Tales From A Nervous Night

Posted on May 21, 2026 by Chris Axon

Chelsea vs. Tottenham Hotspur : 19 May 2026.

Chelsea vs. Tottenham. It gets the pulses racing, eh?

It’s always a key fixture every single season against “that lot”, but this one could have been so much bigger, and so much better. If only we could have been able to relegate them on this fourteenth anniversary of “Munich Day.”

If only they hadn’t picked up sufficient points in recent weeks…if only.

If is a big word.

I was up bright and early for another 6am to 2pm shift which would enable me to reach London in good time for the 8.15pm kick-off. After my spate of bad luck occurrences leading up to Saturday’s Cup Final, I wasn’t too happy about seeing seven individual magpies within a three-quarter of a mile stretch of road at the bottom of Bonnyleigh Hill between Frome and Beckington at about 5.30am.

Seven of the buggers!

You could say I was spitting feathers.

But maybe I would have been more worried if I had seen seven cockerels.

As the morning developed, I contemplated the potential enormity of the day. Should Manchester City draw at Bournemouth, Arsenal would become champions for the first time since 2004. If Tottenham were to draw at Stamford Bridge, they would relegate West Ham United, bar a mathematical miracle on the last day of the season.

This could be a day of destiny.

All of this was happening with the backdrop of Chelsea Football Club naming Xabi Alonso as our new manager – not coach, an important difference – on the Sunday after the FA Cup Final. In some ways, it felt that we did not deserve him, what with the way we have ridiculously hired and fired coaches over the last four years. It has been a comedy show, and we have collectively suffered from the constant laughter aimed our way from outside the club.

Alonso is one of Europe’s most respected new coaches. We have done very well to nab him, especially since I am sure that many Liverpool supporters were eying him up as a successor to the unloved Arne Slot.

When I came into work on the Monday, it was noticeable that the several Liverpool supporters in the office, rather than engaging with me about our loss in the Cup Final, were avoiding eye contact.

I think we all know why.

I thought about going up to each one of them and asking them a question :

“So, do I pronounce his name Zavvy, or Zabbi?”

But I resisted the thrill of seeing their teeth grinding and their eyes blubbing.

I worked an early shift, and took PD and Parky along the for the ride as per normal. At Reading Services, after Saturday’s escapade, I was relieved to see that I had used pump #9.

Phew.

I made my way into London and dipped into an Italian for a quick bite on Vanston Place.

The pre-match was spent in the packed and stifling “Tommy Tucker” where we were joined by surprise guests Foxy – and his amazing technicolour haircut – and Drew from Dundee, and George from Czechia. Talk was equally concerned with our stay on Tyneside & Wearside at the weekend as it was with the evening’s game. I was so hot that I only lasted an hour in the pub. I was inside the stadium at 7.15pm, a full hour before kick-off. At that stage in the evening, only a few hundred souls were inside.

Outside at CFCUK stall, I had briefly chatted to CFC writers Marco and Tim; they agreed with me that we were ridiculously lucky to have been able to acquire Alonso.

I chatted with Big John about that beautiful game against Tottenham in 2016 when we came back from trailing 0-2 at the break to draw 2-2 and to deny them their first league title since 1961. How can that be ten years ago?

John said that the game “had it all.”

I replied : “Yes it did, including three thousand miserable Tottenham pricks.”

Unfortunately, both Alan and Clive could not attend this one, but it was a pleasure to welcome Daryl to The Sleepy Hollow who had picked up Alan’s ticket late on. I can’t remember the last time we had watched a game next to each other; maybe at a New York Mets game in 2015.

The stadium filled, the players did their pre-match runs and stretches down below us, and with about ten minutes to go to kick-off, there was a rumble of “Oh when the Spurs…” in the rear reaches of the lower tier of the away section.

Joao Pedro was presented with his “Player of the Year” award; he would have received my vote for sure.

Calum McFarlane decided upon this eleven, and we found it odd that neither Levi Colwill nor Joao Pedro were featured.

Sanchez

Acheampong – Fofana – Hato – Cucurella

Caicedo – Santos

Neto – Palmer – Fernandez

Delap

The minutes ticked by, and the seats that were unused around me thankfully filled.

The usual fizzbombs, flames and flashes.

Then “The Liquidator” and I joined in with the “We Hate Tot’num” chant which was louder than bombs.

But a slight concern and a slight worry; oddly Tottenham chose to wear their all-yellow away kit, with a navy yoke, and it brought back instant horrific memories of their visit in November 1978.

They had risen to the First Division after one year in the second flight in 1977/78 and shocked the football world with the acquisition of Argentina’s two World Cup Winners Osvaldo Ardiles and Ricardo Villa. Despite seeing Tottenham at home in 1974, I wanted to see them again in only my tenth game at Stamford Bridge. It was a supremely hot ticket; these two signings had captured the imagination of the entire football world, and I couldn’t wait to see Ardiles, especially. Stamford Bridge was stretched to its limit with a gate of 41,594. Chelsea went ahead with an overhead goal from Tommy Langley, but to my sadness the visitors – in an all-yellow kit with navy trim on their chest – came back to win 3-1. The aggro inside Stamford Bridge before the game had been the stuff of legend, and the whole arena was a bowl of animosity. The visitors from N17 packed out the entire northern terrace and their loud chant of “We are Tottenham from the Lane” would haunt me for years.

The game kicked off and thankfully there was no modern-day equivalent of Osvaldo Ardiles nor Glenn Hoddle in this Tottenham team.

Both teams had a few early approaches into each other’s penalty boxes. It was ridiculous how my mind’s eye played ridiculous tricks with my brain; Robert Sanchez was dressed in all orange, with his protective cap, and the Cech vibes were uncanny.

Both Daryl and I were upset with the widespread booing of Conor Gallagher; some of our fans are absolute fools.

Conor did not want to leave Chelsea. His whole family are supporters of the club. When it was clear that the hierarchy wanted to cash in on him – and I suspect that this action acted as a major factor in Pochettino leaving – he must have felt betrayed. He chose Atletico Madrid when Tottenham, allegedly, first came sniffing. I bet my life that he hated signing for them.

I felt for him.

I said to Daryl “he’s no Gordon Durie, after all.”

Indeed, he wasn’t. Durie wanted to head north, closer to his family in Scotland, so imagine our surprise and disgust when he didn’t choose the north, but the North Circular instead. His move to Tottenham in the summer of 1991 is still infamous thirty-five years later. Never has a former Chelsea player been as vilified by us as he was at White Hart Lane in the August of that year.

A cross from Tottenham right was deflected just wide of our goal by Jorrel Hato. Not long after, Mathys Tel – whoever he is – met a cross with a diving header and at first glance it looked like Sanchez had performed a fantastic reflex save at his post. The replay showed that he did not lay a finger on it; we heaved a sigh of relief.

There was a shot from Cole Palmer that curled at the Shed End goal, but the wonderfully named Antonin Kinsky was able to palm away.

It is not known if he was wearing Kinsky boots.

On eighteen minutes, the ball was floated up to Palmer who had drifted to the right. I saw that he needed help, so yelped out

“Go on support him.”

With that Pedro Neto raced forward to carry out my instructions perfectly.

Neto drifted inside and then played the ball to Enzo, who – without hesitation – decided to take aim and shoot at goal. The ball was hit from thirty yards out and flew into the net’ dropping into the corner at the last moment.

How we celebrated.

The place erupted.

I had taken a photo of the shot but it’s way too blurred to share here; the subsequent photos of his euphoric match down to the corner flag are a tad better.

This was fantastic. We were up 1-0 against the old enemy, and life was suddenly good again.

The visitors tried their best to get into promising positions, but our defenders were solid and tenacious when needed. To be honest, I thought we bossed the middle part of the half. Joas Acheampong, who has lots of admirers within our support, made some fine tackles and blocks. The pugnacious Cucurella, on the other flank, too.

I took two photos of a free kick that was awarded to us out on our left. First, Enzo standing over the ball focussing on the task ahead, and my photo in focus too. Second, the ball rebounding in a blur off the crossbar, with Kinsky beaten. Alas, too blurred to share. It again needed a TV replay for us to realise a ‘keeper had not managed to get a hand on the ball and that the goal’s frame saved the defending team.

The Tottenham support was gloriously quiet.

Tel was playing with one thigh ridiculously exposed, and it looked like he had tucked one leg of his shorts into his Y-fronts. I wondered if this was his thing, his superstition; maybe a little like how Wayne Grettzky used to tuck his NHL jersey in on one side.

The visitors enjoyed a fair proportion of the ball in the first half but didn’t look composed in possession. They rarely troubled us.

Daryl told me how he changed trains on his way in from Essex at Tower Hill, and that there were no eastbound trains on the District Line for a while. Apparently, a voice on the Tannoy announced that there was a points failure at West Ham.

I still don’t know if he was serious or not.

Late on in the half, a lone strike from Palmer whistled wide of the far post.

At the break, the consensus was that we had played well enough and that Tottenham were poor. Gallagher had not really been too involved. Out of interest, we had heard early in the evening that Bournemouth were beating City 1-0, and although this news did not go down too well, just imagine what the N17 contingent made of it; not only was their game going against them, but Arsenal were close to gaining their first league title for over two decades.

The second half began with Chelsea attacking us in the Matthew Harding.

Tottenham had more of the ball, and their supporters reacted with a sustained period of noise. Their small selection of songs was aired; you know the ones.

Their infamous “Yid Army” chant was loud, and I still feel uneasy hearing it.

Richarlison was involved in two half-chances and for a while, we had seemed to shrink into ourselves a little. However, as the noise from the away section grew, I was really pleased and proud with the way that the home crowd responded so loudly.

“CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA.”

I made my own special little contribution.

“Get in the game Chels.”

Someone must have heard me; we dug in and reacted nicely.

We were on the back foot no longer.

On sixty-seven minutes, we gathered possession from an errant Tottenham pass and Palmer was able to roam forward into lots of space; I picked up my camera, sixth-sensing a special moment. I caught his run on film. The ball was played out to Neto on the right, and he spotted two Chelsea bodies at the back post. Perhaps the cross was aimed at Delap, but Enzo was able to knock the ball back towards Santos as it fell short.

He swiped at the ball, I clicked my camera, Kinsky was beaten and the net rippled.

The place roared and so did I. I jumped up to the platform to my left and punched the air with both fists. I then realised that the scorer was running towards Enzo, down below us, and my camera clicked into action.

Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap.

Our goal arrived at just the right time.

For a few moments, Stamford Bridge resembled the Stamford Bridge of old, and I buzzed at the greatness of it all.

If only all atmospheres could be like the one enveloping our famous old ground.

Just after, Tottenham made a triple substitution that included James Maddison and his COVID hair.

Sadly, on seventy-three minutes, a ball came in from the Tottenham right and there was a smart back-heel – from afar, it wasn’t unlike that of Semenyo at Wembley – that played in Richarlison. Both Daryl and I were hoping that an off-side flag would be raised, but no. The former Everton man slotted it home.

The lead was now slender; 2-1. It meant that if Tottenham scored one more, they would be safe from relegation.

A substitution was made on seventy-four minutes; Trevoh Chalobah for Acheampong.

What followed was a super-nervy period of over twenty minutes, taking in the seven minutes of injury time. Rarely have I felt so consumed by nerves and anxiety.

Elsewhere, Manchester City scored a ridiculously late equaliser, but the damage was done; Arsenal were Champions.

Yawn.

This was the match that counted.

On eighty-one minutes, Mamadou Sarr replaced Fofana.

In an almost comedic moment, Delap was put through on goal in a race with a defender, but he too easily brought his hands up and blatantly pushed his combatant. What a bloody fool. He was booked.

This is a familiar Delap ploy. I remembered similar actions at Wrexham and Wembley; coming on as a late substitute, his first actions in both games were to manhandle an opponent with a shove in the back.

Pathetic.

A friend in the US soon sent me a WhatsApp message:

“Chris. Serious question. Have you ever seen a lower IQ player at Chelsea than Delap?”

I didn’t reply immediately but soon told him; “nerves in tatters.”

Three more substitutions took place on eighty-nine minutes, and I seriously doubted if this was wise.

Alejandro Garnacho for Neto.

Dario Essugo for Palmer.

Shim Mheuka for Delap.

We were now Delapidated, but hopefully not dilapidated.

The game continued, and there seemed to be attack after attack on our goal. Thankfully all the Tottenham moves came to nothing, but we had to rely on a strong Hato block on Maddison near the goal to preserve our lead.

The final whistle was met with relief by everyone, and I soon posted on “Facebook.”

“The more things change, the more they stay the same.”

And nothing illustrates this more than our almost inhuman dominance over Tottenham Hotspur, especially in SW6, over the past thirty-six years.

I walked out past the Osgood statue, I remembered the #9 pump at the services, and I over-heard a fellow fan utter that it was a “good-ish game” and I knew exactly what he meant.

It wasn’t always top quality, and it was contested between two average teams.

Well, one average team.

But it seriously didn’t matter. We had beaten Tottenham. Their one point for safety had evaporated in the evening air. Our mighty home record against them continued unabashed.

But, oh my nerves.

See you on Sunday on Wearside.

Chelsea vs. Tottenham Hotspur.

League Games @ Stamford Bridge.

1/12/90 to 19/5/26

W – 23

D – 11

L – 1

Tales From Neverland

Posted on May 11, 2026 by Chris Axon

Liverpool vs. Chelsea : 9 May 2026.

I only finished the blog for the dire Nottingham Forest game at around 10pm on Friday. Sometimes, my brain needs a few days to put everything from a game day into some semblance of order. However, there was an early start required on the Saturday as the foot soldiers of Chelsea Football Club were due to muster just after high noon in Liverpool. The plan was to leave Dodge at 6am and get up to Anfield at 11am for the 12.30pm start.

I set my alarm for 4.45am.

The alarm sounded and I was up. But something seemed strange. Outside, it was surprisingly light. I looked again. It was 5.45am. Bollocks. I had set the incorrect time.

Now it was me doing the Corporal Jones impersonation.

There was a quick text to PD and LP; “running late, see you soon.”

I collected PD at 6.20am and LP at 6.40am and we were soon having breakfast at Strensham Services at the target time of 7.45am.

I was back on track.

The journey up to Liverpool was clouded by the shared knowledge that we were probably in for another tiresome game of football, and the chances of us losing our seventh successive game of league football was likely.

A few people had commented that Liverpool were enduring a rum old season themselves, and that we had a chance to nick a result.

I, dear reader, was far from convinced.

It was a decent run up, despite a period of rain an hour or so out. It wasn’t long before I took the slip road from the M6 to the M62; a well-travelled route.

Nearing Liverpool, the skies brightened, if not our mood in the car. For so long, trips by car to both to see away games at Liverpool and Everton were virtually the same, following virtually the same tracks. Now, with Everton decamped to a riverside site, the final few miles to each team’s stadium will now be different. With the Liverpool stadium capacity now at 61,276, cars are forced to park further out. We spotted cars being parked on kerbs and on verges, for free, a good mile and a half walk away from Anfield. On Utting Avenue, just east of “The Arkles” I spotted a little place that I used to use was now charging a whopping £25.

I dropped the lads off outside “The Arkles” – a famous pub for away fans going to both Anfield and Goodison over the years – and I was pleased with my timing; it was a couple of minutes past 11am. I then skirted Stanley Park and was able to park up in a tried and trusted car park near Goodison, although I was shocked that the fee had shot up to £20.

The familiar walk across the gently sloping rise of Stanley Park towards the steel of Anfield took me fifteen minutes, and I arrived at the stadium at 11.30am.

There was a sound system blaring out some Liverpool songs at the top of the park, and it was odd for me to hear a song about “Fernando Torres, Liverpool’s Number Nine”; I wondered if their ill-feelings towards him have faded over the years.

Approaching Anfield, virtually the first face that I saw was of Stuart, who lives in a village just three and a half miles away from my house in Somerset. I often capture him in my photos as he sits in the front row behind The Shed goal. We had a brief chat about our – slim – chances.

With time to kill, I embarked on a quick tour around the perimeter of Anfield, which now covers a much larger footprint compared to my first visit in May 1985. The expansion of the red brick and silver steel behemoth has caused the demolition of many terraced streets that used to hug the old stadium.

I took a selection of photos to bulk out my day’s harvest, since I was only using my sub-standard “pub camera” and I knew that the game photos wouldn’t be of much worth. I noted a few additions that I had not spotted before. There were concrete benches honouring former Liverpool heroes – I took a photo of one dedicated to Bill Shankly – under the mass of the giant Main Stand, and a statue depicting John Houlding who formed the club in 1892.

It must irk some Liverpool supporters that they were formed some fourteen years after Everton. In comparison, it doesn’t irk me in the slightest that Chelsea were formed twenty-six years after Fulham. It is interesting, though, that without Everton refusing to pay a higher rent at Anfield and without the Fulham board refusing to move to Stamford Bridge, neither Chelsea nor Liverpool clubs would exist.

Close by, a memorial garden for Diogo Jota who died in July 2025.

On the exterior of The Kop, there are images of players and branding splashed on windows of the club shop.

The phrase “Never Done” was used and my guess is that this uses “You’ll Never Walk Alone” as its starting point.

I continued the wordplay and grumbled to myself “might as well call this place Neverland because we never fucking win here.”

This was my twenty-ninth visit to Anfield with Chelsea and I had only witnessed five wins.

1 February 1992 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 2

8 May 2009 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 3

2 May 2010 : Liverpool 0 Chelsea 2

27 April 2014 : Liverpool 0 Chelsea 2

8 November 2014 : Liverpool 1 Chelsea 2

We have had our moments – featuring some truly massive wins – but they have been fleeting.

I took a photo of the upper mast of Brunel’s Great Eastern ship which has acted as a flagpole at Anfield for decades and marks the sire where my mate Pete and I, in true Scouser fashion, slipped in for free at half-time to watch on the old Kop to witness the first of those wins in 1992.

The Centenary Stand, where I watched the Paul Elliot leg break in 1992, became the Sir Kenny Dalglish Stand a few years back, and who is to say this two-tiered structure will gain another level before long?

At the rear of this stand is a simple plaque remembering the events of 29 May 1985. I touched the Juventus crest. My Italian mate had a ticket in the infamous Section Z at Heysel but – thank God – was unable to attend the match due to an excess of schoolwork that week.

I skirted the final corner and walked under the repositioned “Shankly Gates” – forged in Frome in Somerset and revealed in December 1982 – that used to be in the north-west corner but now sit in the north-east corner.

I membered how the old “Annie Road” stand used to abut the road of its name, but the footprint of the ultra-new Anfied Road Stand has stamped all over those memories.

Then, the final corner, the away entrance, and the scene was awash with orange-jacketed stewards. A quick frisk down, and I was in. It was bang on midday. As I have rudely commented before, for all of the new space due to the extension of this stand, the away concourse is as big as it was in 1985, with very cramped facilities.

I made my way to my seat in row nine but strangely did not spot a single face that I recognised in the concourse. Then, out of nowhere:

“Chris!”

It was Brian, a Chelsea fan that I had not met before, from Chicago, and I felt embarrassed that I did not recognise him despite being mates on “Facebook”. He thanked me for these never-ending tales, and I appreciated the kind words. It was his first visit to Anfield.

Once inside the away enclosure, I was surprised with how hot it was, with the sun beating down, and I began to rue wearing a black hoody. My friend Kim called by for a quick chat; she picked up a last-minute ticket and had the luxury of being able to walk from her mearby house to a Chelsea game.

Alas, there was no Alan, no Gary and no John alongside me on this occasion. I took a few photos of the starters and then the substitutes going through their routines.

The teams entered the pitch, and the flags were waved in The Kop. I didn’t think “You’ll Never Walk Alone” was song with much gusto on this occasion. Scarves were held aloft. It’s their thing.

Right, our team. I had not seen it announced prior to the start of the game, and as the players lined-up, I first thought that we had gone for a 3/4/3 for some reason, with Cucurella and Gusto the wide men outside Hato, the returning Colwill and Fofana, then Caicedo and Santos in the middle, with Enzo and Palmer supporting Joao Pedro.

As always, we attacked The Kop in the first half, and that entire end was engulfed in a large and hazy grey shadow making it difficult to spot details.

We began brightly, and Cole Palmer wriggled into the box on the left and forced a save from the Liverpool ‘keeper Giorgi Mamardashvili, whoever he is.

Then, a Liverpool break, and a foul in a central position. The free kick was some way out, and Dominic Szoboslai’s thumping effort was blocked but the ball ran to Rio Ngumoha not so many yards away from me. Palmer seemed to be doing a good job in stopping a cross. Alas, the ball was played back to Ryan Gravenberch, and he touched the ball inside, aimed, and struck. I did not see the ball go in.

I just heard it.

The home sections roared.

It was their first shot on goal and we were 0-1 down.

My reaction? I bowed my head and just stood silent and still, looking down at my jeans and my trainers for what seemed like an eternity. I did not want to see the smiles on the faces of the Liverpool players, nor the grins on the faces of the red clad hordes. I was deeply sad, too. I just needed my own moment.

Only six minutes were on the clock; or rather those four minimalist electronic clocks that are angled above all four corner flags at Anfield and have become part of my personal nightmare on virtually every trip to this stadium.

Soon into the game, I formed a little self-help group with a familiar face in front – name unknown – with his young son and two young lads from Bradford behind me. We were soon berating Gusto for not taking the ball past his marker into tons of open space ahead, and also the lack of movement, yet again, from our attackers.

We carved out a half-chance at the far post, but then Liverpool came again. A corner on the far side was taken short, and Szoboslai swung in a high cross from deep. There were two Liverpool players unmarked on the far post, and the ball dropped for the second one in line. Virgil van Dijk bounced a shot against the turf and it flew over the bar.

We tried to obtain a foothold. There was a fine run from Palmer, who passed to Joao Pedro, but the ball was just too close to the Liverpool ‘keeper.

On twenty minutes, applause broke out, and I guessed that this was in memory of Diogo Jota. If I had taken the right amount of attention I would have realiosed that his shirt number was 20. A decent number of us joined in.

I kept trying to check the shape of the team as the half progressed, but it was not easy being so low in the stands. Cucurella, out left, really was playing in a very advanced role on that flank.

And he was having a fine game as the half-developed, and – whisper it – we became the stronger of the two teams. From the twentieth minute to the thirtieth minute, we were much better, playing the ball intelligently to feet, then picking good passes into space.

It was unnerving.

“CAM ON CHELS.”

On the half-hour, a run in behind from the energetic Cucurella and he forced a save from Mamardashvili. A second chance for him came too, but the ‘keeper was on form.

I turned to the lads behind; “we’re playing well, here, you know.”

Despite a volley of abuse when Liverpool took the lead, the home fans were quiet, and even nervously so. Anfield is rarely the cauldron of noise that the media would like us to believe (although in fairness, what ground is these days?) and it was easy to detect their frustrations with the manager and his way of playing.

Whereas Klopp’s modus operandi pleased the Anfield faithful, this was not a well-oiled Slot machine.

As the first half developed, their fans seemed even more frustrated than us.

We were awarded a free-kick out on our right, and I decided to snap a few photos. Enzo stood with Palmer. As Enzo stroked the ball goalwards, I snapped again. Unbelievably, the ball seemed to go unhindered through a packed penalty area and – much to our astonished joy – we screamed our delight as it crept in at the far post.

There were hints of laughter amongst the noise emanating from the Anfield Road.

Thirty-five minutes were on the clocks.

Just after, a fine pass from Moises Caicedo presented Enzo with another chance, but the ‘keeper was able to block.

This was excellent stuff from us. It was lovely to see a few trademark twists and turns from Palmer, hopefully getting back to his best, and it was a joy to see him create space out of nowhere. Elsewhere, Cucurella was continually raiding the left flank, and I settled with the notion of him being the advanced wide man ahead of Hato at left-back. Levi Colwill was a commanding figure at the back, and Caicedo – whose form has dipped the past few months – was back to his best.

It really was a very promising show.

At half-time, I detected a rumble of discontent from The Kop; yes, boos.

At half-time, I sought refuge out of the heat and disappeared into the concourse. Here, two acquaintances were discussing our encouraging display, and one reckoned that our upturn in form came when both sets of supporters applauded Jota. It was an interesting take.

My throat was parched, and I gulped down some water then returned to my place in row nine. Back at my seat, a blast from the past when these tales were forming on the Chelsea In America website in 2008; a half-time Burger.

“Good to see you mate.”

Soon into the second period, a fine Caicedo pass to Cucurella had us excited, and I snapped a shot as he took the ball on. His pass square was lost to me, but I saw the ball rebound out to Palmer who smashed the ball home.

Fackinell, la.

We were up 2-1.

At Anfield.

The celebrations were but yards away and I snapped away. In one very blurred photo Enzo is seen doing his own “cold Palmer.”

“That’s just the ball I want to see played” I said to anyone who was listening. It was magnificent, dissecting time and space, and cutting out three defenders.

The away end was on fire.

And then, a minute or so after the goal, I looked up to see “VAR Review” and we were stopped in our tracks.

“Always the last to know.”

The decision hurt; offside.

Bollocks.

At the other end, a cross deep into our box and Curtis Jones headed home from close range, but the misery was short-lived as an offside flag was soon raised.

Phew.

Liverpool rallied in the second period, but although they enjoyed the lion share of possession, I noted nervousness and displeasure from many of the home fans. I don’t think I had ever heard Anfield so quiet. The away end was hardly boiling over with noise although we did have moments. There was the standard anti-Clearlake and anti-Eghbali chants, but I found it noticeable that the Chelsea support was not so keen to air the usual anti-Liverpool rhetoric.

I thought to myself “we’ve actually found something we dislike more than this lot.”

Szoboszlai thumped a long range effort against the base of Jorgensen’s left-hand post.

On the hour, a bloody fantastic save from Filip Jorgensen – not really tested apart from the goal – as he sprung to turn a blast from that man Szoboszlai around the post.

I kept looking at the clock.

“Come on. Ticktock.”

On sixty-three minutes, Callum McFarlane replaced Andrey Santos with Reece James. There was much applause from us.

“He’s one of our own.”

There was a different response from the home fans on sixty-eight minutes when crowd favourite Ngumoha was replaced by Alexander Isak. Boos boomed around Anfield.

Chelsea were boosted by James’ appearance and everything that he did displayed constant calmness and quality. However, I am increasingly perplexed by his role these days. I still think he is too quiet as captain, and he seems to spend a third of his time at right-back, a third in midfield and a third on the bench. He is a bit of a conundrum is Reece.

On this day, though, he was sensational for half-an-hour.

As Liverpool continued to dominate, their crowd remained quiet.

Liverpool made two substitutions of their own, but our changes were complete. The game continued, and the excellent Joao Pedro danced into the box but shot high and wide.

At the other end, van Dyke lunged at a cross and headed against the bar.

The game, though not a classic, had its moments.

On ninety minutes, Joao Pedro took hold of the ball wide on the left, then waltzed and wriggled past various Liverpool players and into the box. He continued and found himself heading towards the goal-line. A challenge came in. There was a shout from those around me though I was not convinced with my naked eyes. The move petered out.

It went to VAR.

No penalty.

We seemed to be tiring a little at the end, but we gathered strength from somewhere.

It was noticeable that, during the seven minutes of extra time, the Liverpool ‘keeper took a while to release the ball, and this drew howls of disdain from the 57,000 Liverpool fans. Of course, it reminded me so much of our play of late.

At the final whistle, loud boos from The Kop.

I’ve never heard The Kop boo a Liverpool performance before.

Mind you, having seen us win only five times in twenty-nine games, the situation never really arises.

At the end of the game, there were well wishes from a few stewards. I know it might offend some people, but I have always found the LFC match stewards to be the friendliest out there.

The consensus was that our performance had surprised us all, and we were all thankful that the run of losses in the league had ended. Whisper it, but I was proud of the lads at Anfield. This team is not the easiest to warm to, but there has been confusion everywhere once Maresca got the push this season. I hope that everyone can use this positive performance as a catalyst for another memorable day at Wembley.

We walked back down the slope to the car park near Goodison, and I began the slow drive out of the city onto the famous East Lancs Road, the M57 and then the M62. I drove through Knowsley, a suburb where Everton once pondered a site for a new stadium, but we all agreed that they are best served by their new place by the river.

We stopped for refreshments at Stafford, where Burger and Mrs. Burger have been living since 2010 after moving from Canada, and I drove on.

Eventually, I climbed the long hill to J18 of the M4 and took the usual exit to the A46 towards Bath.

“Not long to go now lads.”

Next up, a trip to the FA Cup Final.

The FA Cup Final!

I will never tire of that.

Out of interest, I close with a little graphic of my most visited away venues with Chelsea and our record at each venue.

MANCHESTER UNITED 30 5-10-15

ARSENAL 29 6-9-14

LIVERPOOL 29 5-9-15

TOTTENHAM 27 12-7-8

EVERTON 25 8-7-10

The punchline writes itself, I guess.

See you at Wembley.

Tales From A Win At Wembley

Posted on May 3, 2026 by Chris Axon

Chelsea vs. Leeds United : 26 April 2026.

After the ridiculously poor performance at Brighton on the Tuesday, he didn’t last long. He had to go, didn’t he? I am not going to dwell too much on Liam Rosenior’s ill-conceived stint as Chelsea manager, but my post on Facebook on the Wednesday sums it all up.

“Well, the bloke lost me when he came out with that ‘respect the ball’ line as he tried desperately to defend the huddles in the centre circle. Promoted way too high, he was soon way out of his depth. The circus continues.

A big part of me would love Cesc to return next season, but he would be bloody mad to report to the loons in charge. I’d hate to see his legacy spoiled.

What now, Chelsea Football Club?

And who?”

I just hope that the board’s comment about undertaking a process of self-reflection to make the right long-term appointment is genuine and not a knee-jerk comment to placate supporters.

Chelsea needs an experienced manager – coach – and while we are at it, let’s buy an experienced ‘keeper, central defender, and striker too. But mainly an experienced central defender, just like Enzo Maresca wanted in the summer.

Going into the up-coming FA Cup semi-final with Leeds United, I suddenly felt more positive without Rosenior in charge, which is certainly a sad indictment on his tenure. Calum McFarlane was to be entrusted with first team affairs, and – well – we went to Wembley with double helpings of blind faith.

“Anyone but Liam?”

Sad but true.

The weekend was to be a couple of contrasting days.

On Saturday, Frome Town were up against Portishead Town at home in the last league game of the season. With the league title, and promotion, already gained, this would be a relaxing day of celebration.

On Sunday, the stakes were higher, Chelsea were off to Wembley with a semi-final against a bitter old rival, and I was apprehensive, to say the least, about our chances.

Saturday was a joyful and relaxing day, on a perfect April afternoon. I met up with some friends for a pre-match drink, and a recurring question was about the day’s attendance. For the championship clincher against Shaftesbury a few weeks earlier, the gate was a pleasing 1,096. With promotion already secured, I wasn’t so sure that the gate against Portishead – themselves in a play-off position – would beat that.

In “The Vine Tree” pub, I liked chatting to the son of a teammate from my Oakfield school team from 1977/78. Later at the game, I would chat to Steve and Kev, two other teammates from that same team. I find these links to my childhood one of the most endearing features of my attendance at my local team’s games. There was also a brief chat with Ray, who lived in the same village as me in my childhood, and who reads all these blogs, despite being an Evertonian and not a Chelsea supporter. This made my day.

Greeting us at the turnstiles was my friend Courtney, who had flown in from Chicago’s O’Hare Airport that morning. This has been a tumultuous first season for him as Frome chairman, and after his attendance against Tavistock in August and Hartpury in November, this would be his third game of the season. It’s always a great moment to see Courtney’s smile once again.

Last season, I attended a mighty forty-two Frome Town games, but the last game of this season would only be number twenty-three. Having Chelsea play many more Saturday games did not help my Frome numbers unfortunately. From November to January, I only saw four Frome games. It has felt that I have not been as connected to Dodge this time around, despite the all-conquering season that we put together.

I must do better in 2026/27.

There was an air of celebration in the stadium throughout the afternoon; it felt like a crossover between a village fete and a charity match. But that was to be expected. The pressure was off, and it felt fine.

The crowd was a healthy one, with around one hundred away fans, complete with “Posset” – their odd nickname – flags, but I wasn’t sure if 1,096 would be breached. I caught Callum Gould’s fine early goal on film, but Portishead put up a good fight and won the game 2-1. Frome sadly finished the season with two consecutive league losses, but a total of just four in forty-two games. There was, however, a Somerset Cup win on the same evening that Chelsea was getting stuffed in Brighton. It was the club’s first-ever double.

The trophy lifts were very special moments, and I include a smattering of some of the photos from the Frome game; apologies again for the colour red.

I stayed on after the game for Player of the Year presentations in the clubhouse, thus ending a very enjoyable few hours.

Oh, the gate? 1,095, unbelievably just one shy of the Shaftesbury game.

But this left Frome with a fantastic average of 558 this season. Last season, in a higher level – Step 3 – it was 510. Next season we will be playing more local teams in the Southern League Premier, so I fully expect our average gate to rise to 600.

At Step 3 in 2018/19, we averaged just 234.

My hometown team is on the up.

So, that was the easy bit, the Saturday. Sunday would be a different ball game. I collected PD and LP, and we flew into London for a great pre-match in three venues. First up, the much visited and much-loved “Half-Moon Café” on Fulham Palace Road for a tasty and filling breakfast. There was a brief interchange with a Chelsea fan and his two boys.

Me : “I am feeling nervous.”

Him : “Me too. Fifty/fifty.”

Then a quick flit to “Walham Green”, the pub on the site of the old Fulham Broadway station, where we stayed for a couple of hours. Alan Hudson, who is often seen in the pubs of Fulham, came in and we shared a few words. He was looking very dapper. Now seventy-five, he of course sadly missed out on both games against Leeds United in 1970 due to injury. It was his debut season.

We then caught a cab to Paddington and then an Uber to Marylebone. Here we met up with tons of familiar Chelsea faces inside “The Victoria and Albert” bar and on the pavement outside. There were Leeds fans in the “Station Master” bar next-door. It was all very convivial and – dare I say it – friendly. The dark days of old seemed light years away.

I met up with Nina from New Jersey, who I first met at the tail-end of last season in the US, and met Brenda and Kerry from the US for the first time. Courtney had driven up from Frome the previous evening and had done some volunteering at the London Marathon in the morning but had managed to wend his way west to join us at Marylebone. Like me, he was on a two-game weekend.

With time moving on, Courtney, Paul, Parky and I caught the 1.40pm train to Wembley Stadium. Here, carriages were mixed, and there was banter between the two sets of fans. This would be Courtney’s first visit to Wembley.

Outside in the sun, I took a photo of Courtney with the towering arch behind.

A lot had been made of us not selling our full allocation of tickets; a situation that I was uneasy with. This was a game in London. Against Leeds United. Was the “disconnect” between fans and footballers so huge that the tickets did not fly?

My worries about the day continued to flicker in and out of my head.

I had always been concerned that we would not only struggle on the pitch against Leeds – who schooled us at Elland Road on that miserable night in December – but would lose the battle off the pitch too. Their fans would undoubtedly be “up for it” and I was dreading a repeat of the 2008 League Cup Final when we were devastatingly out sung by a baying Tottenham support.

There was also the “Wembley factor.”

I had every right to be concerned about this game since the last time that I had seen us win at Wembley was way back in May 2018 when Eden Hazard’s penalty gave us a 1-0 win in the FA Cup Final. Since then, there had been seven defeats in a row. Sadly, I was not allowed into our semi-final win versus Crystal Palace in 2022 as my Canon SLR was on the prohibited list.

On this day my small Sony “point and shoot” camera made it in with the briefest of security checks, and on another day, I am sure I could have smuggled my SLR in.

PD and LP made their way to their section behind the goal. As luck would have it, Courtney and I were in the same section, just on the corner flag, and both in the first row, and I was very happy with this change of scene and view. From memory, I had only ever been in the lower section along the side of the pitch just once before at the new Wembley.

I was in at 2.15pm.

Disregarding the games against Tottenham when they played home games at the national stadium, this would be my thirty-sixth Chelsea match at either Wembley stadia; nine at the old Wembley and twenty-seven at the new Wembley.

These figures still shock me.

These are huge numbers.

The first thing I noticed is that when both seats of players made their entrances onto the pitch at 2.25pm, the roar for the Leeds players dwarfed the roar for the Chelsea team; a bad omen for what lay ahead.

Lo and behold, on the pitch under the Royal Box, who should be interviewed by the annoying Chelsea PA chap but Alan Hudson. He was questioned about the 1970 final, and the battles between the two teams. Hudson spoke about the Chelsea team as being full of characters. He wasn’t wrong.

Next up was Tony Dorigo, who had played for both teams, and had won the league with Leeds in 1991/92. He mentioned the thrill of scoring at Wembley, and perhaps that was his subtle nod to us; his goal won the ZDS Cup against ‘Boro in 1990.

Our Chelsea team was announced, and Calum chose this starting eleven :

Robert Sanchez

Malo Gusto – Trevoh Chalobah – Tosin Adarabioyo – Marc Cucurella

Moises Caicedo – Romeo Lavia

Pedro Neto – Enzo Fernandez – Alejandro Garnacho

Joao Pedro

Without Cole Palmer and Reece James, this was the best we could hope for, but it seemed a decent enough team to start.

As kick-off approached, the ends erupted in colour.

To my right, banners flew high on the upper balcony.

“WE ARE THE FAMOUS, THE FAMOUS CHELSEA.”

At pitch level, a line from the 1997 FA Cup Final song reminded everyone about 1970.

“WE’VE GOT SOME MEMORIES ALBEIT FROM THE 70’S.”

We were given flags to wave and unlike the generic standard issue ones of before, these mentioned the game and date; a nice touch.

These were waved during “Blue is the Colour”, even by me, I must be getting soft.

At the other end, yellow scarves had been handed out to the hordes from Yorkshire, and they held them high as “Marching on Together” was played on the PA. A line from the song was displayed at pitch level.

It was altogether, at both ends, quite a spectacle.

At 3pm, the game began.

I am not usually a fan of being so low down, but on this occasion, for a change of scene, it was fine. You get a great perspective of Wembley’s height. It was quite breathtaking. In the first few minutes I was mightily impressed with the noise that Chelsea were making, mainly to my right, but it seemed to encompass both the lower and upper tiers, never an easy task. This was very encouraging.

There was a low shot from Pedro Neto that was easily saved by Lucas Perri. Leeds were given a free kick that I caught on film, but which did not bother Sanchez. There was an early knock-down by Joao Pedro that set up Enzo, but his firm shot went wide. Garnacho, testing the Leeds defence but also our patience, was set free but fluffed his shot.

Chelsea had opened the game well, and were on top, and Enzo was directing operations and providing much-needed bite where needed.

But then, after initially swooping in to clear a ball, Chalobah picked the wrong pass and Leeds pounced. We were back-peddling, and the move brought back a host of recent disastrous moments. The ball was worked to Dominic Calvert-Lewin who flicked a defence-splitting pass to Brenden Aaronson. His low shot was on target, but Sanchez did ever so well with his reflexes to divert the ball away with his right foot. I’ll say it again; the bloke is a fine shot-stopper.

Immediately after the shot was blocked, I turned towards the Chelsea fans to my right and caught the reaction on Aaronson’s face on the large TV screen. It seemed to immediately match the face that I was pulling too; one of utter disbelief.

On twenty-one minutes, a fine move involving Enzo and Lavia set up Joao Pedro, who raced in on goal, but the ball flashed wide after smacking the near post.

Being in the front row, there was no real need for me to stand, and I didn’t particularly want to upset those immediately behind me. However, on twenty-three minutes, sensing a great chance, I stood without thinking, as Pedro Neto was played in by Joao Pedro after a long kick out by Sanchez. Neto steadied himself and sent over a cracking cross into the penalty area. Enzo rose and headed down, past Perri, and in.

Get in.

The Chelsea end roared.

On Tuesday at Brighton, Enzo stood in front of the Chelsea support, alone with his thoughts. Now he was celebrating with his teammates in front of the Leeds United supporters. I chanced a photo, full zoom, and it came out OK, with just enough detail to see the glum Yorkshire faces, apart from two lads, who might not have been Leeds fans at all.

We were 1-0 up.

Glorious.

Chelsea continued to dominate, but chances were quite rare. Our support dominated the Wembley arena, and I was stunned with how quiet the Leeds support had been.

On thirty minutes, Chelsea bellowed “YSIFS” – and it undoubtedly was.

Joao Pedro, the definition of a modern number nine, was playing some lovely stuff, and went close again with a lovely piece of close control followed by a volley.

On thirty-five minutes, possibly the best move of the match, but Garnacho’s cross whizzed across the six-yard box but there was nobody on hand to add a touch.

With five minutes of the first half remaining, the folks at the Western end of the stadium eventually found their voices.

“We all love Leeds, we all love Leeds, we all love Leeds, we all love Leeds.”

Then, just after, the first “Marching on Together” since the barrage of noise before the game.

Their quietness had really shocked me. Leeds have always had noisy support, and I wondered if their timid support for most of the first half was due to nervousness.

I remembered their last FA Cup semi-final, way back in 1987, when my college mate Bob joined the Yorkshire team’s support at Hillsborough against Coventry City. Leeds lost 3-2 but my abiding memory from that that day is of the Leppings Lane terrace being absolutely rammed with Leeds supporters. It looked amazing but also terrifying.

On forty-two minutes, Ethan Ampadu – good player, sigh – hoisted a long throw into the box but the resulting Leeds shot flew over the bar.

At the break, we were on top, but I wondered if 1-0 would be enough.

During the half-time break, I noticed that my mate Stephen from New Orleans via Belfast was sitting just a few rows behind me and so I invited him down to watch the second half in the spare seat next to me. I last saw him in the front row at Palace a few months ago.

Chelsea were, of course, now attacking our end, and I hoped for some better-quality photos with the Chelsea players, hopefully, being close by.

In the first minute, after another long Ampadu throw, the ball was knocked around and the ball fell to Anton Stoch who let fly just outside the box. Sanchez did ever so well to parry the shot and his strong wrist deflected the ball high and it dropped, thankfully, on the roof of the net.

Soon after, we drove through the Leeds lines with a lovely break and then with some ingeniously intricate play between Gusto and Enzo. This allowed Joao Pedro a final stab at goal, but he was crowded out and the ball went wide.

I think I pulled that face again.

Not so long after Joao Pedro, so fluid and intelligent, passed to Enzo, then to Garnacho, but his finish was deflected over.

But Leeds were enjoying more of the ball in this half. Just before the hour a cross from their left to an un-marked Calvert Lewin was met with a clean header, but a poor header that Sanchez easily saved.

Then, time for me to roll out my “I hate modern football” catchphrase.

Sanchez went down, the referee blew his whistle, Enzo raced to the manager for instructions, and the Leeds end booed. Inside I was booing too.

This pathetic routine needs to be banished from football.

Leeds were up in arms.

“You cheating bastards, you know what you are.”

We replied with a ditty to the same tune, no names, no pack drill.

On the pitch, Leeds were on top now, but they never really carved out too many chances. It was all about us defending with shape and perseverance.

With sixty-five minutes on the clock, Andrey Santos replaced Lavia.

The game became scrappier. The fans of both teams were experiencing different emotions.

On seventy-one minutes, Cole Palmer replaced Garnacho.

“Great, hopefully some shots of him teasing their full back.”

Well, I took a few, but Palmer never really got in the game, and I was seething when he kicked the ball away, resulting in a very silly yellow.

Chelsea defended resolutely as Leeds kept trying to break through our ranks. The Leeds support went up many notches in that second half; it was quite a turnaround.

Towards the end, though, sensing the players needed the boost, we rallied with some noise of our own.

“AND IT’S SUPER CHELSEA.”

On ninety minutes, the stewards in front stood up, quite unnecessarily really, so we all stood up too.

“Two can play at that game.”

The noise doubled.

“SUPER CHELSEA FC.

WE’RE BY FAR THE GREATEST TEAM.

THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN.”

We were defiantly loud.

Eight minutes of extra time were signalled.

“OLE OLE OLE OLE – CHELSEA CHELSEA.”

In the final minute, Liam Delap replaced Joao Pedro, who, along with Enzo and Sanchez were the game’s finest performers.

At last, the whistle.

Phew.

Lots of Chelsea smiles, lots of happiness. I tried to catch Courtney’s eye, but he was in his own little world.

As the team walked towards us, we focussed on one player,

“OH ENZO FERNANDEZ. OH ENZO FERNANDEZ.”

And he, once again, focussed on us, standing alone, taking it all in, again alone with his thoughts.

On this occasion, the thoughts were much more wholesome and pleasant, no doubt.

I grabbed my flag – though it will undoubtedly end up with others in a spare bedroom – and walked slowly out to meet up with Paul and Parky.

There was a warm glow. I was just happy to be walking back to Wembley Park after a win at Wembley. It had been eight long years for me. We were in no rush to slowly trudge our way up Olympic Way – not Wembley Way, which is elsewhere – and so we sat for a while to let the crowds disperse.

We were all so happy.

After another crazy season, I summed it up.

“Chaos and Cup Finals.”

We would be back at Wembley in three weeks for our seventeenth FA Cup Final.

Our current record, after years of successes, has now slipped to a record of eight wins and eight losses. Should we beat Manchester City, we would go third in the list behind Arsenal with fourteen and Manchester United with thirteen.

In a moment of ridiculous optimism, I sent a few people this message.

“The last week :

Win the Cup Final.

Beat Tottenham.

Relegate Tottenham.

Beat Sunderland.

On the piss in Newcastle as Arsenal finish second.”

I can dream, right?

While we were waiting, I happened to look up and spot a semi-recognisable figure; well-dressed, smart, a familiar gait, and I told the lads “I reckon that’s Eddie Gray.”

He was around fifteen yards away, and I bounced over.

“I know that every time you come to Chelsea, you get in contact with Ron Harris to have a chat and he really appreciates that. So, thank you.”

The photo I took of myself with a true Leeds United legend, a key player in the 1970 matches, and who was still playing for Leeds United when we beat them 5-0 in April 1984, was almost the highlight of the day. What an honour. And what a lovely man.

Just a few minutes later, Stuart Pearce walked past, and I nervously reached out to shake his hand too. He looked in a rush, but we shook hands. Another legend of football.

Alan Hudson, Eddie Gray, Stuart Pearce.

I did well.

We feasted on some sandwiches from a nearby “Tesco” and eventually left Wembley Park at 6.45pm. We were back at Fulham Broadway at 7.30pm, and I shot off to get my car and returned to pick the lads up for the trip home.

On that drive back to Wiltshire and Somerset, we realised that we had not heard – at Wembley at least – those two terrace standards of all previous Chelsea / Leeds encounters.

There had been no Dambusters.

“We all hate Leeds and Leeds and Leeds…”

And no Doris Day.

“And go get your father’s gun…”

It truly shocked us.

I eventually reached home, with pleasant thoughts of the final five matches, and after the past couple of months that has to be a good thing.

Next up, a home game against Nottingham Forest.

See you there.

WEMBLEY

BADGERS HILL

Tales From Twenty-Two Hours

Posted on April 25, 2026 by Chris Axon

Brighton And Hove Albion vs. Chelsea : 21 April 2026.

It never ceases to amaze me that despite our runs of disastrous form which have haunted us over recent years, there is still a clamour to attend Chelsea games, and especially away games. Home games have become a test of grim endurance of late but away fixtures have retained their sense of fun and adventure.

On the day of our evening flit to Sussex for our away match at Brighton & Hove Albion, I was up at just before 5am, and at work at 6am. At 8am, I received a text from my mate Mark, from nearby Westbury, enquiring if I knew of anyone with a spare. Within minutes, I had contacted my pal Jason from Swanage and had sorted things.

There would be one more body in the away end that evening.

Brighton, though. The mere mention of the name sent me back to those utterly grim back-to-back games at the Amex in the February of last year. They were two of the worst Chelsea performances in my memory.

On this occasion, with Chelsea losing our last four league games without scoring a single goal, I predicted our chances of winning to be at 25%.

I left work, with Parky and Paul, and headed down to Salisbury to collect Steve. I stopped for refreshments at Tilshead on Salisbury Plain en route, slowing me slightly, but the journey surprisingly took a whole hour. I continued, a familiar path this one, passing Southampton and Portsmouth, but I was up against some heavy traffic further east on the A27, so came inland at Arundel.

For the next hour we slowly drove through country roads, small towns, country lanes barely wide enough to accommodate two cars, and miniscule villages. There were signs for Hassocks where Matthew Harding lived. There were farms, and fields full of lambs, roads full of slow-moving traffic, overhanging branches, a gorgeous cloudless sky above, and we drove close to Ditchling and its famous Beacon. On two occasions, we found ourselves heading due north rather than south, or even east. We were in the middle of nowhere, a rural idyl, and it seemed ridiculous that we would soon be at a topflight football game.

We eventually closed in on our destination, Lewes, arriving at 6.30pm, some four-and-a-half hours after leaving Melksham. There was the usual battle to sort out parking at the train station car park, but after fighting my phone and an app for a full fifteen minutes, we caught the free train to Falmer.

Then the short walk up to the stadium, which has been enhanced by a new hospitality area called The Terrace which was being built last season.

I like the stadium at Falmer, but I am glad that not every stadium is like it. It makes a decent change. It’s quite aesthetically pleasing both inside and out and has a nice vibe. But I prefer city centre stadia.

I was inside at around 7.30pm, and soon bumped into Mark, who was happy as Larry to get the ticket from Jason.

“Thanks for sorting that, mate.”

“Steady on, you might have a different opinion at full time, mate.”

I was, as always at Brighton, near the front in the third row. Even with an SLR, the goal nets get in the way of decent photos at Brighton. I brought my small camera instead and doubted that I would be able to get any decent action photos. Instead, I turned the camera towards fellow fans. I would be watching the game alongside John and Paul, from Brighton, who was able to utilise Alan’s ticket.

I spotted some scaffolding at the opposite end and wondered if some sort of stadium enhancement was in progress, albeit cosmetic.

Liam Rosenior chose this team and bizarrely chose a new formation.

Robert Sanchez

Wesley Fofana – Trevoh Chalobah – Jorrel Hato

Malo Gusto – Moises Caicedo – Romeo Lavia – Marc Cucurella

Pedro Neto – Liam Delap – Enzo Fernandez

This change in formation did not fill me with too much confidence I hasten to add.

The ground filled, but there were gaps in the home areas. Sadly, just a few empties around me too. Fireworks filled the air to my right, and there was a hearty rendition of their club anthem.

“You may tell them all that we stand or fall.
For Sussex by the Sea”

Then, the entrance of the teams.

Again, I wondered about the cleverness of wearing all black at an evening game, especially when probably 75% of the spectators were wearing black, dark grey or dark blue coats and jackets. Why not get us a nice all-yellow ensemble for midweek games?

Above, high up in the sky, a thin sliver of a crescent moon shone down on us all, the sky still pure blue and beautiful.

At 8pm, the game kicked off, the only Premier League fixture on this day.

The home team attacked us from the off, and Chalobah made two strong defensive headers in the first few minutes as they came at us from all angles. Already Kaoru Mituma and Georginio seemed to be the main nuisances. On three minutes, the former found himself completely unmarked at the far post and bounced an effort at goal that Sanchez did well to fingertip over the bar.

From the resulting corner, the ball came in towards the near post and rather than taking Chalobah’s lead, Hato avoided good contact and only flicked the ball on. The ball dropped for Ferdi Kadioglu to smash it goalwards. His low effort took a deflection off Wesley Fofana, and flew into the net, just to my left.

Brighton must hate us, the way we have robbed key personnel over the last few seasons, but they often get their retaliation done on the pitch. This soon looked like being another one of those occasions.

The home team continued their dominance, and the Chelsea faithful watched, dumbfounded at our inability to match them.

There was another super tip over by Sanchez from a header by Jan Paul Van Heck.

The away fans bellowed “we want our Chelsea back.”

On fourteen minutes, a thirty second segment summed up our current health. Neto advanced well on the right and cut in but slipped at the all-important moment. Brighton gathered the ball quickly and raced away with desire and direction. There was a moment when Lavia had enough of the ball after a tackle to clear, but he hesitated, allowing Rutter to strike at goal. Luckily his effort was off target.

Four minutes later, Sanchez blotted his copybook as he attempted a tight pass out to a teammate despite the close presence of attackers. His pass was intercepted by Yankuba Minteh who squared to Jack Hinshelwood. Thankfully, his shot was swept off the line by Our Trev.

Fackinell.

I leaned towards John and Paul and said “it’s bad when only 20 minutes have gone and you want the referee to blow up for half-time.

The Chelsea choir were quiet, in a state of shock, but there were a few resilient shouts.

“COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA.”

On twenty minutes, Calvin came over to talk and commented that we had just one touch in the opposition’s box. I think it may well have been Neto’s slip.

One touch, bloody hell.

The rest of the half gave us nothing to celebrate. Our play was sluggish, especially when compared to the home team.

On forty minutes, I glanced at the BBC website and saw that we were still on one touch in the opposition box.

On forty-one minutes, hallelujah, a header from a Chelsea corner.

Two touches.

As we kept the ball for the longest period of the entire first-half, the home fans chortled.

“We want our ball back.”

The cheeky so-and-sos.

At half-time, I kept saying to everyone “how is it only still 1-0?”

In the end, we ended up with four touches in the Brighton penalty box. It had been an utterly woeful performance with only Sanchez – bar his one crazy pass – and Chalobah pleasing me.

We wondered what on earth Rosenior would be saying to the players inside the dressing room. I suspected that he was so livid that he would be using five different colours of highlighter to illustrate his plans for the second period.

He decided to replace Fofana with Alejandro Garnacho, and we reverted to a more familiar shape, at least on paper.

Believe it or not, we improved in the first moments of the second period. Garnacho was sent through and zipped a shot at goal.

The Chelsea crowd gasped.

“We’ve had a shot.

We’ve had a shot.

We’ve had a shot. We’ve had a shot. We’ve had a shot.”

Gulp.

We had a little more of the ball, but it struck me that when we broke we seemed like rabbits staring at headlights, unsure of what to do. Brighton, in comparison, had a natural flow to their play.

Five minutes in, the old “Second Half At An Away Game” chant kicked-in, to the tune of “Amazing Grace.”

“Chelsea.

Chelsea.

Chelsea. Chelsea.

Chelsea. Chelsea. Chelsea.

Chelsea. Chelsea. Chelsea. Chelsea.

Chelsea. Chelsea. Chelsea.”

Brighton had a penalty shout at the far end, the ball hitting Cucurella.

On fifty-three minutes, we similarly had a penalty shout when the ball flipped up onto Yankuba Minteh’s sleeve, but no decision. With that, they broke like an express train and Rutter set up Hinshelwood to steer home.

Ugh.

Things turned nasty in the away end.

“Fuck off Rosenior.”

The focus had changed from the idiot board to the manager.

On sixty-two minutes, Mitoma did a few “keep-uppies” before a shot that dipped just over. I found myself involuntary clapping, just happy to see some bona fide skill in these days of robotic football.

There was a decent break from Brighton in the inside-left channel, but another lovely save from Sanchez. And then another save from Sanchez. Both were from Kadioglu. He was producing a man of the match performance.

On seventy-two minutes, there were two changes.

Marc Guiu for Delap.

Dario Essugo for Lavia.

While all of this was going on at an increasingly chilly Amex Stadium, Frome Town were playing Portishead Town in the final of the Somerset Premier Cup, which was being played at Bath City’s Twerton Park, the former home of Bristol Rovers from 1986 to 1996.

We went 1-0 down, then levelled with a Zak Drew penalty. Portishead went 2-1 up in the second half, only for Sam Meakes to equalise. Then, as Chelsea entered the final quarter of an hour in Falmer, Callum Gould scored a 3-2 winner.

It would be Frome Town’s first double in one-hundred and twenty-two seasons.

On seventy-six minutes, Gusto passed to Garnacho but his shot was deflected wide.

Paul received a text from Alan who said that he was watching the test card as it was more exciting.

I replied that he had more chance of seeing the girl put an “X” on the noughts and crosses board than us getting a goal.

A Guiu shot was deflected for a corner.

I still kept thinking “how is it only 2-0?”

We grimaced when Danny Welbeck was introduced by the Brighton manager Fabian Hürzeler.

Thousands of Chelsea brains clicked as one : “he always scores against us.”

The away end was sparsely populated now, and perhaps some just couldn’t take the ultimate humiliation of this chant from the home areas :

“Are you Tottenham in disguise?”

Lo and behold, on ninety-one minutes a pass inside from Brighton wide man Maxim De Cuyper, and a Brighton player, looking suspiciously like Welbeck, slashed the ball high into the net.

“It’s Welbeck, innit? It’s bloody Welbeck. Bloody hell.”

He reeled away in celebration.

Fackinell.

Josh Acheampong replaced Gusto and you wondered why.

At the final whistle, cheers from Brighton and jeers from Chelsea.

The away end, as at Everton, was probably only one-fifth full by now. I stayed because I was intrigued to see the reaction of the players, and maybe the supporters to the players.

Well, first and foremost, as far as I could tell, none shot off down the tunnel and I took some photos of the scene taking place a few yards away. Jorrel Hato, Alejandro Garnacho and Marc Cucurella first appeared, their faces showing nothing but sadness. Others walked over. There was no patronising clapping from any. They stood meekly still and in front of us. I saw Liam Rosenior slowly walk over. Again, no clapping, but he put his hand on his heart and gestured. There was a volley of boos. This was painful to watch.

The players didn’t hide. They let us vent. And I can’t deny that I felt sadness with them.

My gaze became focused on Marc Cucurella and Enzo Fernandez, who stayed the longest, and then on Enzo who stood silent and still for a minute or so after the rest had turned to walk away.

He still didn’t clap, and I was OK with that. I appreciated that he stood and took it all. He did not hide. There was no emotion. What emotion could there be? He played it straight. He played it as he should. He became the focus for the supporters’ anger. He played it exactly right in my book.

I can only hope that those moments stay with him, as captain, and with the others and that it can inspire them to try to win back our affection.

We all met up outside in the concourse and shuffled away to Falmer Station. Darren from Crewe chatted about the depressing state of affairs, and how he was dreading the Wembley game against Leeds United on Sunday, a game that still has Chelsea tickets for sale.

“I’m not even reading your blog for the rest of the season. I’ve had enough.”

We were back at Lewes station at 10.45pm, and I then faced the tortuous journey home.

As I drove through the town’s tight streets, Parky wondered what Rosenior had said during the post-match interview.

“We were not good enough. Brighton were very good. And can I buy Danny Welbeck please?”

I replied.

“Danny de Vito would be a fucking improvement at the moment.”

It was a long trip home with a few painful diversions. I dropped Steve off in Salisbury at 1am.

As I headed north over Salisbury Plain, the moon was now just above the horizon, and straight ahead of where I was driving. It seemed like it was haunting me. That thin sliver of silver that appeared so high in the sky as the game began had now dropped to eye level and had grown in size and had turned a deep yellow.

A metaphor for how our club has dropped in status and league position?

Who knows?

I dropped the lads off and I reached home at 2.30am.

I fell asleep, dreaming of fading moons and fading fortunes, at 3am.

I had been awake for twenty-two hours.

You can write your own punchline.

Tales From The Men In Black

Posted on March 9, 2026 by Chris Axon

Aston Villa vs. Chelsea : 4 March 2026.

Chelsea were amid a run of away games against Arsenal, Aston Villa, Wrexham and Paris St. Germain; this midweek fixture at Villa Park was being talked about within many Chelsea circles as a “must win” game, bearing in mind Villa’s place in the league – just ahead of us – but also because they were on a run of poor form.

This had been a simple enough flit up the M5 for me – via a curry at “The Vine” in West Bromwich – and I was parked-up on Bragg Road around fifteen minutes from the away turnstiles at 6.30pm. I fastened my coat and walked east. Kick-off was an hour away.

It was the usual scene at Villa Park; the police vans parked on the roundabout where Witton Road meets Aston Lane, the approach along Witton Lane, the bloke with the “God Is Love” placard, the red bricked buildings, the souvenir sellers, the floodlights in the distance. I did notice a new pre-match hospitality area as I got closer, a good use of those old existing buildings. Villa have plans to enlarge the existing North Stand, and they have plenty of space to enlarge the hospitality areas further.

I was sat in the second row alongside John; alas Alan and Gary could not make this one. Parky and PD were down in the lower tier.

The famous old stadium slowly filled, and we were soon treated to the usual pre-match rituals at Villa of “Hi-Ho Aston Villa”, flames, and fireworks, and dear old Ozzy belting out “Crazy Train.” Other clubs – yes, including ours – have gone for the “Flames & Fireworks” as a pre-curser to the match, but Villa have taken it to a different level. If you were to rate their pre-match claret and sky-blue pyrotechnic trickery, it would certainly be top of the pile. In fact, Villa are so desperate for silverware these days that we might soon find this in their honours section of their match programme.

Amid the sulphurous fumes, the teams made their way onto the pitch.

Liam Rosenior had chosen this team :

Filip Jorgensen

Malo Gusto – Wesley Fofana – Trevoh Chalobah – Jorrel Hato

Reece James – Moises Caicedo

Cole Palmer – Enzo Fernandez – Alejandro Garnacho

Joao Pedro

Was Robert Sanchez injured or dropped?

We were dressed in our all-black kit, and I had immediate memories of us in that colour at this venue in other years, most memorably the Frank Lampard game in 2013 when he equalled and then surpassed Bobby Tambling’s 202 goals. I also, and oddly, remembered the black-shirted Alexandre Pato’s penalty kick in a 4-0 win in 2016.

The game began with us attacking the towering Holte End. I spent the first few moments trying to work out who was where on the right side of the field. Was Reece at right back, but able to push into midfield with Malo Gusto as a right-sided attacker – unlikely, I know – or was Gusto at right back, with Reece alongside Caicedo in midfield? The positioning of Enzo and Palmer seemed to confuse me more than help me. I think it was the initial position of Gusto, so high on that far side, that had baffled me. Within those first fleeting moments, we had won a corner but then got caught on a rapid break from the home team. I took a couple of photos of Leon Bailey teasing away down below us. He got the better of Hato and drove a low ball into the box, where Douglas Luiz delicately and deftly touched it past Jorgensen.

Only three minutes had passed, and we were already 0-1 down.

Fackinell.

I was shell-shocked.

The home support was enlivened.

“Holte Enders in the skoy.”

Two minutes later, Garnacho on the left curled a great cross over for Joao Pedro to head down but Emilano Martinez saved well.

Soon after, at a Chelsea corner, we noticed how the Villa team left four players up, and of course it meant we had less numbers in attack. It was a new and novel approach to defending corners, though I seem to remember Jose Mourinho leaving three up in his first stint with us.

Palmer shot weakly at Martinez on a quarter of an hour, and up until now our support was getting increasingly frustrated with the slow approach play from the back. Chalobah must have touched the ball more than anyone else in this period.

“Get it forward!”

I heard that Arsenal were 1-0 up at Brighton and I told John “I hate football.”

On twenty-one minutes, another chance for Palmer inside the box after a great ball into him, but his finish was as weak as before. Then, two minutes later, and with Chelsea picking up the pace and finding some good angles and spaces, a lovely move set up Enzo, but his effort was hit tamely at Martinez. By now, Garnacho was getting more and more involved out wide and giving Matty Cash a real test.

The game was hotting up. We had, also, quietened their crowd, always a good sign.

Out on the far side of the pitch was Ian Maatsen, our former player, and I could not help noticing how short he seemed in comparison to the other players. I had only been commenting to Alan, I think, at a recent home game how we never see short players at football these days. It’s a mark of the modern game; how most players need to be tall and physically strong, and especially fast, in this era. Gone are the days when will o’ the wisp players…cheeky wingers, midfield dynamos…were everywhere…our own Pat Nevin, our own Mickey Thomas, our own Gianfranco Zola spring to mind. All these players – and Maatsen – were 5’6” and it’s an oddity that there seems to be a shortage – sorry! – of these players today.

Maybe I noticed Maatsen because I am 5’6” too.

We continued to be press forward.

Just after the half-hour I turned to John to say “it’s a much better game now.”

We had thrown off our shackles and were now having a real go at Villa. There was a shot from the energetic Garnacho, and the Chelsea choir were now getting behind the men in black. But Villa were still an occasional threat and Ollie Watlkins perhaps should have tested Jorgensen better when one-on-one.

On thirty-five minutes, a wonderful ball from Enzo was sent over the Villa defence to the onrushing Gusto. He spotted the run of Joao Pedro and I sensed a goal. I mouthed “here we go” at the exact moment that he arrived to slide the ball home.

GET IN YOU BEAUTY.

More Chelsea pressure, Garnacho revelling in the space out wide.

“Go on son, get past him.”

Cash was being run from arsehole to breakfast time.

In the third minute of added time, Hato – who was enjoying a very solid game – dribbled into the Villa box with ease but his shot was blocked.

Then, a rapid Villa break, and I kept an eye on the passage of play, trying to spot if an offside was about to happen. The ball was passed out to Ollie Watkins who struck the ball past Jorgensen. The Villa hordes roared again,

To me, it looked onside. Thankfully, VAR ruled otherwise. Phew.

Then, with five minutes of added time played, Chelsea were again knocking on the door, and Garnacho was involved once more. He found Enzo who wriggled into some space and lifted an exquisite ball into Joao Pedro. He nonchalantly guided the ball past Martinez.

Now it was our turn to roar again.

Then, to our horror, VAR was called in to rule on a potential offside.

Nah. The goal stood.

At the break, we were 2-1 to the good.

“Great recovery that, John.”

I just hoped that we could continue in the same fashion. Sometimes we just can’t seem to play two consecutive halves in the same way, can we?

Joe Cole, with former Chelsea fan Peter Crouch on TV duty, were spotted a few times and Joey walked over to pose for some photos with a few Chelsea supporters in the break.

Before the second period, more “Crazy Train” and another Chelsea huddle on the centre-circle that seemed to irritate the Villa players.

The second half began, and there were two early chances for Garnacho but he spurned them both.

On fifty-five minutes, we broke when Caicedo won a ball inside our half and we moved the ball quickly – no honest, we did, I was there – via Palmer and Joao Pedro and found Reece on the wing. His low cross was punched away by Martinez, but only as far as Palmer. The Palmer of old – er, two seasons ago – would have struck it home easily, whereas the little less confident Palmer of 2026 might struggle. I watched to see which version would prevail.

He struck the ball with venom. Its trajectory was unhindered. The back of the net rippled.

GET IN.

I watched Palmer cup his ear as if to say “what’s that you been saying about me?” and then saw his trademark celebration.

Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap.

“Palmer again, ole, ole.”

We were 3-1 up.

Beautiful.

We continued to purr, and the Chelsea fans were energised and happy. This was just how I wanted us to play. With more freedom. With more pace. With more style.

Chelsea is all about style.

But this was still an open game – Mourinho would have hated it – and chances for Palmer and Garnacho were matched occasionally by Villa. Watkins was put through, one on one with Jorgensen but he dallied, enabling Chalobah to twist his body and dig out the ball, a fine piece of defending.

On sixty-three minutes, former blues Jadon Sancho and Ross Barkley were among the three substitutions made by Villa.

A minute later, Caicedo – from deep – swept the ball out to Gusto, who touched it to Palmer. His trusted left peg floated the ball out to Garnacho. I photographed his surging run, deep into the box, and watched as he very unselfishly played the ball square to Joao Pedro who guided the ball in, his hat-trick.

The goal immediately reminded me of that Lampard goal from 2013.

The scorer raced over to the Chelsea section, and I was lucky enough to capture his beatific smiles.

4-1.

Fackinell.

Not long after, there was an audacious bicycle kick from Joao Pedro.

On seventy-two minutes, Tammy Abraham came on and so Villa now had four ex-Chelsea players in their eleven.

In the last fifteen minutes, Rosenior rang the changes.

75 minutes : Romeo Lavia for Gusto.

79 minutes : Marc Cucurella for Enzo.

79 minutes : Tosin Adarabioyo for Fofana,

85 minutes : Liam Delap for Joao Pedro.

85 minutes : Andrey Santos for Palmer.

John and I had a little laugh about Lavia and his unfortunate habit of getting injured. I envisaged a scenario where he is chosen to start a game and lasts the entire match. He comes into the Chelsea dressing room at the end of the game and sits on the bench alongside his teammates.

Liam Rosenior sees him and asks “what the fuck are you doing here?”

With the game won, and the number of changes, it was no surprise that the game drifted towards the end. It was nice to see the former Chelsea players again, and Barkley had a trademark shuffle through the middle and shot.

“I can actually see them scoring” I said to Gary, just as Barkley floated a ball in and Abraham leapt to head the ball on to the top of the bar.

In the stadium, the home fans were drifting away, and the Chelsea crowd aired the “fire drill” chant.

The game finished and the men in black had triumphed. This was a lovely surprise, a great Chelsea performance – admittedly against an increasingly disheartened Villa team – and a perfect response to the doom mongers after Arsenal. The plaudits must got to Joao Pedro and his sublime touch, and his ability to drift in and score, but Garnacho was a revelation, his best game for us by a country mile. A special mention for Hato, too; what a polished performance.

I was able to take a selection of photographs at the end as the Chelsea players celebrated down below. I loved the way Enzo was serenaded. He has many admirers at Chelsea. And I loved how we sang Tammy’s name as he walked, slightly, towards us. The photo of him with Trevoh is my favourite of the whole night.

And so that was that. A great away win in a “must-win” game, and a nice fillip before trips to Wales and France.

Oh, there were three extra bits of drama that I won’t bore you with that took place during the afternoon and evening involving Parky’s ‘phone, my SLR camera and my wallet.

“I still can’t download the ticket. I reckon I’m knackered.”

“You can’t bring that camera in. There’s a “drop-off” place just over there.”

“The team are doing a sweep of the stadium; it’s going to be an hour mate. Will you wait here to see if we can find it?”

Thankfully, everything worked out.

Next up, a first-ever trip for me to Wrexham.

Stay tuned.

Tales From Much Ado About Nothing

Posted on February 6, 2026 by Chris Axon

Arsenal vs. Chelsea : 3 February 2026.

I was at the end of my own little personal stretch of eight consecutive games in London: four at HQ, one at Charlton, one at Fulham, one at Palace and now this one at Arsenal. During the day, I was asked about my thoughts of the outcome of the League Cup semi-final second leg at the Emirates. I wasn’t sure about guessing a score, but my prediction was that we had a 25% chance of progressing to the final at Wembley. After the first-leg loss, Arsenal would be a tough nut to crack.

Unfortunately, Parky had failed a late fitness test, so just PD accompanied me on this occasion.

We had been given almost six thousand tickets for this game, and I was delighted that Arsenal had not charged us an exorbitant price for tickets. Unlike the £60 for my ticket at Stamford Bridge, I paid just a little over £30 for this one at Arsenal.

The drive east in the afternoon was not easy. I drove through rain and spray on the M4. I had felt tired, at times, during my shift at work, and after getting up at the loony time of 4.30am, I was obviously dreading more tiredness both to and from London, but hopefully not at the game. Only time would tell on that one.

For years and years, we have parked for free on the road adjacent to Barons Court tube station – Margravine Gardens – for aways against Arsenal, Tottenham and West Ham, conveniently just off the A4, but I happened to notice new parking regulations were in place. Free parking used to be available in after 5pm on weekdays, but now it was after 10pm every day. This was a big kick in the teeth.

Here was the first “fackinell” of the day.

What did this mean?

It meant that I had to divert south to where I park for midweek home games, and we then had to walk over half-a-mile to West Brompton tube station. This wouldn’t normally be an issue, but Paul struggles with such distances. And this is yet another example of how the pleasure that comes from a day at the football is slowly being eroded.

However, we made the best of it and stopped off at my favourite restaurant on the North End Road for a couple of pizzas and then continued a rather wet walk to West Brompton. There was a change onto the Piccadilly Line at Earl’s Court, and then the thirty-five minute journey, through thirteen stations, to Arsenal.

I heard occasional shouts of “Carefree” further down the carriages, but the train obviously contained a few Arsenal supporters too. A family of five were positioned to my left and caught my eye. They stood and sat close to PD, and they each wore a different Arsenal replica shirt. I caught PD’s eye and shook my head. You just don’t see that at Chelsea; a whole bloody family kitted out in club shirts. The father even wore his home shirt over a normal sweatshirt – a real sartorial own-goal in my book – and topped it off with a bobble hat. He couldn’t have looked more gormless if he had tried. And talking of replica kits, the three sons were certainly replica kids – absolute spitting images of their parents – but it worried me that their mother and father looked alike too.

Let’s leave that there, eh?

Up through the tight tunnels at Arsenal, and out into a miserable wet North London night. Rather than turn left as we did when we used to visit Highbury, we know turned right and headed up the long stretch of Drayton Park, past an impressive amount of souvenir stands. PD was still struggling with walking. Eventually we turned right towards the stadium, opposite the Drayton Park Arms – still an away pub I believe – just in time for a few young Arsenal and Chelsea to lads take a pop at one another.

The neon colours of the stadium were reflected in the puddles outside and helped create a photogenic, if watery, feel to a smattering of photos that were taken.

We were in quickly, out of the rain, at 7.20pm and took our seats not long after. PD was seated right next to the three seats of “no man’s land” between us and the Arsenal support, while I, thankfully, was further away, and in row eighteen, well under the roof. Those sitting in the first few rows were in for a soaking.

There were many familiar faces dotted around this lower tier. The split was three thousand in the lower, and a further three thousand high up in the top tier to my left. It annoyed me that away season ticket holders were denied choosing the upper tier. I would have loved to have watched the game up there for the first time, as – I am sure – would many.

Nice work Chelsea, you fools.

The players were on the pitch going through their pre-match drills. They were wearing a homage to the worst Chelsea kit of all time, the hideous tangerine and graphite monstrosity from the mid-‘nineties, complete with the most hated badge of all time, that nasty Millwall lookalike.

Nice work Chelsea, you fools.

The place filled up, and – what a surprise – yet another club has chosen “London Calling” as an intro before the teams stepped foot on the pitch.

We then had to endure the historic “Good old Arsenal” ditty which I always forget about until I hear it at their stadium. It certainly doesn’t have the lasting resonance of the theme from “Z Cars” at Everon nor “Marching on Together” at Leeds, to name but two.

Next, a light show…oh please stop this…let’s get to the football.

The teams eventually appeared.

I was surprised how many Chelsea clapped Noni Madueke when the team line-ups were named. Nobody clapped Kepa Arrizabalaga.

Us?

It took a while for me to work it all out. In fact, I needed to see the players on the pitch before I had a chance.

In goal?

Easy, Robert Sanchez.

It then got a little difficult.

It looked like three central defenders.

Wesley Fofana on the right, in front of us, then Trevoh Chalobah in the middle, then Jorrel Hato on the left.

We then had Malo Gusto and Marc Cucurella out wide.

OK, that was the easy part. Kinda.

Andrey Santos and Moises Caicedo were playing, holding things together.

It looked like Enzo Fernandez was playing a little higher up the pitch.

But we then had Joao Pedro in attack alongside Liam Delap, but with Delap drifting over to the right wing at every opportunity.

Blimey. A rather unorthodox system, eh?

We dominated the early possession, much to my pleasure, and in the sixth minute, Delap came in from the right but scuffed a snapshot well wide of Kepa’s right-hand post. That the striker then kept to the right flank for the rest of the half certainly caused a stir among the Chelsea faithful.

Arsenal forced a series of corners, and we watched as three of our attackers raced out of the box at the last minute, dragging some Arsenal players with them.

This lad Liam Rosenior certainly has some “left-field” – or maybe “right-field” – ideas that he is not afraid to use.

For a while, there was a commotion above and behind me as some Chelsea lads tried to pin a beautiful blue flag – featuring the 1984 two-tone colours – on the top balcony wall. That kit is synonymous with us at Highbury, and I loved that the flag was being given an airing at Arsenal’s new pad. By now, that top section was crammed full of our supporters, and I noticed that every single seat was being used in my section, a fine showing.

Robert Sanchez palmed away an effort from Piero Hincapie, whoever he is, and Gabriel Martinelli made a mess of the rebound.

The home fans weren’t particularly loud once they had settled down after their warbling to the “North London Forever” dirge before kick-off.

North London forever, you say? Not until 1913, you mean. It took until then for the Woolwich Wanderers to settle.

On twenty-six minutes, Moises Caicedo shot wide, well wide.

Wesley Fofana enjoyed an absolutely top-notch purple patch over ten glorious minutes, heading away, recovering well, tackling, playing it out with calmness personified. Excellent work.

The Chelsea choir asked, “is this a library?” and I wondered if the home support were saving themselves for another corner before they might get excited.

On thirty-three minutes, we were all concerned when Gusto let Martinelli get past him, but he recovered so well and saved the day with a bloody superb tackle.

Chances dried up at either end. Although Chelsea seemed to edge possession, there was a paucity of efforts on goal.

At various times in that first-half, that promised so much but delivered so little, Delap managed to fall over the ball, fall over his legs, fall over his marker’s legs, and sometimes run in the opposite direction to the ball. His continued presence in that position confused me, but I – at least – gave some sort of credit to Rosenior in his attempts to confuse the opposition too.

In the forty-third minute, at last a shot. An effort from Enzo was dramatically punched away by Kepa.

It was 0-0 at the break, and I have to say that the mood within the packed away support was positive. I think that many of us solemnly expected that we might get torn apart, so I think that the fact that were still very much in the tie helped us battle our overall feelings of dread.

The rain still fell as the second half began with Chelsea attacking the two zones of Chelsea support in the Clock End.

In the very first minute, Enzo came over to take a corner right in front of us. The ball dropped in to the near post area and the ball was stabbed at goal, took a deflection, but still went wide.

The game became a little scrappy, with niggling tackles all over the pitch, but the Chelsea support remained loud, giving the team some excellent support. When it got going in both sections it reminded me of our support at an FA Cup tie at Villa a few years ago – Enzo’s finest game in a Chelsea shirt – and at Arsenal on this wet old night the usual Chelsea songs were defiantly sung with passion and, er, gusto.

Joao Pedro was putting in a very strong performance all game, showing some neat touches of skill, and a surprising amount of strength when needed. He is impressing me of late.

Again, we were still in this tie.

A little secret; on the drive up to London, wary of a potentially long night ahead, PD had asked what we would do if we were losing 0-3 at half-time. Would we leave? My response was that we would hang on to the hour mark.

On sixty-one minutes, we saw Estevao and Cole Palmer appear on the far side, and they replaced Delap and Hato. A bloke in front of me, who had just returned from the loos, asked his mates who had come off.

I leaned forward and replied “Delap came off twice.”

So, was this Rosenior’s game plan? Get Arsenal used to a cumbersome lump on the wing for an hour, then replace him with a spritely wing wizard, and change the shape too, plus the bonus of Cole Palmer?

If this came off, I was ready to doff my non-existent cap.

We increased our possession with the two additions, and in one move we had the agreeable sight of both Palmer and Estevao attacking down the left within yards of each other. A shot from outside the box from Cucurella curled just wide.

If only we could hit the bloody target.

On sixty-four minutes, the best move of the match, but Enzo shot wildly over. This followed nice wing play from Estevao following a perfect pass from Palmer.

Joao Pedro fell after a challenge from Gabriel but it looked like a dive to me.

“Fucking embarrassing”.

The bloke in front agreed.

Arsenal made some quality substitutions of their own; on came Leandro Trossard and Kai Havertz, who was booed by a sizeable proportion of our support.

I whispered “fasten yer seatbelts” to the bloke to my left.

The mercurial Alejandro Garnacho appeared after seventy-five minutes, replacing Santos. He took his position on the left with Estevao flipping over to the right. This was a case of “do or die” now, but Chelsea found it difficult to squeeze the ball through the packed home defence. Too often the ball was played into the middle, expecting too much from Joao Pedro, and our wingers were not utilised as much as I, for one, wanted.

On eighty-one minutes, another Enzo corner and a Fofana flick, just wide.

Then, just after, an Arsenal break but a beautifully timed sliding tackle by Chalobah as Martinelli looked to exploit some space on the right.

I pleaded with Garnacho to run at his defender and make something happen, but I don’t think he ever did. And virtually every time that he chose to cut back and cross, the ball was blocked.

After eighty-seven minutes, Josh Acheampong replaced Gusto.

The game continued, but the Chelsea players still tended to slowly move the ball from player to player with the fans being the only ones showing the right amount of passion. I wondered if it had sunk in that a place at bloody Wembley was at stake here.

On eighty-nine minutes, Enzo shot over again.

Fackinell.

There was frustration everywhere in our ranks, but I was pleased and proud to note that hardly any of us were disappearing early. We would see this out.

Six minutes of injury time was signalled.

“COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA – COME ON CHELSEA.”

We continued on.

Alas, Arsenal broke on ninety-six minutes, and they had spare men.

I spotted who was free on the right.

“Oh no, Havertz.”

We all watched in agony as he touched the ball past Sanchez and neatly slotted the ball home.

It was, awfully, not unlike a goal he scored one night in Porto.

Bollocks.

The referee blew up, and that was that.

Our travels had taken us to Lincoln, to Wolverhampton, to Cardiff and London, but there was no silverware in the League Cup this season.

With a deep sense of resignation that we never really gave it a go until very late on, we turned and began the slow shuffle towards the exits. I did that thing where I faced away from the pitch, but semi-turned to clap the players as they walked over to our support.

It was a very slow, and wet, walk back to Highbury & Islington tube station. For about fifteen minutes, we did not move an inch as we waited on the Holloway Road.

The Arsenal fans were jubilant and one bloody song kept repeating.

“60 million down the drain, Kai Havertz scores again”

I always remember reading a fan’s reminiscences about walking down the Seven Sisters Road after two consecutive semi-final defeats to Arsenal in the FA Cup in the ‘fifties – it was probably Scott Cheshire, that great Chelsea historian – and how depressed he felt. These were in the days when Chelsea, almost fifty years old, had not won a single thing, and so just imagine how those defeats must have hurt.

This hurt, but it was absolutely nowhere near the same scale of sadness.

At least it meant we could enjoy a first-ever visit to Everton’s new stadium on a Saturday rather than a Tuesday night.

We reached King’s Cross at 11pm, and we eventually got back to West Brompton. I shot off to pick up the car, and collected PD outside the station bang on midnight.

I eventually reached home at 2.20am.

I am never one for hitting the sack straight away; I need to scan my photos to see what I had taken, plus there is the inevitable late-night chit-chat with pals in the U.S.

I fell asleep, eventually, at 3.30am.

4.30am to 3.30am.

Bloody hell, Chelsea.

Tales From A Perfect Day

Posted on February 2, 2026 by Chris Axon

Chelsea vs. West Ham United : 31 January 2026.

Prior to our London derby – the District Line Derby of old – at home to West Ham United, our results had experienced a noticeable upturn, and there was an air of positivity as I collected my three mates – PD, Glenn and Parky – and then set off nice an early for yet another trip to HQ.

I had been unable to watch our magnificent away win in Naples on the Wednesday, but it was the sort of result that brings such a depth of joy that is difficult to beat.

The four of us had a big day ahead. PD was celebrating his sixty-fourth birthday, and so for the second time in three weeks we were staying over in deepest Fulham after the game. I was parked up at just after 10am in the car park of the Premier Inn at Putney Bridge, and we dropped into “The Eight Bells” where Salisbury Steve and Jimmy the Greek were waiting for us. The place, not surprisingly, was virtually empty. It was, after all, around seven and a half hours until the game began.

From there, we headed west to six more pubs along the River Thames, gathering friends along the way, and all of us enjoyed this fantastic pre-match ramble. I sorted out an Uber to take us to the first of the pubs, “Old City Arms” next to Hammersmith Bridge. Ian and his son Bobby – aka “Small Bob”, aka “Bobby Small” – were already there. It was just after 11.15am. From here, we took in five more pubs, all favourites, all located next to the Thames. In “The Blue Anchor” we were joined by our good friends Hans and Jon from Norway, and the famous brothers Dave and Glenn, plus their mate Eddy. We hopped next door to “The Rutland” and Jon’s son Sven joined us. At “The Dove” we squeezed together out on the terrace that overlooked the river and met up with Rob and his wife Alex. Here, Dave from Northampton joined up with us too. Next was “The Old Ship” and then the last port of call, “The Black Lion” which we reached at about 3.45pm.

The weather was unbelievable. Not a hint of rain. A fantastic afternoon in and out of the sun, and in and out of these magnificent pubs. It’s interesting, looking back, when I realise that we never really spoke about the game at all.

We ordered two Ubers to get ourselves down to Fulham Broadway. It had been a perfect pre-match. One for the ages.

As soon as Glenn and I set foot on the Fulham Road, we were really chuffed to bump into an old friend – Olly, now eighty-one – who we used to chat to in The Harwood Arms thirty years ago. He was wearing his trademark blue-and-white Chelsea bar scarf and was equally happy to remember us. We had not seen him for a few years. I always remember that we sat with him in “The Seven Stars” on the North End Road after we won the FA Cup in 1997, and after the Cup had been paraded at Fulham Broadway on the Sunday. A lovely time.

We wolfed down a hot dog apiece and made our way into Stamford Bridge. Waiting for us in The Sleepy Hollow was Alan.

The boys were back together again; four of us in a row.

Chris, Alan, Glenn, PD.

Throughout the afternoon, a couple of friends had been updating me with news of Frome Town’s home game with Willand Rovers. While we were setting up to leave the last pub, a text game through to say that Albie Hopkins, a local Frome lad, had scored. And as I made my way into Stamford Bridge, I heard that this is how the match had ended.

Frome Town’s overall record in the league this season is an admirable 23-4-2. In the last ten games, the team has dropped just two points. My hometown club remained eleven points clear at the top.

Frome Town 73.

Malvern Town 62.

Portishead Town 60.

Winchester City 58.

Shaftesbury 54.

We are also top of the home attendance figures too.

Frome Town 499.

Melksham Town 392.

Malvern Town 343.

Portishead Town 336.

Winchester City 323.

The kick-off at Stamford Bridge was not far away, and I checked Liam Rosenior’s choices.

Robert Sanchez

Malo Gusto – Trevoh Chalobah – Benoit Badiashile – Jorrel Hato

Moises Caicedo – Enzo Fernandez

Jamie Gittens – Cole Palmer – Alejandro Garnacho

Liam Delap

The match began and we attacked The Shed and began well enough.

“COME ON CHELS.”

However, after just seven minutes – just as I was juggling pub camera and mobile ‘phone – I looked up to see a cross from Jarod Bowen that ridiculously avoided everyone and bounced equidistant from the two central defenders, who both turned around to see who had tapped them on the shoulders, and in front of the ‘keeper. The ball squirmed in at the far post.

Bollocks.

The three-thousand visiting supporters roared, and our hearts dipped.

“1-0 to the Cockney Boys.”

Ugh.

On fourteen minutes, a Badiashile error, but a shot from Valentin Castellanos was saved by Robert Sanchez at his near post.

We were dominating the ball but were doing nothing at all with it.

I commented to Alan “Gittens is hard work.”

There was a moment just after when one of our centre-backs had the ball, and was not under a great deal of pressure, but there was simply no movement from anyone in a blue shirt ahead of him. It was infuriating. I started yelling into the abyss.

Our play was terrible. There was no physicality, no desire; just a timid bunch of players who seemed lost.

On twenty-six minutes, we were forced into a change as Gittens was injured. Pedro Neto took his place.

A shot from Moises Caicedo flew past Alphonse Areola in the West Ham goal.

On thirty-six minutes, a long ball out of defence found Bowen, who passed forward to Aaron Wan-Bissaka. His cutback was adeptly poked home by Crysencio Summerville.

The Cockneys and the Mockneys roared again.

Another ugh.

This was awful.

“Stamford Bridge is falling down.”

The Irons continued.

“Build it up with Claret and Blue.”

Just horrible.

This was my thirty-first Chelsea vs. West Ham United game at Stamford Bridge and our record in the previous thirty had been fantastic.

Won 20

Drew 6

Lost 4

I remembered the four losses vividly and I had bad vibes about this one now.

Just on half-time, West Ham had a corner down below us. I watched the Chelsea players just pacing around with no urgency, nobody talking to each other, nobody cajoling others to roll up their sleeves and get close to their men, nobody taking the lead, nobody shouting.

What a terrible sight.

At the half-time whistle, boos.

I muttered to a few friends, with no joy, that the first-half performance that I had just witnessed just might have possibly been the worst I had ever seen.

We had nothing. We had hardly carved out a single chance. I remember a Cole Palmer free kick, but that was the sum of our efforts on goal. Alejandro Garnoch – God, I want him to do well – had been dire, as had many.

It had been such a pallid, tame, grey performance.

There were, unsurprisingly, three changes at the break.

Wesley Fofana for Badiashile.

Marc Cucurella for Hato.

Joao Pedro for Garnacho.

I liked the idea of Joao Pedro playing just behind Delap but hoped that he wouldn’t get too tired chasing after his knockdowns.

However, the improvements were not immediate. After forty-seven minutes, we had to rely on a fantastic save from Sanchez from Mateus Fernandes, and three minutes later a quickly taken free kick resulted in a shot from Bowen that Sanchez saved again.

On fifty-five, Cucurella played in to Delap, but a delicate touch took the ball wide of the far post.

Two minutes later, a tantalisingly good cross from Fofana on our right was aimed perfectly at the leap of Joao Pedro. From close-in, he scored.

GET IN.

The bridge, at last – it had been so quiet – got going.

“CAREFREE. WHEREVER YOU MAY BE. WE ARE THE FAMOUS CFC.”

Immediately, our players now looked like they wanted it. Their body language changed and there was a bounce in their step.

After an hour of horrendous football, the boys were back in town.

On sixty-three minutes, a thunderous blast from Caicedo was superbly saved by Areola.

Four minutes later, a shot from Castellanos whizzed past a post, low and wide.

On seventy minutes, a deep cross from Neto on our left was headed back across the goal by Malo Gusto. A defender headed the ball onto the bar as Delap jumped with him, and the ball bounced down. In came a diving Cucurella to head it home.

The net rippled.

What a goal.

What a moment.

I found myself standing in the walkway above my seat, punching the air with booth fists, only to see the bloke behind me doing exactly the same thing. We screamed at each other. It could not have been choreographed any better.

Bloody hell.

Then VAR stepped in.

The goal stood.

I didn’t cheer the VAR decision.

The game continued. The noise boomed around Stamford Bridge. The visitors were silent now.

On eighty-one minutes, Reece James replaced Gusto.

On eighty-five minutes, a snapshot from West Ham’s Jean-Clair Todibo hit the side netting. How he missed I will never ever know.

Cole Palmer slapped a low shot towards goal that was deflected away at the last moment by a West Ham defender.

Fackinell.

Referee Anthony Taylor’s assistant signalled five minutes of extra-time.

Could we do it?

In the second minute of added time, Palmer played the ball square to Caicedo. An intelligent run by Joao Pedro was spotted by our Moi. At this stage I pulled my camera up to my eyes and caught a very blurred shot of the pullback to Enzo. I clicked as the Argentinian shot – a ridiculously blurred photo – and exploded with joy as I saw the net ripple.

I was up on my feet yelling like a lunatic. Inside I was boiling over, outside I was beaming a huge smile, But I bizarrely I remained stupidly calm to take some photos of the scorer.

Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap.

Some of them worked. I hope you like them.

Late on, we watched on from afar as some players lost control down near Parkyville. It took forever to work out what was happening, and again the folk watching on TV must have had more of a clue than us. There was a VAR check, but nobody in the stadium knew which player was being scrutinised for a possible red card.

In the end, in the eleventh minute of added time, Jean-Clair Todibo was ordered off.

Soon after, the whistle blew.

What a last half-hour. What a comeback. What a day.

By now, only PD and I were left in our row in The Sleepy Hollow, and we sang along to “Blue Is The Colour” like a couple of sixty-four and sixty-year-old schoolkids.

Fantastic.

Eventually we made our way out, and we walked through “Jimmy’s” down below us. I bumped into Paul from Reading – his smile wide – and after a few seconds we found ourselves in an embrace, bouncing up and down like bleeding idiots.

Outside on the Fulham Road, we met up with PD and Jimmy, and we wolfed down some cheeseburgers.

Then, over to Frankie’s where we bumped into a brilliant cross-section of Chelsea friends and faces. Jason Cundy was holding court in the corner, ex-player Garry Stanley breezed in, we met up with Alex and Rob again, plus a few famous and infamous Chelsea personalities.

The three of us returned to “The Eight Bells” where we met up with Hans, Jon and Sven once again.

At about 11pm, I left PD and Parky to it and trotted over to room 310.

It had been a bloody perfect day.

Oh and – this:

Played 31

Won 21

Drew 6

Lost 4

Next up, Arsenal in the League Cup Semi-Final.

I will see six thousand of you there.

Outside And Inside The Pubs Of Hammersmith And Fulham

Outside And Inside Stamford Bridge.

The Birthday Boy With Garry Stanley.

Tales From An In-And-Out Mission

Posted on January 30, 2026 by Chris Axon

Crystal Palace vs. Chelsea : 25 January 2026.

I have previously penned ten match reports involving Chelsea away games at Selhurst Park against Crystal Palace and I suspect that in each one of them I have mentioned the difficulty in reaching the stadium via whatever means possible.

It’s just not an enjoyable journey by train nor car.

Also, once the immediate area of the stadium is reached, there is only one pub that is hospitable to away fans.

For these reasons, and for the fact that the kick-off time on this Sunday in January was 2pm, it was soon decided that this would be a simple “in-and-out” trip with no pre-match, and a hopefully quick exit after.

PD had recovered from his ailments that forced him to miss Pafos, and I collected him at 8.30am, and Parky at 9am. Bizarrely, my sat nav took me east into very familiar territory – Fulham Broadway – before I shot over Wandsworth Bridge and straight south to a pre-paid parking spot to the north of Selhurst Park on Holmesdale Road, from which the Palace home end is named.

I spoke to the lads about my trip to Bristol the previous day to see my first Frome Town game of the year, and my first for over six weeks. My home town team defeated our old rivals Bristol Manor Farm 3-2 and are now, quite remarkably, a massive eleven points clear at the top.

This last section of driving took me a full forty-five minutes, and it honestly felt that I had driven on every street in south London. In the last couple of miles, my car climbed to the summit of Beaulieu Heights – and the views over a misty south London caught my breath – thus placing me within a hundred yards of the famous TV mast that has peered over Selhurst Park for decades.

Every time I see that mast, it takes me back to my first-ever visit to Selhurst Park in August 1989 when we lost 0-3 to tenants Charlton Athletic, my last Chelsea game before I disappeared off to North America for ten months. Emotional goodbyes to a loved one, surely, should never be that crap.

I dropped the lads off as close to the away turnstiles as possible, and was parked up at 12.30pm, a full four hours after picking up PD.

I had been expecting a typically soggy Selhurst, especially since I was in the front row for this game. However, on the walk to the away end, I was amazed how mild the weather was, and that the rain had held off.

There is an impressive mural in honour of Wilfred Zaha on the end of a house that overlooks that top corner of Selhurst. It sets the scene nicely. There are street vendors, vloggers, and both sets of fans milling around. You really get a sense of how the pitch was dug into the hilly contours of the area, much like at Hampden Park and Molineux. The rising line of houses on the hill at the far end evokes memories of players such as Don Rogers, Alan Whittle and our own Charlie Cooke playing for Palace in the early ‘seventies. It seems that Selhurst Park will always be set in the past, despite a flash upgrade on the main stand being given the go-ahead recently.

Inside, I soon bumped into PD and Parky – with the famous Druce brothers – and spotted the Kentuckians who were still in town. They were amazed how Selhurst sat cheek-by-jowl with tight residential streets. The visitors had seen Bromley play – and win – on the Saturday. They were looking for three straight Chelsea victories on this trip. There was also time for a photo with Stuart, a Chelsea season ticket holder from a nearby village to me. Lastly, a chat with Dave from Alsager in Cheshire, who has recently started penning some entertaining match reports this season.

I reached my seat in good time. Damn that winter sun shining bright above the main stand. And damn the fact that I had left my sunglasses in the car.

I was joined by my mate Stephen from Belfast, via New Orleans, and we had a good old natter.

After years of awful sightlines in the away end, I was just happy to have an unimpeded view of the entire pitch, even the corner flag away to my left, an object that I only ever presumed existed having not seen it since a visit to see us take on Wimbledon – another tenant – in 1998 when the Chelsea fans were lodged behind the goal that was to my right.

The kick-off approached.

Liam Rosenior chose this team.

Robert Sanchez

Reece James

Benoit Badiashile

Trevoh Chalobah

Marc Cucurella

Andrey Santos

Moises Caicedo

Estevao William

Enzo Fernandez

Pedro Neto

Joao Pedro

Flames, fireworks, and the sky was flecked with red, white and blue plumes of smoke.

Crystal Palace were in the latest version of their red and blue stripes and Chelsea were in the off-white ensemble but with those muted green socks.

The Chelsea lot were in good voice as the game began.

We attacked the curved roof of the Holmesdale Road Stand, but the first chance for either team took place at the Whitehorse Lane End. The much-derided Badiashile lost possession, and the striker Jean-Phillippe Mateta struck a firm effort goalwards. Thankfully Sanchez was in fine form, the ball hitting his right-leg, and then flying away to safety.

As against Pafos, we watched a succession of James corners being flighted towards the near post. There was a shot from Enzo, centrally, that was fired over the bar.

Mateta was a towering presence, and he was involved with a few good battles with Chalobah as the half-developed.

The home team had been going through a tough time, with their manager deciding to let on that he was feeling perhaps too claustrophobic among those narrow and overcrowded Selhurst streets and that he would be away in the summer. Their form had dipped prior to this game. There seemed like a degree of tension from their fans.

We goaded them with chants about their “famous atmosphere.”

It was a mixed start to the game with dull build-ups from us, but then occasional rapid breaks. Both Stephen and I noticed that Estevao was quiet in the first twenty minutes.

I tended to become nervous when the ball was played to Badiashile. I always feel that his left boot is on his right foot, while his right boot is on his left foot.

Meanwhile, Cucurella was charging around, covering the inadequacies of others with his usual terrier-like dynamism.

Limited chances were exchanged. Both teams struggled to find their feet, and the game took some time to really get going.

On thirty-four minutes, a defensive mistake in front of the old main stand – an errant back-pass from Jaydee Canvot, whoever he is – and Estevao was away, racing at top speed towards the Palace ‘keeper and captain Dean Henderson. I thought that he had taken the ball too far, but he lashed it past the ‘keeper and the Chelsea crowd roared.

FACKINGETIN.

Huge celebrations from us all, and I turned my pub camera towards my fellow fans in the front row.

Euphoria.

From a few yards away to my left.

“THTCAUN.”

Alan was at the game, fantastic.

The home team improved after our goal, and it became a decent contest.

There was still time to annoy Palace though : “where’s your famous atmosphere?”

Stephen commented “give it to Estevao, he’s more of a threat than the rest put together.”

Five minutes before the break, Estevao took off on a brilliant run, racing past his marker with aplomb, but we watched in agony as his low shot whizzed past the far post.

Fackinell.

At half-time, I was happy. The players had improved in that first forty-five minutes. With them attacking us in the second period – and with me in the front row with my camera – everything was looking positive. The rain was still holding off.

The players “huddled” before the second half, and I wondered why.

Four minutes into the second-half, Chalobah won a battle with Mateta and intelligently passed to Joao Pedro, who passed to Enzo. Enzo passed to Estevao who lofted a beautiful first-time pass towards Joao Pedro. He sold Adam Wharton a dummy, cut inside and struck at goal. I saw the ball fly up and into the roof of the net.

GETINYOUBASTARD.

More noise.

I felt a hand push me forward from behind – “here we go, these celebrations at Selhurst can get ridiculous” – but that was it. I steadied myself, as best I could, and snapped away.

We were 2-0 up and our play improved further as the second half continued. This was very enjoyable.

Estevao – “Steve-o! Steve-o! Steve-o! Steve-o!” – then let fly at Henderson who kept him at bay with an acrobatic one-handed save.

On sixty-four minutes, Henderson got a hand on a cross from Enzo, and the ball fell to Joao Pedro. He shot, but it was blocked. Play continued, we thought nothing of it.

Then after the best part of a minute, VAR chirped up.

Another minute.

Why do these fucking reviews take so long?

The mic’d up referee Darren England spoke…

He first talked about an “accidental handball” but then pointed to the spot, and I could not have been more at a loss as to working out the modern laws. The “accidental” bit saved him Canvot – yes, him again – from a red.

Enzo collected the ball from down in front of us, placed it on the spot and steadied himself.

I steadied myself.

He shot.

I shot.

Goal.

We were 3-0 up.

GETINYOUBUGGER.

More up-close-and-personal photos.

Lovely stuff.

I had not noticed Wharton’s first yellow, but on seventy-two minutes he fouled again and a voice nearby went up :

“Second yellow!”

Indeed, the referee agreed and off he went.

This reminded me of the away game at Manchester City at the start of the month when a nearby wag shouted “second yellow” every time a City player tackled a Chelsea player with extra aggression. Ah, that terrace humour.

On seventy-four minutes, changes.

Wesley Fofana for Caicedo.

Jamie Gittens for Estevao.

Malo Gusto for Neto.

On eighty-one minutes, another change.

Jorrel Hato for James.

On eighty-five minutes, a final change.

Liam Delap for Joao Pedro.

Bizarrely, being down to ten men seemed to inspire Palace and they enjoyed a surprisingly positive end to the match. On eighty-eight minutes, Sanchez saved well from a Jefferson Lerma header, but Chris Richards was on hand for a consolation goal.

A huge nine minutes of extra time were signalled, and yes – of course – this caused ripples of concern in the Arthur Wait stand.

But we saw them out.

The players came over to milk the applause, and shirts were hoisted into the away end.

“Liam! Liam! Liam! Liam!”

I am warming to the bloke.

Outside, I met up with a few mates and eventually Parky joined PD and myself. We trundled back to the waiting car.

We were happy as hell.

It had been a fine day in deepest South.

Tales From A Never-Ending Story

Posted on January 29, 2026 by Chris Axon

Chelsea vs. Pafos : 21 January 2026.

January 2026 is a busy month for Chelsea Football Club, and a busy month for me. At the end of it I will have driven 1,400 miles in support of my team encompassing seven trips to London and one trip to Manchester. You can throw in around 20,000 words too.

However, when the alarm sounded at 4.30am, I was not overjoyed to be getting up so early to get stuck into an early shift at work which allowed to drive up to London for the Champions League game with Pafos.

A very long day was ahead of me, and there was a definite ambivalence to the thought of the match at the end of it. This first phase of the Champions League schedule seemed to go on for ever.

“Is it not finished yet? It’s the middle of bloody January!”

No, we still had two more games to play, despite starting off against Bayern in Bavaria in the middle of September some four months ago. UEFA’s pathetic desire for “more, more, more” meant that the old group phase of six matches has now grown to eight, with the threat of an extra couple of play-offs games thrown in too.

It felt to me, as I made my way over to Melksham at 5.30am, that this competition was never-ending.

And I disliked it – the format – so much. Eight random games, spread out over four months, what is there to like?

Originally, I thought about having my own little pathetic protest by not going to the extra fourth game that UEFA had foisted upon us, and the match with Pafos was very likely to be the game that I would decide to avoid. But then Chelsea threatened us season ticket holders with not getting our own seat if we did not buy all four home games, and so my one game boycott didn’t get off the ground.

Ironically, a bout of ill-health meant that I still missed a game – Barcelona – but was too ill to even think about getting my money back by selling that ticket back to the club. It was all a bit of mess.

So, Pafos, then, and a visit by David Luiz’ new club. I last saw him playing for Flamengo in the Maracana eighteen months ago. As the day developed, I was unaware that he had received a knock at the weekend.

Unfortunately, the tousle-haired defender was not the only person who was unable to take part in the evening’s entertainment. PD was suffering with flu and so I was accompanied by just Parky on the trip to London. Heavy traffic over the last few miles meant that I wasn’t parked until 5.30pm, some three-and-a-half hours after leaving work. There had been plans to head down to the pub, but it was a rainy old night in deepest Fulham and so I sought refuge in my usual midweek restaurant; calamari and moussaka this week. I then dropped into another favourite café for a coffee. This killed a nice amount of time and helped me avoid getting too wet.

I was inside Stamford Bridge at 7.15pm.

Through the day I had contemplated some word play involving our opponents from Cyprus.

Pafos.

From the city of Paphos.

I kept thinking of pathos; “a quality that evokes pity or sadness.”

I wondered who would be sad at the end of the night.

Us or them?

To give ourselves the best chance of reaching the top eight in the “league of thirty-two teams” we needed to win, desperately, against Pafos, especially since our last game was a very tricky away trip to Napoli. This huge listing of thirty-two teams has hardly caught my attention at all, and I suspect that it will only really be studied when there is just one game left. What a tedious process.

Soon after I reached my seat, I spotted the Pafos players warming up at The Shed. I heard David Luiz’ name mentioned by the stadium announcer, and I saw it featured on the TV screen. I therefore presumed that he was playing. I searched hard for his familiar features on the pitch but could not locate him anywhere. There was a bloke with long hair who looked like Matthew McConaughey, but not David Luiz. I was momentarily stumped.

I did briefly wonder if, unbeknown to any of us, a few Hollywood types had watched on from afar at the Wrexham phenomenon and had wanted a piece of the action too. Literally. Perhaps they had secretly taken over this little-known Cypriot club – only formed in 2014 – and had changed their names so they could experience Champions League football for themselves.

That was it, then.

Ivan Sunjic was really Matthew McConaughey.

Jay Gorter was Ben Stiller.

Bruno Langa was Will Smith.

Pepe was Seth Rogen.

Georgios Michael? Surely not.

As for us, the Chelsea all-stars lined up as follows :

Jorgensen

Gusto – Fofana – Badiashile – Hato

James – Caicedo

Neto – Fernandez – Garnacho

Delap

It feels like whoever is the Chelsea manager these days just spins a wheel to decide centre-back pairings.

There seemed to be many tickets going spare on various social media sites during the build-up to this game, and Sir Les reckoned that only around 32,000 would be inside for this one, despite whatever gate is officially announced. Without PD, Clive and Alan alongside me, it felt odd to be by myself at Stamford Bridge for this game. I could see empties all over the stadium and guessed that the place was maybe two or three thousand shy of a sell-out.

Flames, fireworks, the Champions League anthem.

At 8pm, kick-off, and Chelsea attacked the Matthew Harding Stand.

Hey, it was a terrible game, right?

It really did not have much going for it at all. I noted, as I tend to do at most games these days, some important bits and pieces on my ‘phone as the first half began, but looking at them now, they only illustrate the paucity of entertaining stuff on show.

The tone of the evening was set in the first few minutes when a Reece James free kick down below us did not get past the first man, and then a pass out from the ‘keeper Filip Jorgensen went out for a throw-in to Pafos. There then followed a couple more mistakes. Less than ten minutes had gone, and it was already setting up to be a shocker.

It seemed that the only bright spot of the entire evening was the Pafos ‘keeper Jay Gorter’s all red kit.

On ten minutes, Pedro Neto cut in from the right, and shot over, as he invariably does these days.

Looking at Liam Delap leading the line, then coming short to play the ball back to supporting team members, I wondered if we actually see him play the ball with aplomb to the likes of Enzo and James, or do we just witness a heavy touch that sometimes results in the ball ending up at the feet of a team mate. Answers on a postcard.

A lovely twist and turn from Enzo set up a shot from James from outside the box, but it whizzed past the right-hand post. I thought it was in.

On around twenty minutes, a cross from Neto, a leap from Enzo and a goal. But the referee called it back for a push by our Argentinian.

I grew tired of Alejandro Garnacho receiving the ball in a wide position, one-on-one with a defender, yet unwilling to take him on, and play the ball back to a central defender. I wondered if Pat Nevin, in his prime, ever had the ball at his feet and chose to play the ball back to Joe McLaughlin. Answers on another postcard.

On twenty-two minutes, Garnacho fell over down below us, and I wondered if Pat Nevin ever did that either.

It was tedious “pass, pass, pass, pass” stuff, and the bloke behind me said that it would be even worse in the second half when all this monotonous football would be taking place down the other end of the pitch towards The Shed.

I grimly replied, “oh well, best make the most of it.”

On the half-hour, a rare Pafos attack and the ball reached Jaja – or was it Lady Gaga? – on the left. His shot was deflected onto the near post, and we breathed a sigh of relief.

The two-thousand or so Pafos fans were some of the quietest visitors I have witnessed at The Bridge. Most remained seated the entire game.

Benoit Badiashile went wide with a header, and after some typical doggedness from Enzo, the ball fell to Moises Caicedo who forced a fine reaction save from Gorter.

Another shot from Caicedo was pushed away by Gorter, who was quickly becoming the man of the moment.

On a rare break into our half, the Pafos number seven Bruno – with the original Willian-style hair – broke away but Garnacho made a fantastic sliding tackle.

Throughout the entire half we watched as Reece James dropped corner after corner towards the near post. Most of them were dapped away with ease.

In injury time, the move of the match, and Caicedo set up Jorrel Hato but his strongly struck shot was well saved by Gorter.

The half-time stats on the TV screen showed Chelsea with 68% possession. It seemed a lot more. My man of the half was Enzo, equally strong in attack and defence.

At the break, Liam Rosenior made two substitutions. Bizarrely, Robert Sanchez replaced Jorgensen, while Estevao Willian replaced James. Enzo dropped back while Neto came into the middle and did his best to receive Delap’s knockdowns.

The second half began against a silent backdrop. The place really was so quiet.

I said to the stranger next to me that “I have seen more exciting games of draughts.”

However, just as those words exited my mouth, a pass from Delap to Enzo and a delightful chip towards Estevao brought a cracking first-time volley from the young Brazilian, but also another fine save by Gorter at his near post.

The game meandered on.

The rain fell.

Around the hour mark, the football improved slightly. Gorter fumbled a shot but recovered well. Then some neat play out on our left and a frankly unnerving back-heel from Benoit Badiashile set up Estevao who weaved inside but saw his firm shot blocked.

On sixty-five minutes, we recovered from a terrible Fofana back-pass and in the very next move we broke rapidly, and the ball was pushed towards Garnacho. He was one on one with the ‘keeper but his shot was blocked by the outstretched leg of Drew Barrymore.

Two more efforts on the Pafos goal.

Caicedo from distance; saved.

Garnacho again; over.

Fackinell.

On seventy minutes, a triple substitution.

Marc Cucurella for Hato.

Jamie Gittens for Garnacho.

Joao Pedro for Delap.

With a quarter of an hour remaining, the crowd suddenly put their big boy pants on, and got behind the team

“CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA – CAM ON CHOWLSEA.”

A few minutes later, Sir Les started to make his exit. Like us, he was headed back to Melksham.

“Can’t watch any more of this crap.”

Thirty seconds later, I found myself commentating as Neto took a corner.

“Another floater to the near post…oh, we’ve done it.”

Les had just missed the goal. I felt for him.

A Fofana knock-on at the near post, then a Caicedo jump to head home towards the far post, and the players celebrated down near Parkyville.

GET IN.

Chelsea 1 Pafos 0.

Bizarrely, this seemed to ignite the away team, and they played their best football of the game in the closing moments.

On eighty-nine minutes, Georgios Michael replaced Whoopi Goldberg, the last of their five subs, and that was that. I was annoyed that David Luiz never appeared from the bench. I final “thank you and goodbye” would have been lovely.

I met up with Parky and we drove back to the west of England. My fifth of eight consecutive games in London were in the bag, with just trips to Selhurst Park, Stamford Bridge – again – and The Emirates to go.

Oh, the gate?

The official Chelsea site claimed 39,200. Elsewhere it was given as 30,774.

The actual figure?

Answers on a postcard.

Tales From The Addicks And The Addicts

Posted on January 13, 2026 by Chris Axon

Charlton Athletic vs. Charlton : 10 January 2026.

The two domestic cup competitions continued to serve us well in season 2025/26. After a decent Autumnal tour of England and Wales – Lincoln, Wolverhampton and Cardiff – in the League Cup, the FA Cup first gave us an away day at Charlton Athletic, a ground that I had not visited since the opening day of 2002/3, and which the club had not visited since early in 2007.

A visit to The Valley was long overdue.

The kick-off time of 8pm would normally have resulted in much wailing – more of that later – but on this occasion, the timings worked out in our favour. I spotted a good deal at the Premier Inn opposite “The Eight Bells” and booked four of us – Glenn, PD, Parky and little old me – in for the Saturday night.

It took me a while to devote some time to planning a pre-match pub-crawl but on the Friday night (just before I set about writing the Fulham match report), I decided that we would hit a few pubs that were centered on The Strand. It is an area that we have covered before, but most of the hostelries would be new.

I left home at 8.45am and soon collected the three chaps. There was a filling breakfast at “McDonald’s” in Melksham, and I soon found myself driving down the Fulham Palace Road only two-and-a-half days after driving up it after the limp 1-2 defeat at Craven Cottage on the Wednesday. We booked in at the hotel, prised Salisbury Steve away from “The Eight Bells”, which was slowly being filled by Middlesbrough fans prior to their cup tie at Fulham, and headed off to Embankment.

By about 1pm, we were drinking outside the first of the pubs of the day, the “Sherlock Holmes”, and the oddest part of that short visit was being approached by a bloke from the Florida Keys – on his first day in London, in England, in Europe – who told us “he just likes hearing you guys talk.” He seemed harmless enough but looked completely confused when I started unravelling the story of the FA Cup for him and soon tried to divert the conversation back to his domain, the world of College Football. His wife soon dragged him back inside the pub, perhaps afraid he would catch a cold, or worse, gain a sudden passion for “soccer.”

We then walked the twenty yards to “The Ship & Shovel” which we visited a few years back before a trip to see us lose to Tottenham in their second season at Wembley. It’s a unique pub, with two rooms either side of a narrow walkway.

From there, another short walk to Villiers Street and a pint at “The Princess Of Wales” where we soon learned that Macclesfield Town from the sixth level of the English pyramid had defeated Crystal Palace, the current FA Cup holders. Here was a beautiful illustration of how the FA Cup, certainly in the early rounds, still captures the imagination of the romantics among us. By the time of the latter rounds, all the magic is sadly squeezed out of the oldest football competition in the world.

I remember dropping in to this pub en route to The Valley in November 2000, when we lost 0-2 on my first-ever visit, and Claudio Ranieri came under torrents of abuse from many among the Chelsea support. He was just finding out about his new charges and was prone to playing odd systems as he struggled to find a winning team. I seem to remember he played Dennis Wise as a right wing-back in that game, and we were collectively awful.

We then hopped over the street to visit “All Bar One”, the most modern of the pubs that were on the list, and probably the least enjoyable.

Next up, a minute walk to “Theodore Bullfrog” and I was so pleased to be able to tell the lads that Frome Town were winning 3-1 at promotion rivals Winchester City. I highlighted this game as the most difficult that we would face all season. The beer in this pub tasted all the sweeter.

By this time, a few folks had spotted our travels on “Facebook” and had suggested a couple of pubs that were not originally on my list.

Pub number six was “The Harp”, possibly my favourite of the new pubs, a cosy – but packed – boozer that oozed charm. It was now 4.30pm, Frome were still 3-1 up, and the beers continued to flow.

Next up, another unplanned pub, “The Marquis”, which was virtually next-door to the previous gaff, and another packed and cosy boozer, with lots of musical references around the bar; posters, props, artifacts, etc.

I asked a woman to take our photo of us in the bar.

I checked the photograph; it was a cracker and told her “You have the job. Welcome to MI5. We will see you on Monday.”

The last pub, number eight, was “The Nell Gwynne” and we had been joined by Small Bobby. He had played a game of football at 2pm and was keen to join us before heading over to the Chelsea match. We reached here at about 5.15pm and decided to make this the last call of the evening. It had been single drinks in all the others, but we stayed for three in this one, eleven all told, but I mixed some pints with some bottles to remain as lucid as possible. Stop laughing at the back. We found ourselves next to three women “of a certain age” who were – unfortunately for them, and us – Tottenham fans, but it didn’t spoil the evening.

In total, the eight pubs were covered in just twelve minutes of walking time. The first five were south of The Strand, the final three were north of The Strand.

It had been a blast.

We left there at about 6.30pm, and we all decided that catching an Uber was probably the best bet as it saved scurrying around the steps and escalators of various underground and mainline stations en route to The Valley.

While in the uber as it set off towards the Tower of London, past Canary Wharf and Poplar, then under The Thames, I spotted a quote on “Facebook” by ex-Leeds United manager Marcelo Bielsa that hit a chord.

I am not one for sharing too much that isn’t my own stuff on “Facebook” but I did so on this occasion.

Here it is :

“I am certain that football is in a process of decline. More and more people are watching the sport, but it is becoming less and less attractive. There are fewer and fewer footballers worth watching, and the game is less and less enjoyable.”

This mirrors my thoughts, and many that can compare the far less regulated styles of football in the past to the robotic “keep ball” of today, and it elicited a decent number of responses.

The conclusion?

It’s a drug, this football lark, and I commented that I am too old and too stupid to give it up.

My name is Chris, and I am a Chelsea addict.

Like many who were assembling at The Valley, no doubt.

The Uber ride took exactly an hour, and we were dropped off a few hundred yards away from the entrance to The Valley on Floyd Road. As I have only visited it twice before, and the last time was almost a quarter of a century ago, the approach wasn’t too familiar. As we reached the bottom of the incline, I found myself walking right in the middle of a mob of baying Charlton fans, and then within seconds an equally boisterous mob of Chelsea. There was a bit of a ruckus, but not much to get excited about.

With the stadium in view now, I quickly snapped a couple of photos of a chap grafting away and selling the hated “friendship scarves.”

“Half-Man, Half-Trinket, the face of shame.”

It was reassuring to see many old school faces queuing up to get inside. I guessed that absence made our cumulative hearts grow fonder and this was why we flocked to The Valley once more.

I was inside at 7.45pm and quickly found my seat…er position. Halfway through the first half, I realised that Glenn was two rows in front of me. 3,300 Chelsea were in the Jimmy Seed Stand and we were just a few feet apart. What were the chances?

The evening was already getting colder, and I was beginning to regret not wearing a warmer coat. But it’s always a balancing act when we dive in and out of pubs. I weighed up the options and plumped for being comfortable in a pub for six hours and cold at the football for two hours rather than too warm for six and toasty for two.

There was the usual modern-day nonsense of lights being dipped, flumes of smoke, and the home fans added to this silliness by going all “Spursy” by holding their phone torches above their heads, the loons.

Liam Rosenior was in charge for his first game, and we had touched upon our thoughts of him in the first pub or two. He seems an articulate so-and-so, and confident, and of course we wish him well.

His first Chelsea team?

Jorgensen

Acheampong – Tosin – Badiashile – Hato

Santos – Caicedo

Gittens – Buonanotte – Garnacho

Guiu

The game began and it seemed unreal that I was back at The Valley after a gap of over twenty-three years. In 2002, we won 3-2 on a hot and sultry August afternoon with a late goal from Frank Lampard but the weather was so different on this occasion. We attacked what used to be called “The Covered End” and a cross from Jamie Gittens on the right was soon claimed by the Charlton ‘keeper Will Mannion.

It seemed very much like we were playing the same way as before in the opening few minutes; I guess it’s difficult to change to a new style immediately.

There was a medical emergency in the first few rows of the Main Stand, and this held the game up. We really did not need any further hold-ups. God knows what time we would leave the stadium if this tie went to extra-time and penalties. A good guess would be 11pm and God forbid that.

There was a lovely Facundo Buonanotte lofted chip for James Gittens but his header was easily saved. We enjoyed a flurry of corners without testing their ‘keeper and then on eighteen minutes, Andrey Santos did not connect well with a shot, and it spun wide.

Halfway through the half, I could not help but chastise the players for absolutely no movement off the ball.

“You’d think the buggers would want to run around a bit in this cold weather, eh?”

I spotted that the bloke behind me had been behind me at Fulham too and I said to him “you would not invite a friend to watch this dull shite.”

A thunderous strike from Acheampong was well saved by their ‘keeper.

On the half-hour mark, a ridiculously high shot screamed over the bar, and this led to the first-ever time – I am sure – that the infamous “FCUKING USELESS” chant was directed at our own team and not after a shocking piece of play by the opposition.

Yes, we had sunk this low, and it brought back memories of when Ranieri was given a terrible verbal onslaught at The Valley way back in 2000.

The build-up continued to take forever, such is the way of football in the second quarter of the twenty-first century. This slow and meticulous “pass, pass, pass” style of play has blighted the game for years now, and it makes many – including Marcelo Bielsa no doubt – question the sanity of it all.

It feels to me that this is a mode of football that has been spawned by AI. It’s as if every game of football ever played has been processed through a series of huge computers the size of the Maracana and the boffins have observed that the most effective way to play is to relentlessly pass the ball across the pitch until the defending team momentarily loses concentration, or the will to live, until the ball is pushed home from eight yards.

No thrills, no imagination, no skills, no entertaining dribbles, no one-on-ones, no crunching tackles, no variation. Just a grim grinding of gears as players go through set patterns of play that have been practised on training pitches for hours on end.

I don’t know what Cloughie would make of it all.

Football is now like a car journey, planned meticulously by Sat Nav where the only concern is fuel economy and not the scenery. It’s like travelling from Bristol to Birmingham and keeping to the greyness and monotony of the M5 motorway and avoiding the beautiful Cotswolds, the picturesque villages and market towns, the sweeping views of the Severn Vale and the patchwork of fields with stone walls and hedgerows.

On thirty-three minutes we played the ball back to Jorgensen and the Chelsea faithful clapped sarcastically.

Then, a loud burst from us.

“ATTACK! ATTACK! – ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK!”

I pleaded for someone to drop a shoulder. For somebody to do something.

On forty-four minutes, a Garnacho shot was blocked.

The play was so poor. I wanted the players to be less conservative, to take a chance.

In the fourth minute of injury time, a cross from our left was aimed at Marc Guiu who headed the ball back to where Jorrel Hato was stood. The ball bounced once and the left-back smacked it cleanly into the roof of the net.

Get in, thank the Lord.

We were ahead, just.

Half-time was reached.

A friend texted me to say that we had enjoyed – if that is the correct word – seventy-eight percent possession in that first-half.

Five minutes into the second half, down below me, Bounanotte lashed a great free-kick towards the near post and Tosin speared the ball in via a fine glancing header.

Not long after, a confident run from Alejandro Garnacho was followed by a cheeky curler that just went wide of the far post.

On fifty-five minutes, Charlton enjoyed their best chance thus far and the ball went off for a corner. From the resulting kick, Jorgensen did ever so well to pat away a header, but the rebound was crashed home by Miles Leaburn, who is the son of former Charlton striker Carl Leaburn.

Another name from that haunted 1987/88 season. After Leroy Rosenior scored against us at West Ham – as mentioned in my last report – we played Charlton at home and Carl Leaburn was in their team who equalised in the ninetieth minute, forcing us into the play-offs.

Red and white smoke bombs rained down from a corner of the home end. I spotted a Charlton flag in that corner that featured their “Addicks” nickname, one of the oddest in our professional game. The story behind it is very fishy.

On sixty-two minutes, Garnacho dribbled in and set up Buonanotte. His shot was weakly parried and Guiu slotted home. I captured his celebrations with my pub camera.

On sixty-six minutes, Estevao replaced Gittens and the away choir sang his Samba song.

Bloody hell it was cold.

On sixty-nine minutes, more changes.

Liam Delap for Guiu.

Enzo Fernandez for Buonanotte.

Five minutes later we kept warm by sing a loud “One man went to mow” and Estevao cut in but his shot was finger-tipped over.

Estevao added a little pizazz to the game and set up Enzo and Delap before again threatening Mannion with another shot.

Then the fog hit us, and the place became greyer and greyer.

And colder and colder.

Fackinell.

On eighty-five minutes, more changes.

Wesley Fofana for Hato.

Pedro Neto for Garnacho.

A shot from Enzo, high and wide. Then in the first minute of injury time, the Argentinian World cup winner sped forward and passed to Neto. He lost his marker and then drilled a low shot in at the near post.

Three minutes later, Mannion fell at the feet of Estevao after another lively incursion, and the referee pointed at the spot.

Enzo smashed it home. It was the last kick of the game.

Charlton Athletic 1 Chelsea 5.

The players came over to thank us for our support on this cold and foggy night.

We soon serenaded the new manager.

“Liam! Liam! Liam! Liam!”

Job done, can we go home now?

Actually, no we couldn’t. For some reason that was never fully explained, the police kept us penned in on the crowded road that connected the exit of the away end to Floyd Road for around forty minutes, with all of us getting colder and colder by the minute. We were towards the back, so just stepped away from the mob, but tempers were rising as the sirens wailed, the lights flashed and the night drew on.

Eventually we slowly walked to the top of Floyd Road, sadly managed to avoid finding the Uber driver I had booked – and he managed to avoid us too – and so we eventually caught a train back to London Bridge at around 11pm or so.

We gobbled down some bloody awful “McDonalds” burgers under the station’s arches and then took a beautifully warm Uber at midnight that took us through South London, over the Thames at Lambeth, then close to the London Eye, the Houses of Parliament and eventually down the Kings Road to Fulham. We reached our base at 12.30am.

Sleep!

Next up, a League Cup semi-final at home to Arsenal.

Bernie Slaven’s son doesn’t play for them, does he?

Let’s All Go Down The Strand