was replaced by Alexander Isak. Boos boomed around Anfield.

Chelsea were boosted by James’ appearance and everything that he did displayed constant calmness and quality. However, I am increasingly perplexed by his role these days. I still think he is too quiet as captain, and he seems to spend a third of his time at right-back, a third in midfield and a third on the bench. He is a bit of a conundrum is Reece.

On this day, though, he was sensational for half-an-hour.

As Liverpool continued to dominate, their crowd remained quiet.

Liverpool made two substitutions of their own, but our changes were complete. The game continued, and the excellent Joao Pedro danced into the box but shot high and wide.

At the other end, van Dyke lunged at a cross and headed against the bar.

The game, though not a classic, had its moments.

On ninety minutes, Joao Pedro took hold of the ball wide on the left, then waltzed and wriggled past various Liverpool players and into the box. He continued and found himself heading towards the goal-line. A challenge came in. There was a shout from those around me though I was not convinced with my naked eyes. The move petered out.

It went to VAR.

No penalty.

We seemed to be tiring a little at the end, but we gathered strength from somewhere.

It was noticeable that, during the seven minutes of extra time, the Liverpool ‘keeper took a while to release the ball, and this drew howls of disdain from the 57,000 Liverpool fans. Of course, it reminded me so much of our play of late.

At the final whistle, loud boos from The Kop.

I’ve never heard The Kop boo a Liverpool performance before.

Mind you, having seen us win only five times in twenty-nine games, the situation never really arises.

At the end of the game, there were well wishes from a few stewards. I know it might offend some people, but I have always found the LFC match stewards to be the friendliest out there.

The consensus was that our performance had surprised us all, and we were all thankful that the run of losses in the league had ended. Whisper it, but I was proud of the lads at Anfield. This team is not the easiest to warm to, but there has been confusion everywhere once Maresca got the push this season. I hope that everyone can use this positive performance as a catalyst for another memorable day at Wembley.

We walked back down the slope to the car park near Goodison, and I began the slow drive out of the city onto the famous East Lancs Road, the M57 and then the M62. I drove through Knowsley, a suburb where Everton once pondered a site for a new stadium, but we all agreed that they are best served by their new place by the river.

We stopped for refreshments at Stafford, where Burger and Mrs. Burger have been living since 2010 after moving from Canada, and I drove on.

Eventually, I climbed the long hill to J18 of the M4 and took the usual exit to the A46 towards Bath.

“Not long to go now lads.”

Next up, a trip to the FA Cup Final.

The FA Cup Final!

I will never tire of that.

Out of interest, I close with a little graphic of my most visited away venues with Chelsea and our record at each venue.

MANCHESTER UNITED           30          5-10-15

ARSENAL                                        29          6-9-14

LIVERPOOL                                   29          5-9-15

TOTTENHAM                                 27          12-7-8

EVERTON                                       25          8-7-10

The punchline writes itself, I guess.

See you at Wembley.

Tales From Yet Another Loss

Chelsea vs. Nottingham Forest : 4 May 2026.

It is amazing what one win did to my brain. That victory against Leeds United at Wembley, though far from convincing, was enough for the memories of the five consecutive league losses, without a single goal to our name. to begin to fade away. For a few days before our league match against Nottingham Forest at Stamford Bridge, I began to embrace the final five games of the season with a little more confidence. And on the drive to London, alongside the other two musketeers PD and Parky, I aired my thoughts.

“All of a sudden, I am looking forward to the end of the season. Two classic away days, including an end-of-season three-nighter on Tyneside for the final game, two home matches, including an enthralling home game with Tottenham on what could be one of the great nights in a long time, and a trip to the FA Cup Final thrown in for good measure. This one against Forest is the least exciting to be honest, but even this I am looking forward to.”

All because of a win; a big W at Wembley.

W

There had been an enjoyable spell in the pub before we made our way to Stamford Bridge by tube from Putney Bridge. We were joined by Ollie from Normandy, on his birthday, alongside his two mates Jerome and Franck, and also Brenda and Kerry from Kentucky. The pub was quieter than usual, but the laughs kept us going.

I was inside Stamford Bridge at 2.45pm, and it was time to check the team that Callum McFarlane had selected.

  1. Robert Sanchez.
  2. Malo Gusto.
  3. Marc Cucurella.
  4. Moises Caicedo.
  5. Tosin Adarabioyo.
  6. Trevoh Chalobah.
  7. Cole Palmer.
  8. Romeo Lavia.
  9. Joao Pedro.
  10. Enzo Fernandez.
  11. Jesse Derry.

There was a full debut for young Jesse Derry after his fleeting appearance as a substitute up at Wrexham in the FA Cup in February.

His shirt was, in fact, number 55; a fine Chelsea number.

Between PD and I in The Sleepy Hollow, there were two empty seats with both Alan and Clive unable to attend. Empty seats, in fact, were dotted around many sections of the stadium. In the pub and on the tube, I had briefly chatted with the two Americans about the likelihood of an upgraded Stamford Bridge ever being realised, in whatever shape or form, and I mentioned my fear that we wouldn’t regularly fill a mega stadium. The debate about a whole stadium rebuild – or worse, a move – has trundled on for years now and I am beginning to wonder if I will ever see a change from us playing at the current Stamford Bridge in my lifetime.

The previous day, Aston Villa played a weakened team against Tottenham, and we howled. A day later, we all expected Forest to do the same.

Well, before we had time to settle down and get acclimatised to the players on display in Forest’s smart pin-striped shirts, we witnessed a calamity taking place around forty yards away. With one minute on the clock, Forest worked the ball to Dilane Bakwa on their right, and his inch-perfect cross over the heads of the two dithering centre-backs fell to Taiwo Awoniyi who leapt and headed cleanly past Robert Sanchez.

Fackinell Forest.

So much for a weakened team, so much for a little burst of optimism.

If I didn’t put my head in my hands, I surely should have done.

Sigh.

The game restarted, with spectators still finding their seats in the areas of the MHU around me.

With just two minutes on the clock, a small passage of play sent my mind reeling back in time.

Jesse Derry’s first touch of the ball at Stamford Bridge, and his subsequent spin away from his marker – pure poetry in fact – reminded me so much of Paul Canoville’s first-ever touch in his home debut, only yards away from where Derry skinned his man just over forty-four years later.

I missed Canoville’s infamous debut at Selhurst Park on 12 April 1982 but was present in The Shed when he became the first black player to play for Chelsea at Stamford Bridge on 8 May 1982 against Luton Town. He came on as a late substitute for Peter Rhoades-Brown, and my memory was of more boos – though perhaps not so intense as against Palace – from sections of the home crowd. Paul’s exquisite turn had me purring and must have caused twitches of annoyance from the bigots in the crowd that day.

I had been talking to Ollie about the size of the old Stamford Bridge in the pub, and I loved the fact that I used to be standing on a section of that huge sweeping terrace that someone stood on in 1905, in 1955 and in 1970, and all other years. There was a simple link to our past, and every other home game when I used to stand on The Shed, and although everything has changed so much since 1982, I like the idea that first Paul and then Jesse performed their home debut spins on the same patch of terra firma in front of the East Stand.

And, of course, all of this history would be lost should we move from the current Stamford Bridge site.

The game developed but it was not easy on the eye. We exhibited the same reticence to move the ball quickly and into space. The movement of others continued to annoy me.

On ten minutes, Enzo – who was looking the liveliest – took aim from twenty yards and stroked the ball at goal after nice play from Derry and Joao Pedro. The ball shaved the outside of the far post.

On fifteen minutes, another awkward cross from the Forest left, and a ridiculously stupid shirt pull by Gusto on Awoniyi and the referee Anthony Taylor awarded a penalty after a VAR review.

Igor Jesus converted the spot-kick and their players celebrated right under our noses by the corner flag.

Fackinell Forest.

Two minutes later, Palmer casually lifted a shot wide of the far post, and we all sighed as one.

Not so long after, the cheeky buggers among the Trick Trees’ support took the piss.

“Chelsea give us a song. Chelsea, Chelsea give us a song.”

The players on the pitch had given us nothing to shout about, and Stamford Bridge was deathly quiet. But it shouldn’t be like this should it? Our job is simple as supporters. It’s in the job title.

We carved a couple of half-chances. There was a deep cross from Gusto, and Derry volleyed dramatically over. Then, Palmer to Enzo and another shot from Derry, but a save at the near post from Matz Sels.

This, by and large, was tedious football, with nobody having the vision to pick passes. It wasn’t expansive. But such is the way of this tedious method of football these days. It is all so bone-crunchingly dull.

On thirty-eight minutes, a rare piece of skill, a beautiful drag back from Enzo but he couldn’t get his shot away.

Five minutes later, a penalty shout after Joao Pedro danced into the box and fell by the goal-line. Then, another penalty shout and a bouncer at goal from Gusto, easily saved by Sels. There had been a couple of Forest chances but we had been playing slightly better in the closing moments of the half.

Enzo took two corners back-to-back and from the second one, Derry clashed heads with Zach Abbot. Both players went down. A penalty was given. Derry had gone down before in the game, but he stayed down, here, for a long time. We grew concerned. The minutes past. After an age, he was stretchered off, the poor lad. His home debut had been full of promise, too.

Both sets of supporters applauded him off and he was replaced by Liam Delap, with Joao Pedro shifting left.

Forest’s Abbott went off too.

Alas, in the fifty-fourth minute, Palmer’s penalty was low and weak, and Sels fell to his right and parried the shot. Palmer was unable to squeeze home the rebound.

The first half eventually came to and end on fifty-nine minutes.

There were boos at half-time.

Fackinell Chelsea.

There was a chat at the break with a few mates. I sent this text to the chaps in a WhatsApp Group.

“Turgid AI shite. No imagination. No spontaneity. No freedom. Dull percentage football. Automatons. Sick of it.”

This is my main gripe with football these days. Regardless of how Chelsea play, and God-knows we have been dire of late, the over-riding feeling is a sense of football changing for the worst with possession football eroding the sense of fun and enjoyment at every opportunity. AI getting hold of football and squuezing the life out of it.

Chelsea’s form might continue to nosedive for a while yet, but our football and the football of others is just so dire.

On a few occasions during that first half, I just lost it.

“One of you move!”

“Move for each other!”

There was simply no dynamism and no flair.

Sigh.

I saw our number 6 on the pitch at half-time, and my mind instantly played a trick on me.

“Thiago Silva.”

It was, of course, Levi Colwill and he replaced Tosin as the second half began for his first game of 2026/27. Let’s hope he is fit enough for the Cup Final.

Five minutes in, a shot from Cucurella was so high that the pigeons on the top of the Matthew Harding roof ducked for cover.

Cucurella had been having his usual game; tons of chasing down, tons of tackling, tons of energy, even though he has a tendency to get caught out of possession. If running around like an animated Corporal Jones was a determinant of caring, the Spanish defender would pass with flying colours.

On fifty-one minutes, a clean break down our left – “don’t panic, don’t panic!!!” – and Morgan Gibbs-White was able to push the ball across for Awoniyi to tap in from close range.

I immediately commented “that is the ball we should be playing” as Elliot Anderson played the ball forward intelligently to Gibbs-White.

There was a VAR check for offside, but Awoniyi was on by the narrowest of margins.

Fackinell Forest.

The response from the home support was immediate and provided the loudest chant of the afternoon by far.

“FUCK OFF EGBAHLI – YOU’RE NOT WANTED HERE.”

I am not so sure any of the protests on the Fulham Road hit home with the board, but this direct messaging service provided by 37,000 Chelsea supporters just might do the trick.

Andrey Santos replaced Lavia, the sixty-minute man.

On the hour, Forest lumped the ball forwards and a brave Sanchez and a possibly braver Gibbs-White collided. Another delay took place. Both players were substituted after a delay of six minutes. I noticed that Sanchez, with his head bandaged, did not receive much applause at all, which was a bit tight.

He was replaced by Filip Jorgensen.

At the other end, Delap caused a bit of a disturbance in the Forest box by completely missing a cross, but the ball fell to Gusto who re-worked it into the six-yard box, and Joao Pedro stabbed home at the second attempt.

Alas, he was offside via another VAR review, by the narrowest of margins.

The Chelsea crowd sang “we nearly scored” and I didn’t know whether to laugh or bloody cry.

We had a couple of shots on goal via Delap and Palmer.

With all the delays, I chirped to PD that “this game could still be going on when we come back for Tottenham.”

By now, vast swathes of blue seats were visible around Stamford Bridge.

Nine extra minutes of injury time were signalled.

Lo and behold, in the dying embers of a horrible match, Gusto swung in a deep ball towards Cucurella who headed the ball back towards Joao Pedro. He controlled the ball with his chest, and bicycle-kicked to perfection. What a fantastic goal. I was hoping my photo would do it justice.

Well. it almost did.

The score was a little more respectable, but this was such a disappointing affair against a weakened Forest team.

I looked up at the slightly fading gold adornments on the high walls above The Shed and it all looked a bit pathetic.

“World Champions.”

By now, these banners look like those gory and gaudy gilt additions in The Oval Office.

Maybe, Boehly and Eghbali will start to plan the demolition of the East Stand and replace it with a huge ballroom to take the attention away from the horrific play on the pitch.

Fackinell.

Yes, I stayed to the end. It’s what supporters do. It’s in the job description. Thousands had fled the scene of the crime by the end though. Bizarrely, I clapped the lads off. Don’t ask me why.

Outside, I met up with Ollie, Jerome and Franck underneath the Osgood statue and I took a photo of them. They were smiling, I am not sure how, and I bellowed “jeux sans frontières” as I left them, and I smiled too.

Don’t ask me why.

On the way home, with Manchester City dropping points at Everton – bollocks – I took a quick look at the league table, and our current form shook me to the core.

L L L L L L

And next up, Liverpool away.

Oh boy.

See you there.

Tales From The Anniversary Game

Chelsea vs. Newcastle United : 14 March 2026.

I was in early for the match with Newcastle United. I had left the chaps in the pub and fancied a little mooch around the stadium prior to entering. It was a sunny afternoon, with an occasional chill to the air.

As I approached my seat in The Sleepy Hollow, I heard my name being called. I spotted Joe, who is Hersham Bob’s son, and comes to occasional matches at The Bridge. Hersham Bob wasn’t going to be at this one, instead giving his ticket to Joe so that he could bring his Godson along to his very first Chelsea match. Instead, Bob had spent the afternoon watching his local team Walton & Hersham defeat Farnham Town. Joe asked if I could take a few photos of the two of them and I duly obliged.

I explained that I liked the synchronicity of this, since my first-ever Chelsea game was also against Newcastle United at Stamford Bridge. In fact, for the second time in three seasons, the football calendar almost gave me the perfect date for this game.

Back in 1974, Chelsea played Newcastle United at Stamford Bridge on Saturday 16 March.

Two years ago, approaching the fiftieth anniversary of my debut, Chelsea played Newcastle United at home on Monday 11 March. So near and yet so far from the perfect match.

And here we were, in 2026, closer still.

Prior to this game, I had seen Chelsea play the Geordies forty-three times at Stamford Bridge in the fifty-odd years since that momentous day in my life. Apart from the COVID season of 2020/21, you must go way back to 1985/86 to when I last missed a home league game against them. The appearance of those black and white shirts at Chelsea is always an important moment for me; it reconnects me with my childhood and some of the loveliest memories of going to football over the years.

That first game in 1974, the 6-0 rout in 1980 with Phil Driver on fire, watching as Pat Nevin ran riot in 1983, seeing the emergence of the Kevin Keegan-managed “Toon Army” from 1993 until 1996, and then meeting Keegan in the tunnel before a game in the Spring of 1995, then a hugely enjoyable 1-0 win against them as the league leaders a little later in 1995 and the utter domination of them for many years. In all of the thirty-six league games I had witnessed against them, there were just three Chelsea losses. In 1983, a 0-2 defeat with Kevin Keegan a player, in 1986 and a poor 1-3 defeat, then in 2012, a 0-2 loss and those two Papiss Cisse wonder strikes. There was also a 3-4 loss in a League Cup tie in 2010.

Like us, Newcastle are a strange team this season; they have been underperforming, and have been under Sunderland too, which might be seen as more of a concern to their followers.

While Hersham Bob was watching his hometown team winning in southwest London, my hometown team were winning in the southwest of England. Frome Town stormed to a 4-0 half-time lead at home to Bishops Cleeve – what a quintessentially English name – but there were no further goals to report. The win left Dodge with a mighty fine 27-5-2 record, and with a twelve-point gap at the top of our division. This outstanding record is the highest points-per-game yield in the first nine levels of the football pyramid in England and Wales. If there isn’t a trophy for that, there bloody well should be.

The spectators drifted in. There were still blue skies overhead.

The team?

Robert Sanchez

Malo Gusto – Wesley Fofana – Trevoh Chalobah – Marc Cucurella

Reece James – Moises Caicedo

Cole Plamer – Enzo Fernandez – Alejandro Garnacho

Joao Pedro

I had watched the PSG game on Wednesday on TV and thought we had been tasty until the Filip Jorgensen error that gifted the home team their third goal. I think this is a commonly held view. However, I couldn’t believe the amount of people who reckoned that we were poor for most of the game. Nah, couldn’t see that.

More than a few people outside the stadium had quizzed me beforehand:

“Can you play in goal?”

So, I returned the favour and asked others.

Alas, none of us could.

Outside on the Fulham Road, I spotted two new Nike advertisements on two billboards involving Estevao. The one on Brittania Road – a prime site – has featured Chelsea players before. I took one photo of Estevao’s image behind the ever-present religious missionary who has been at Stamford Bridge for around two decades (also spotted recently at Arsenal, you have to admire his persistence, I have never ever seen anyone stop and intelligently engage with him in all these years) and so I titled the image “Estevao The Redeemer.”

There were pre-match huddles – no, I didn’t spot the referee Paul Tierney in the middle of ours – after the usual pre-match flag-waving, flames and fireworks. Much was made of Reece James signing a six-year extension by the shouty-shouty match announcer, and his crowd-surfer flag appeared to my left in the MHL.

No Clive, no Alan; just PD and little old me in row D of the Sleepy Hollow for this one.

The lovely royal blue and the famous black-and-white stripes began their battle once again. There were a couple of Geordie staples to set things off :

“We are the Geordies, the Geordie Boot Boys…”

“Oh me lads, you should have seen us gannin…”

It was a pretty decent start, quite lively, and we enjoyed most of the early pressure, with Garnacho racing down the wing on the left. At times his running style is rather odd, like a hyper-active cartoon character. Unfortunately, many of his final decisions appear to be made by Bugs Bunny.

A corner was pinged into the box and Fofana leapt to meet the ball – snap! – but it flew over. Not long after, the ball was played inside to Palmer, but he sliced his shot well wide of the left-hand post. There were efforts from James and Garnacho, forever looking to creep inside and shoot. On the quarter of an hour, a nice break involved Garnacho passing to Enzo but his shot was blocked.

Alas, on eighteen minutes, Newcastle caught us out. They had not really threatened too much but former blue Tino Livramento was afforded too much space, but he also spotted space, a huge tract of land that would be worth millions if it was to be sold at market prices, knocking an early ball through our defensive lines to Joe Willock. I feared the outcome. He advanced and Sanchez rushed out. Instead of shooting, he passed to Anthony Gordon who easily pushed the ball in. The appeals for offside were too pathetic for further comment. We had been undone as simply as it gets. We were caught too square, and nobody was remotely close to Willock. It was shocking defending.

Bollocks.

Buoyed by this goal, the visitors now took command as the frustration grew in the home areas. Unfortunately, this manifested itself in one of my co-supporters calling Moises Caicedo a “C-word” and I inwardly fumed.

The Geordies pieced together a couple of half-chances, but thankfully the danger passed.

On the half-hour, Garnacho advanced and passed to Enzo, who intelligently dummied for Palmer to take aim. Alas, his shot was blocked.

Just after, after a terribly long lull, I heard the first real chant of the day from the home supporters, a half-hearted “Amazing Grace.”

Must do better.

Then, Sanchez did well to claw away an effort from Willock at the near post.

On thirty-six minutes, a strong curling effort from Palmer was turned around his post by Aaron Ramsdale in The Shed goal.

I then heard from the depths of the Sleepy Hollow, someone call Reece James, the club captain, a “C-Word.”

Simmer. Simmer. Simmer.

There was a rather unorthodox save, late on, from Sanchez, and the worry of a VAR check on some pushing-and-shoving by the captain at a corner. Thankfully, no penalty.

There were boos at half-time. I felt like booing our support; we had been as quiet as lambs.

It had been a poor game of football thus far, and I momentarily thought back to that intoxicating game of football that took place in December 1995, forty percent of the way through my history with this lot, and the personalities and players on the pitch and the sidelines. At the time, our manager Glenn Hoddle had begun to use wingbacks and ours were Dan Petrescu and Terry Phelan. Eddie Newton and Dennis Wise were our stalwarts in midfield, while Mark Hughes lead the line. The visitors were managed by Kevin Keegan and his team included Lee Clark, Keith Gillespie, David Ginola, Peter Beardsley and Les Ferdinand. A powerful angled strike from Petrescu gave us the 1-0 win. Over thirty years on, I can vividly remember the thrill of watching a magnificent match at an absolutely rammed Stamford Bridge from the temporary seats at The Shed. The gate was 31,098, and the Geordies lost their first game of the season to us that day. It is a match that is often overlooked in favour of the more high-scoring triumphs – take your pick – against the Tynesiders, but that game and that atmosphere and that victory were huge.

It was a wonderful Chelsea performance, but the best was to come after the game had ended. In 1994, a book called “Blue Is The Colour” was written by Khadija Buckland, a native of West London, who was living close by in Chippenham in Wiltshire. Glenn and I became acquainted with her via her friendship with Ron Harris and, after a while, we arranged to take Khadija up to Chelsea so she could sell her book in the executive areas of the East Stand. Anyway, to cut to the chase, as a reward for taking her up, she had arranged for Glenn, my Geordie mate Pete and me to gain entrance to the players’ bar after the game with Newcastle. We shuffled around by the entrance to the tunnel and waited by a door. I remember that pop star Robbie Williams quickly left the bar and we were then escorted in by Khadija.

Talk about the inner sanctum.

In a small room behind the old changing rooms (which I am sure no longer exists, what with the enlarging of the home dressing room area), we stood at the cosy bar, while Dennis Wise, his girlfriend and mother were chatting in a small group. A few players flitted in and out. I always remember Mark Hughes; arriving quietly, standing at the bar alone, silently sipping a lager. I went over to ask him to sign the programme and I was genuinely awestruck.

Shall we go back to 2026?

Do we have to?

The manager took off Gusto and replaced him with Liam Delap. The shuffle around was easy to work out. James to right-back, Enzo in midfield, Joao Pedro behind Delap. It had a far more attacking feel.

Garnacho was soon involved down below me, but how I wished that he wouldn’t cut back onto his right peg…Every. Single. Time.

Harvey Barnes raced away on a quick break, taking the ball right into the danger area, and I feared danger, but his final pass to Nick Woltemade was heavy, and the chance evaporated.

Delap then looked lively, picking up a loose ball and shooting at goal, but Ramsdale was able to push the ball wide.

At last, some noise from the Matthew Harding.

“Come On Chelsea – Come On Chelsea – Come On Chelsea – Come On Chelsea.”

For the first fifteen minutes of the half, with the Stamford Bridge crowd now energised a little, and with the volumes at pretty reasonable levels – for 2026, not 1995 – it honestly felt like an equaliser was on its way and we would be in contention for a much-needed win. Chances didn’t really materialise though; a shot from Joao Pedro was blocked – snap –  but there was little else. We found it difficult to penetrate Newcastle’s two banks of players. God knows what Kevin Keegan would have made of it all.

There was an odd substitution on sixty-one minutes; arguably our best player Caicedo was replaced by “half-a-game” Romeo Lavia.

On sixty-eight minutes, a really fine save from Sanchez down at The Shed denied Gordon. Just after, a Delap run in the inside-right channel but his shot came to nothing. Just after, a delightful cross from Reece found Cucurella who set up Delap. Alas, his effort from merely yards away was unceremoniously booted over the crossbar.

We screamed in anguish. This was the golden chance.

Damn it.

Then, a corner was cleared, Reece crossed the ball in again, but the ball went wide.

On eighty-two minutes, Jorrel Hato replaced Fofana.

Four minutes later, Chalobah met a James corner with a high leap at the far post – snap – but the ball sailed high and wide.

Fackinell.

Then, another Delap chance; a header, over.

The narrative is clear here, isn’t it? Half-chance followed half-chance, but our finishing was woeful.

Eight minutes of added time were signalled, and I remained – stupidly, naively, pathetically – optimistic. Two minutes in, a free kick was awarded in a good area. Messrs Palmer and James met in a two-man huddle thirty yards out to discuss who would take the kick. In the end, the captain shot.

There was a roar and I was up celebrating but could then hardly believe that it had not caused the net to ripple and flutter.

Ballbags.

One last chance, a looper from Joao Pedro from a Palmer cross that nestled apologetically on the roof of the net.

Sigh.

We lost 0-1.

Newcastle finally had our number.

There were more boos at the final whistle.

Despite that ridiculous rollcall of chances, did we ever look like scoring?

I bumped into Long Tall Pete on the Fulham Road and he suggested not.

We had been poor. Newcastle were no great shakes either. It was another example, in a long, long list, of games that just failed to entertain us all.

Just after meeting up with Pete, I spotted the world’s most pathetic and useless sign, which was advising pedestrians as they walked along the road to do the following:

“PLEASE KEEP TO YOUR LEFT OR RIGHT.”

And I immediately thought how this had summed up our play not only on this day, but on many others too. Don’t worry about hitting players early with a direct ball up the middle, to keep defences worried about how to defend, nor hit incisive passes forward into the path of breaking midfielders, but just keep passing laterally to your left and to your right, ad infinitum, ad nauseum.

If there was one thing that had made the game slightly bearable it was the occasional glimpse of the sublime talent that is Cole Palmer. He wasn’t exceptional, nor even great, but there were moments when he mesmerised both his markers, and me, and this was no mean feat on a day of such poor play.  

If this game had been played forty years ago and had not been on TV in every nation that wanted to see it, the result would have not merited much of a debate.

“I see Chelsea lost at home. Did you go?”

“Yeah, never looked like scoring. Just couldn’t put many moves together. Cole Palmer was worth the admission money, mind.”

In 2026, immediately after kick-off, millions of words were exchanged about our inadequacies, and everything seemed magnificently overblown. I am all for debate and appraisal and all, but sometimes I just want to scream at the levels of toxicity. Inside the stadium, we had hardly played our part, leaving it unfashionably late to start to cheer the team on. But such is modern football and the dynamics have changed.

I have written over two million words on this website about Chelsea games and I fully suspect thousands have been written about the decay of the Stamford Bridge atmosphere. Our traditional support has become older and less likely to engage in boisterous singing, while our newer generation of fans have perhaps become spoilt or even blasé, plus there is the view that clueless visitors from foreign fields do not understand the fan culture, nor add to the atmosphere. Crucially, there are real fears that our bedrock support is being priced out. All those factors play a part in the terrible demise of our matchday atmosphere.

There has also been a subtle shift in attitude. As I have said before, we used to go as supporters. Now everyone is a bloody expert.

Among all this doom and gloom, I still think that we are just a decent goalkeeper and an experienced central defender away from competing, but that just might be the naïve and overly optimistic me. Can Clearlake commit to that? It doesn’t match their model – buying young kids for resale – and that is the big problem. But surely if we fixed those two areas, we would increase our chances to make money which is all that they bloody care about.

Right then, who’s going to the second leg against that French lot on Tuesday?

See you there.

Tales From The Men In Black

Aston Villa vs. Chelsea : 4 March 2026.

Chelsea were amid a run of away games against Arsenal, Aston Villa, Wrexham and Paris St. Germain; this midweek fixture at Villa Park was being talked about within many Chelsea circles as a “must win” game, bearing in mind Villa’s place in the league – just ahead of us – but also because they were on a run of poor form.

This had been a simple enough flit up the M5 for me – via a curry at “The Vine” in West Bromwich – and I was parked-up on Bragg Road around fifteen minutes from the away turnstiles at 6.30pm. I fastened my coat and walked east. Kick-off was an hour away.

It was the usual scene at Villa Park; the police vans parked on the roundabout where Witton Road meets Aston Lane, the approach along Witton Lane, the bloke with the “God Is Love” placard, the red bricked buildings, the souvenir sellers, the floodlights in the distance. I did notice a new pre-match hospitality area as I got closer, a good use of those old existing buildings. Villa have plans to enlarge the existing North Stand, and they have plenty of space to enlarge the hospitality areas further.

I was sat in the second row alongside John; alas Alan and Gary could not make this one. Parky and PD were down in the lower tier.

The famous old stadium slowly filled, and we were soon treated to the usual pre-match rituals at Villa of “Hi-Ho Aston Villa”, flames, and fireworks, and dear old Ozzy belting out “Crazy Train.” Other clubs – yes, including ours – have gone for the “Flames & Fireworks” as a pre-curser to the match, but Villa have taken it to a different level. If you were to rate their pre-match claret and sky-blue pyrotechnic trickery, it would certainly be top of the pile. In fact, Villa are so desperate for silverware these days that we might soon find this in their honours section of their match programme.

Amid the sulphurous fumes, the teams made their way onto the pitch.

Liam Rosenior had chosen this team :

Filip Jorgensen

Malo Gusto – Wesley Fofana – Trevoh Chalobah – Jorrel Hato

Reece James – Moises Caicedo

Cole Palmer – Enzo Fernandez – Alejandro Garnacho

Joao Pedro

Was Robert Sanchez injured or dropped?

We were dressed in our all-black kit, and I had immediate memories of us in that colour at this venue in other years, most memorably the Frank Lampard game in 2013 when he equalled and then surpassed Bobby Tambling’s 202 goals. I also, and oddly, remembered the black-shirted Alexandre Pato’s penalty kick in a 4-0 win in 2016.

The game began with us attacking the towering Holte End. I spent the first few moments trying to work out who was where on the right side of the field. Was Reece at right back, but able to push into midfield with Malo Gusto as a right-sided attacker – unlikely, I know – or was Gusto at right back, with Reece alongside Caicedo in midfield? The positioning of Enzo and Palmer seemed to confuse me more than help me. I think it was the initial position of Gusto, so high on that far side, that had baffled me. Within those first fleeting moments, we had won a corner but then got caught on a rapid break from the home team. I took a couple of photos of Leon Bailey teasing away down below us. He got the better of Hato and drove a low ball into the box, where Douglas Luiz delicately and deftly touched it past Jorgensen.

Only three minutes had passed, and we were already 0-1 down.

Fackinell.

I was shell-shocked.

The home support was enlivened.

“Holte Enders in the skoy.”

Two minutes later, Garnacho on the left curled a great cross over for Joao Pedro to head down but Emilano Martinez saved well.

Soon after, at a Chelsea corner, we noticed how the Villa team left four players up, and of course it meant we had less numbers in attack. It was a new and novel approach to defending corners, though I seem to remember Jose Mourinho leaving three up in his first stint with us.

Palmer shot weakly at Martinez on a quarter of an hour, and up until now our support was getting increasingly frustrated with the slow approach play from the back. Chalobah must have touched the ball more than anyone else in this period.

“Get it forward!”

I heard that Arsenal were 1-0 up at Brighton and I told John “I hate football.”

On twenty-one minutes, another chance for Palmer inside the box after a great ball into him, but his finish was as weak as before. Then, two minutes later, and with Chelsea picking up the pace and finding some good angles and spaces, a lovely move set up Enzo, but his effort was hit tamely at Martinez. By now, Garnacho was getting more and more involved out wide and giving Matty Cash a real test.

The game was hotting up. We had, also, quietened their crowd, always a good sign.

Out on the far side of the pitch was Ian Maatsen, our former player, and I could not help noticing how short he seemed in comparison to the other players. I had only been commenting to Alan, I think, at a recent home game how we never see short players at football these days. It’s a mark of the modern game; how most players need to be tall and physically strong, and especially fast, in this era. Gone are the days when will o’ the wisp players…cheeky wingers, midfield dynamos…were everywhere…our own Pat Nevin, our own Mickey Thomas, our own Gianfranco Zola spring to mind. All these players – and Maatsen – were 5’6” and it’s an oddity that there seems to be a shortage – sorry! – of these players today.

Maybe I noticed Maatsen because I am 5’6” too.

We continued to be press forward.

Just after the half-hour I turned to John to say “it’s a much better game now.”

We had thrown off our shackles and were now having a real go at Villa. There was a shot from the energetic Garnacho, and the Chelsea choir were now getting behind the men in black. But Villa were still an occasional threat and Ollie Watlkins perhaps should have tested Jorgensen better when one-on-one.

On thirty-five minutes, a wonderful ball from Enzo was sent over the Villa defence to the onrushing Gusto. He spotted the run of Joao Pedro and I sensed a goal. I mouthed “here we go” at the exact moment that he arrived to slide the ball home.  

GET IN YOU BEAUTY.

More Chelsea pressure, Garnacho revelling in the space out wide.

“Go on son, get past him.”

Cash was being run from arsehole to breakfast time.

In the third minute of added time, Hato – who was enjoying a very solid game – dribbled into the Villa box with ease but his shot was blocked.

Then, a rapid Villa break, and I kept an eye on the passage of play, trying to spot if an offside was about to happen. The ball was passed out to Ollie Watkins who struck the ball past Jorgensen. The Villa hordes roared again,

To me, it looked onside. Thankfully, VAR ruled otherwise. Phew.

Then, with five minutes of added time played, Chelsea were again knocking on the door, and Garnacho was involved once more. He found Enzo who wriggled into some space and lifted an exquisite ball into Joao Pedro. He nonchalantly guided the ball past Martinez.

Now it was our turn to roar again.

Then, to our horror, VAR was called in to rule on a potential offside.

Nah. The goal stood.

At the break, we were 2-1 to the good.

“Great recovery that, John.”

I just hoped that we could continue in the same fashion. Sometimes we just can’t seem to play two consecutive halves in the same way, can we?

Joe Cole, with former Chelsea fan Peter Crouch on TV duty, were spotted a few times and Joey walked over to pose for some photos with a few Chelsea supporters in the break.

Before the second period, more “Crazy Train” and another Chelsea huddle on the centre-circle that seemed to irritate the Villa players.

The second half began, and there were two early chances for Garnacho but he spurned them both.

On fifty-five minutes, we broke when Caicedo won a ball inside our half and we moved the ball quickly – no honest, we did, I was there – via Palmer and Joao Pedro and found Reece on the wing. His low cross was punched away by Martinez, but only as far as Palmer. The Palmer of old – er, two seasons ago – would have struck it home easily, whereas the little less confident Palmer of 2026 might struggle. I watched to see which version would prevail.

He struck the ball with venom. Its trajectory was unhindered. The back of the net rippled.

GET IN.

I watched Palmer cup his ear as if to say “what’s that you been saying about me?” and then saw his trademark celebration.

Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap.

“Palmer again, ole, ole.”

We were 3-1 up.

Beautiful.

We continued to purr, and the Chelsea fans were energised and happy. This was just how I wanted us to play. With more freedom. With more pace. With more style.

Chelsea is all about style.

But this was still an open game – Mourinho would have hated it – and chances for Palmer and Garnacho were matched occasionally by Villa. Watkins was put through, one on one with Jorgensen but he dallied, enabling Chalobah to twist his body and dig out the ball, a fine piece of defending.

On sixty-three minutes, former blues Jadon Sancho and Ross Barkley were among the three substitutions made by Villa.

A minute later, Caicedo – from deep – swept the ball out to Gusto, who touched it to Palmer. His trusted left peg floated the ball out to Garnacho. I photographed his surging run, deep into the box, and watched as he very unselfishly played the ball square to Joao Pedro who guided the ball in, his hat-trick.

The goal immediately reminded me of that Lampard goal from 2013.

The scorer raced over to the Chelsea section, and I was lucky enough to capture his beatific smiles.

4-1.

Fackinell.

Not long after, there was an audacious bicycle kick from Joao Pedro.

On seventy-two minutes, Tammy Abraham came on and so Villa now had four ex-Chelsea players in their eleven.

In the last fifteen minutes, Rosenior rang the changes.

75 minutes : Romeo Lavia for Gusto.

79 minutes : Marc Cucurella for Enzo.

79 minutes : Tosin Adarabioyo for Fofana,

85 minutes : Liam Delap for Joao Pedro.

85 minutes : Andrey Santos for Palmer.

John and I had a little laugh about Lavia and his unfortunate habit of getting injured. I envisaged a scenario where he is chosen to start a game and lasts the entire match. He comes into the Chelsea dressing room at the end of the game and sits on the bench alongside his teammates.

Liam Rosenior sees him and asks “what the fuck are you doing here?”

With the game won, and the number of changes, it was no surprise that the game drifted towards the end. It was nice to see the former Chelsea players again, and Barkley had a trademark shuffle through the middle and shot.

“I can actually see them scoring” I said to Gary, just as Barkley floated a ball in and Abraham leapt to head the ball on to the top of the bar.

In the stadium, the home fans were drifting away, and the Chelsea crowd aired the “fire drill” chant.

The game finished and the men in black had triumphed. This was a lovely surprise, a great Chelsea performance – admittedly against an increasingly disheartened Villa team – and a perfect response to the doom mongers after Arsenal. The plaudits must got to Joao Pedro and his sublime touch, and his ability to drift in and score, but Garnacho was a revelation, his best game for us by a country mile. A special mention for Hato, too; what a polished performance.

I was able to take a selection of photographs at the end as the Chelsea players celebrated down below. I loved the way Enzo was serenaded. He has many admirers at Chelsea. And I loved how we sang Tammy’s name as he walked, slightly, towards us. The photo of him with Trevoh is my favourite of the whole night.

And so that was that. A great away win in a “must-win” game, and a nice fillip before trips to Wales and France.

Oh, there were three extra bits of drama that I won’t bore you with that took place during the afternoon and evening involving Parky’s ‘phone, my SLR camera and my wallet.

“I still can’t download the ticket. I reckon I’m knackered.”

“You can’t bring that camera in. There’s a “drop-off” place just over there.”

“The team are doing a sweep of the stadium; it’s going to be an hour mate. Will you wait here to see if we can find it?”

Thankfully, everything worked out.

Next up, a first-ever trip for me to Wrexham.

Stay tuned.