Tales From A Nine-Goal Thriller

Chelsea vs. Leeds United : 9 September 2026.

Here was yet another trip to London, the fifth in a run of eight Chelsea matches, all in the capital. On this Wednesday night, neatly sandwiched between two league games, we were playing a League Cup tie at home to our old adversaries Leeds United. Additionally, here was a condensed stretch of three trips to London in just seven days.

PD came up with me for this match. After parking up on Rylston Road, I spotted friends Liz and Long Tall Pete in “Vanston Cafe” at the bottom end of the North End Road and joined them for a bite to eat. This was a first visit for me; I wolfed down a chicken schnitzel burger, and two of Pete’s spicey chicken goujons for good measure too. Tasty food – recommended!

I spent some time with PD and Salisbury Steve at “The Eight Bells” where it was lovely and quiet, and we had a good natter. News of the starting eleven came through as we made our way up the steep steps at Putney Bridge tube station.

Xabi Alonso had certainly rung the changes.

Mike Penders

Josh Acheampong – Maxence Lacroix – Levi Colwill

Malo Gusto – Reggie Watson – Valentin Barco – Pep Chavarria

Estevao Willian – Danny Welbeck – Jamie Gittens

A debut, then, for young Reggie, at just sixteen and-a-half years old. A lad young enough to be my grandson if I had originated from Liverpool.

Gulp.

That’s a gulp for me coming from Liverpool, not him being my grandson.

Alas, there were delays on the District Line, with trains being held in both directions, and this resulted in us waiting on the northbound platform for over half-an-hour. More than a few Leeds fans disappeared off to find buses, cabs and Ubers. We decided to wait it out. At last, we just about squeezed on a train at just after 7.30pm. On the way to Fulham Broadway, we heard that the kick-off had been delayed for fifteen minutes. Outside the West Stand, I had never seen so many folks lining up to enter. Delaying until 8.15pm was a sensible move.

I made it to my seat at 7.55pm.

There were rumours of an incident at South Ken, but Alan had also heard of trouble at High Street Ken. I wondered if some Everton supporters had finally appeared after being chased down the tunnels at that station in 1978.

Stamford Bridge never looked like being full on this Wednesday night.

However, the Sleepy Hollow was in full force for this match; me, Alan, Clive, PD sitting cheek-by-jowl. Long Tall Pete was in the row in front. Perhaps he was looking for his two chicken goujons. Pete, like many, had been displaced from The Shed by the four thousand visitors from Yorkshire.

I smirked when I saw three thousand of them in the Shed Upper massed behind signage that proclaimed “World Champions.”

“No, not you.”

The teams took to the pitch.

Chelsea in blue / blue / white.

Leeds in yellow / black / yellow.

This was an odd choice from them; if it had been blue shorts, they would have not looked so alien. Their club colours from time immemorial are white, yellow and blue.

The game began with us attacking their supporters in The Shed. Soon into the game, they began their choruses of a few favourites.

“All Leeds aren’t we?”

“We are Leeds, we are Leeds, we are Leeds.”

We edged the first part of the match. There was a decent run by Gittens on the left, and into the penalty box, but his shot was parried by ‘keeper Michael Zetterer, whoever he might be. This was followed up by some nice play between some blue shirts, but a shot was blocked. The visitors were sloppy with their passing and gave the ball away cheaply in the first quarter of an hour.

Despite the noise emanating from The Shed, he Matthew Harding – which had been virtually silent – decided to mock the away support for their support.

This was pure irony.

Pure pantomime.

I suspect that Leeds had sold virtually all their allotted tickets, and these were probably priced more than the standard £30 for league games. I would have liked to have heard more from our loyalists but there were only sporadic outbursts from the home areas.

Sigh.

On twenty minutes the game came to life. A long throw from the far side was not dealt with, and Brenden Aaronson latched on to a loose ball. Penders blocked well from close range but was then able to spring to his feet to push over a header from Tarik Muharemovic.

From my angle, the saves looked spectacular.

I gasped “that’s almost the best I’ve seen up here” to Alan.

Penders pushed the ball behind from the resultant corner, but from the next one, we witnessed a different story. The ball was pumped long, and despite the close attention of three Chelsea defenders, Muharemovic climbed at the back stick and looped a header back over Penders who had wandered into no man’s land.

I saw the ball cross the line, but there was an eery silence for half-a-second until a) the Leeds fans saw the reactions of their players and b) the noise travelled the one-hundred and twenty yards to my lugholes.

Bollocks.

CFC 0 LUFC 1

Leeds, with their tails up, then dominated the game. On twenty-six minutes, a fine run and cross into the box, and we were lucky to escape. Three minutes later, a one-two and a strong run and cross by Danny James on their right, and the ball fell to Sean Longstaff, but he rushed his shot and the ball flew over.

Leeds were impressing me with their all-round play. We were second best all over the pitch.

On thirty-six minutes, the much-maligned Gusto did not spot the run from deep from Estevao and chose not to pass into space to allow the Brazilian the chance to advance. What followed was a pitiful display of “woe-is-me” histrionics from the youngster, and when he threw his arms up in a show of indignation, it looked like he was treating the people of Wakefield, Bramley, Pudsey and Beeston to his very own Christ the Redeemer.

Bloody hell.

We carved out so few chances.

On forty-two minutes, the ridiculously quiet Welbeck went just wide from an Estevao pass. Efforts from Gittens and Barco did not trouble the Leeds ‘keeper.

The debutant Watson was booked for a tackle that was pure Vinnie Jones in the final minute of the half.

At the break, the mood was very negative. Collectively we had been poor, and individually too. Watson the debutant had shown a degree of effort and enthusiasm, but of course it is so difficult to knit everyone together when they have not played as an eleven ever before.

During the day, my friend Jimmy had shared some sad news about a well-known Chelsea supporter who had passed away that afternoon. His dear friend Akis Kyriakou (aka “Aki” / “Agi”) had retired back to Cyprus recently, and Jimmy only visited him at a care home on Monday while he was on holiday. Agi had been suffering with dementia for some time. I can’t claim to know Agi well, but I recognised his face and he recognised mine. I would bump into him on European trips, and he was always smiling. Agi was deeply loved in the Chelsea community. His “Cyprus Blues” flag proudly flew on the West Stand wall for many years. At half-time I went to say a few words to my friend Zak, a dear friend of Agi and Jimmy, and we remembered him fondly.

RIP AKIS KYRIAKOU

As I returned to my seat, I saw Reece James and Pedro Neto warming up on the pitch. However, Alonso was not stopping with just two changes.

He made a phenomenal four substitutions at half-time.

Neto for Gusto.

James for Watson.

Palmer for Estevao.

Rogers for Gittens.

Our personnel suddenly seemed to increase in value by 100%.

But the pesky Northerners were not keeping to the script. Just two minutes into the half, a strong run by Ethan Ampadu, wrestling his way easily past Rogers, enabled him to reach the by-line and cross low. The ball was craftily touched back by Lukas Nmecha – “oh here we go” – and Aaronson smashed the ball in.

Fackinell.

South 0 North 2.

The away support roared.

“UNITED ARE BACK. UNITED ARE BACK.”

Momentarily, all seemed lost.

But Chelsea started to piece things together. On fifty-three minutes, Chavarria was upended by James in the box, and we were handed a lifeline. Palmer claimed the ball and confidently smashed the penalty to the ‘keeper’s left. It nestled snugly in the corner of the goal nets.

Perfect.

Vinnie Jones 1 Tony Dorigo 2

With that, Stamford Bridge, so docile until then, seemed to be injected with a lorryload of Class A stimulants, and the noise boomed around the stands. Leeds must have wondered what had hit it.

“CAREFREE – WHEREVER YOU MAY BE.”

Lo and behold, just two minutes later, a throw from Acheampong, a chested lay-off from Rogers into the path of Palmer, and from the edge of the “D”, the coolest finish anyone is likely to witness this season. A nonchalant sweep of his left peg, and the ball slowly tumbled into the goal, with Zetterer either unwilling or unable to move. He would probably claim he was unsighted, since Palmer deftly aimed around a lone defender.

Ron Harris 2 Billy Bremner 2

Now the noise went up a notch further.

“AND IT’S SUPER CHELSEA.”

Three minutes later, Palmer to James, but just wide.

On the hour, delicate skill from Barco – growing into the game now – allowed the ball to be moved on. Leeds inadvertently passed the ball to Palmer who advanced the ball towards Rogers, making a strong central run. His slide moved the ball on, and from a very similar position to Palmer, Neto aimed at the far post.

Zetterer was again beaten.

The place erupted again.

Pensioners 3 Peacocks 2

The noise increased even more.

We were all breathless.

Just five minutes later, and just after Palmer had gone close, we witnessed lovely skill from Danny Welbeck inside the box from a pinpoint Rogers cross. He dummied one way before swivelling to stab home the other. His euphoric run over to the far corner was accompanied by tumultuous cheering.

Bloody hell.

Blue / Blue / Yellow 4 White / White / Red 2

Palmer hit the side netting.

Would there be more goals? Sadly yes, at The Shed End. Substitute Dominic Calvert-Lewin finished off a crisp one-touch move with fifteen minutes to go, and – ridiculously – it became nervy again.

Millwall Badge 4 Smiley Badge 3

Wesley Fofana replaced Colwill. The game began again, with a new vigour and a new sense of jeopardy.

On eighty minutes, Rogers broke strongly down the right and aimed a low cross into the six-yard box. The luckless ‘keeper touched it towards the waiting Barco, who smashed the ball purposefully home.

Headhunters 5 Service Crew 3.

The Bridge noise levels went through the roof and other cliches.

I caught the Argentinian’s slide down below me and caught his wild emotion. This was another fine game from the young lad; on the evidence provided, he might well turn out to be the buy of the season.

Still Leeds kept going; here was a mazy run into our box on their left, but a shot was blocked.

Palmer fancied varying it with an impudent chip, but the ball was well over.

Six minutes of extra-time were signalled.

In the fourth of those, a nice move built up after Leeds head tennis, and Palmer flicked towards finding Neto wide right. His ball inside was helped on by Rogers, then Palmer again. It ran to Barco who slashed wildly. The ball was heading off for a goal-kick but hit Welbeck and caromed into the net.

Wallop!

Jimmy-Floyd Hasselbaink 6 David Hopkin 3.

What a bloody ridiculous night. At half-time, nobody could have possibly expected us to score six in the second half. At times, it was breathtaking. It was glorious. And it was loud.

In fact, the noise produced from 1-2 onwards was the highlight for me. It showed that we can still produce our old-style Chelsea noise when needed.

Top marks.

Happy to snap five of the nine goals too.

I walked back to the car and collected PD from outside “The Mitre” within twenty minutes. After a delayed kick-off, I was hoping for a quick getaway. Alas, soon into my return trip home, the Fulham Palace Road was closed so I had to painfully retrace my path back to the North End Road. On top of that, the M4 and then the A303 was closed. This meant that I had to trudge slowly over Salisbury Plain through Ludgershall to Devizes.

On the way home, we wondered if we had ever been losing at half-time, with no goals, only to score six in the second period.

I doubt it.

We thought about nine goals in a game.

Neither of us had seen more. We both remembered the 1986 Full Members Cup Final, when nine goals were bizarrely shared and this was my personal high for many a year. How odd that my first trip to Wembley with Chelsea would result in nine goals. I had recollections of a 7-2 home win a few years back, but the 6-3 win at Goodison Park in 2014 didn’t come readily to mind.

But these games remain the highest for me.

1986 : Chelsea 5 Manchester City 4.

2010 : Chelsea 7 Sunderland 2.

2014 : Everton 3 Chelsea 6.

2026 : Chelsea 6 Leeds United 3.

Nearing Melksham, where PD’s car was waiting, I was hanging.

“I just want to brush my teeth and get to bed.”

I eventually reached home at 1.40am.

I still made time to share the joyful leap from Danny Welbeck on “Facebook” though. I couldn’t deprive you from seeing that one.

On Saturday, yet another trip to London as we play host to Hull City.

See you there.

AKIS KYRIAKOU RIP

Thanks Jimmy for the lovely photo.

Tales From The Fast Show

Chelsea vs. Luton Town : 27 August 2026.

Xabi Alonso’s first competitive game was behind him, and his first competitive game at Stamford Bridge was a League Cup encounter with Luton Town.

When the draw was made a few weeks ago, I wasn’t completely convinced that I would attend. This first week of the football season was going to be busy enough, with three Frome Town games and two Chelsea games from Saturday 22 August through to Monday 31 August; that’s five games in ten days. Did I really want to squeeze in another?

One of my main aims this season is to see if I can complete my fifth consecutive season of complete league fixtures; a run of 190 games. It would be quite some achievement and something that I would never ever have contemplated doing way back in my formative Chelsea years. Was I that fussed about missing an early League Cup game? Apparently not. After all, I have chosen to miss the occasional home game – invariably midweek – in past seasons, so one more game would not matter too much in the grand scheme of things.

Our new manager’s first home game was the friendly against Real Sociedad a couple of weeks ago, and on that day, Frome Town were at Havant & Waterlooville, aiming for a third consecutive league win. There was absolutely no way that I was missing that one.

However, as I thought about it, and as the decent price of £29 was announced, I threw caution to the wind and bought my ticket for the Luton tie. PD and Parky were keen to go too.

In the end, it would be rude not to.

Count me in.

It would now be a run of six games in ten days.

Back with a bang, eh?

Of course, there was a pre-season that centered on Australia and South-East Asia in July to kick things off for Alonso. I was certainly not tempted with that, despite gorgeous memories of Thailand and Malaysia in 2011, China in 2017 and Australia in 2018, but I saw the highlights of a few of those matches. Our first game of Alonso’s reign was against Western Sydney Warriors on 28 July; a match that ended 6-4 to Chelsea. I remember glancing at some of the unfamiliar names in our squad that night and some looked like particularly difficult selections of letters in a game of Scrabble.

Since those early days of 2026/27, Alonso has added to his squad. We have opted for a couple of old hands to add experience to the legion of “youngsters with potential” after the realisation that teams don’t “win with kids” too often became all too apparent last season. The acquisition of our perennial nemesis Danny Welbeck – I’ve lost count of the goals he nabbed for Brighton against us – was well received by me. However, our club’s desire to add Jordan Henderson to the mix was hard for me to swallow. I was aghast when he was named in the England squad in the US, and I could hardly believe that he was to join us at Chelsea. At the time it boiled down to Henderson, ex-Liverpool, or Xhaka, ex-Arsenal; neither to my taste. But then people spoke of Henderson’s role in helping to instil good practices in the squad environment and his leadership qualities.

Maybe he will turn out to be a Captain Mainwaring rather than a Corporal Sponge in the new army of players at Stamford Bridge this season.

We wondered if he might be involved against Luton.

At work the day after the Fulham game, several colleagues mentioned to me that they had enjoyed the match. This surprised me in a way. When I met up with the lads after the match on Monday night I had quickly judged the game as being 6/10, since it contained a mixture of performances. I think it was too close a result for me to enjoy it more and score it higher. Yet the neutrals had enjoyed the end-to-end passages of play, and why not? Perhaps I was being too harsh.

I worked another 6am to 2pm shift, but the commute up to my secondary place of work was hit by delays on the M4. On the raised section of this road at around Brentford’s stadium, I glanced at the shining arch of Wembley (a grim destination for us these days) six miles to the north and I also managed to spot the thin metallic needle of the Crystal Palace TV transmitter on the rise of high land around twelve miles to the south-east; the first-time that I had ever spotted it. This stunned me. I have seen over nine-hundred games at Stamford Bridge (and this means I surely must have visited London at least a thousand times in my life) yet I had not spied that spire ever before from the M4. It just goes to show that London never stops surprising me.

What with the delays, I didn’t drop the boys off outside “The Wolfpack” until 5pm. I revisited “Koka” again, then amazed myself by bumping into many Chelsea friends on the short walk down the North End Road. I then met up with PD, Parky, Jimmy the Greek and Salisbury Steve at “Tommy Tucker.”

We saw the team; Mike Penders, Valentin Barco and Danny Welbeck were debuting.

“Where do you think you are going, Sponge?”

Jordan Henderson wasn’t even on the bench. Perhaps he would be preparing the half-time energy drinks, checking the towels, or other light duties.

Rain was threatening with dark clouds overhead, and I only stayed a short while. There were a couple of photos on the walk to The Bridge (thanks for the photo, Jimmy; a rare snap taken by someone other than little old me and shared herein) and I was inside Stamford Bridge at just after 7pm. My phone would have to suffice for photos again and I apologise now.

Despite the cheap price of tickets, there were gaps everywhere. With around 4,500 Luton supporters in The Shed – to the west side – Parky was now repositioned alongside PD, and I was next to Alan.

With ten minutes to kick-off, “Our House” was played and I smiled. I was glad that I chose to attend this one.

Many of the away supporters were bedecked in the orange home shirt and I liked this flash of colour. Their kit has changed quite often over the years, and when we played them at Wembley in 1994, their first-choice kit was white shirts and light blue socks for some reason. I always like the orange and black combo.

At kick-off, many seats around us were unused.

We attacked The Shed.

First thoughts; four at the back this time?

Yes, it seemed so.

Mike Penders

Malo Gusto – Josh Acheampong – Maxence Lacroix – Pep Chavarria

Reece James – Valentin Barco

Estevao Willian – Cole Palmer – Morgan Rogers

Danny Welbeck

Former Chelsea youth Kasey Palmer was in the Luton team.

It was all Chelsea for the first five, ten, fifteen, twenty minutes. There were a couple of rare forays into our half for Luton early on – enthusiastically cheered by the Hatters’ support – but they did not threaten at all. They sat deep, unsurprisingly.

Nerdspeak : “Luton had a low block.”

Immediately, we were passing quicker, moving quicker, finding gaps quicker. I immediately felt happier watching this style of football.

It was still Chelsea, but faster.

The bright ginger hair of Barco seemed to make him stand out and I could not help concentrating on our young Argentinian starlet. He immediately looked neat and purposeful.

After around ten minutes, the setting sun behind the West Stand caused the steel of the East Stand and the sand brickwork of the hotel above the stand to obtain a surreal terracotta blush. The photo I took of the Chelsea lion has not been altered; it really was that orange. It gave the Stamford Bridge stadium an ethereal glow.

The orange Luton jerseys, on the pitch and in The Shed, the orange tint to the surroundings, and the deep ginger mop on Barco’s head. It was all in synch.

On eleven minutes, a sublime shimmy and run from Cole Palmer, following a pass from Estevao, squeezed in among combatants in the Luton box, thrilled us all but his shot was blocked by the ‘keeper Josh Keeley, and his follow-up effort was saved too.

From the corner, Palmer’s shot went wide. Malo Gusto shot wildly over, and then Welbeck headed at Keeley from close range.

On eighteen minutes, a well-struck free kick from Reece James was saved very well by the Luton ‘keeper, at full stretch to his left.

This was nice stuff from Chelsea. We were playing with ease, and it all looked very smooth. Gone was the reticence of previous eras in the recent past. There were purrs of delight among the SW6 loyalists.

Thankfully, Stamford Bridge had filled considerably but there were still tons of empty seats. I had seen that 49,000 had attended the Tottenham vs. Charlton game the previous night in the same competition; an impressive number. I wondered if we might get up to 35,000; I suspected not.

Barco continued to impress. He kept the ball moving but not in the ponderous way of Jorginho. His touch was light, and he played passes with an unerring calmness, and with pin-point accuracy. I bizarrely spotted the likeness to Danny Bonadeuce of “The Partridge Family” from those joyful Saturday mornings of my youth; “Sesame Steet”, “The Partridge Family”, Sam Leitch on “Grandstand” with his football preview.

I had just mentioned to Alan, who lives close to the Crystal Palace mast, that the visitors had not enjoyed a single effort on Penders’ goal, when a minute or so later, a shot came in from an angle down below us but was blocked.

On thirty-eight minutes, Barco slid a fine ball to meet a beautifully timed run into the box from Estevao, just beating the offside line, and this resulted in a shot that was whipped low across the goal, but which went wide of the far post.

It was hard to believe that we had not scored in this half of football. But there were no catcalls, nor boos. We could all see that this was an improvement in a playing style; the quality of opposition notwithstanding.

Dear reader : it was such a bloody relief.

In the first portion of the half, Estevao and Palmer had looked sensational, combining well, and full of tricks. Again, lovely to witness.

I had mentioned to Alan earlier : “It’s the Estevao show tonight, mate” and, at that very moment, he double-touched the ball as he stumbled and it went out for a goal-kick. I need to learn when to keep my gob shut.

In the last few five minutes of the half, however, I whispered to Alan “we have plateaued a bit.” We had lost a little zip of energy. Passes were taking a little longer to be made.

With that, a Luton free-kick, and a header from Hakeem Odoffin was on target but Penders easily claimed it.

On forty-four minutes, Estevao was the creator again as he set up Morgan Rogers, otherwise relatively quiet, but his volley smacked against the bar.

Nice interplay between Chavarria and Rogers set up Palmer, but another blocked shot.

It had been a night, thus far, of almost total domination, but it was 0-0 as the half came to an end. Lacroix had impressed me; physically strong, pacey, and happy to make decisions quickly. Alongside him, Josh continued to look a fine prospect.

At the break, I messaged some pals in the US :

“The players look like they know what they need to do. Bit of a radical approach to be honest.”

Five minutes into the second period, Estevao played a decisive pass that allowed the overlapping Gusto – our least-effective player thus far – to punch a super cross over and onto the head of a leaping Welbeck.

GOAL.

A trademark Welbeck goal.

Fantastic.

How he loved celebrating that one.

Alan looked at me.

I looked at him.

We both fidgeted with our glasses, Eric Morecambe-style.

“They’ll have to come at us now.”

“Come on my little diamonds.”

Lovely stuff.

We could relax, or could we?

Possibly not. A Luton equaliser, however unlikely, might mean that we would go into penalties right after the final whistle.

Barco continued his fine debut; receiving, a touch, a pass, on target, always. He reminded me of the light-footed Billy Gilmour with his economy of movement.

On the hour, Welbeck’s shot rolled just wide of the far post. Four minutes later, great shape from Palmer, but his beautifully struck shot skimmed the very top of the crossbar.

Three minutes later, a rare effort on Penders’ goal, a low drive from the other Palmer, but just wide.

Throughout this game, the atmosphere had not been too special. The away fans were hardly a wall of noise, but they kept producing a prime piece of glottal-stop English.

“Come on Lu’on, Come on Lu’on.”

They also quaintly sang of their rivals not as bastards or worse, but as just “Hornets.”

Bless.

Chelsea were quiet.

Shocker.

On sixty-seven minutes, some substitutions.

Jorrel Hato for Gusto.

Romeo Lavia for James.

Pedro Neto for Rogers.

On seventy-three minutes another.

Joao Pedro for Welbeck.

Or rather on seventy-four minutes; our punishment as Welbeck did not sprint off the pitch.

With ten minutes to go, Barco surprisingly lost the ball but soon wrestled the ball back and guided the ball to Palmer, who passed to Estevao outside. A shimmy, a shot at goal, but the unlucky Odoffin was in the way and could not divert the ball from going in.

Chelsea 2 Luton Town 0.

Phew.

Just after, Jamie Gittens replaced Steve-O.

Late on, Barco played the ball over to Acheampong but his header dropped just wide of the far post.

On ninety-minutes, a fine phase of possession football in and around their box, and an eventual shot from Joao Pedro that was blocked.

Then a moment later, a strong run from Gittens down below me but he smacked the post with a firm drive.

We should have won 5-0 really.

But I enjoyed this game. I saw glimpses of a fine future.

So, we play Leeds United at home in the next round, and a game that will be our eighth consecutive match in London. Just like Luton, we seem to avoid Leeds for years and years, but then play them again and again.

I think the atmosphere will be better for that one.

I met up with Parky and PD outside “The Mitre” at 9.45pm, and – an earlier one on this occasion – I was home at 12.30am exactly. It had been a smashing night of football.

Next up, another home match; Brighton on Sunday at 2pm.

I will see you there.

DAVE McCROSSEN.

Before the photos, a plug for my friend Dave McCrossen and his newly published tome, which covers last season’s slog, and is available on Amazon via book or Kindle. I have just bought my copy, and it promises to be a good read.

Us Chelsea matchday-going bloggers have to look after each other; there are only two of us.